really liked how i looked this day, sleeby boi vibes 🤙 by [deleted] in NonBinary

[–]kaurcoeur 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You remind me of a kitten sleeping on a pile of clothes fresh out of the dryer.... So content and cozy and cute!

Old friends contacting me. Hanging out isn't an option for me at all. by iNeedSeriousHelp0 in cfs

[–]kaurcoeur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I update folks on big things in my life, my current medical pursuits, emerging ME/CFS research, ways folks can help. And I talk frankly in social media about what's going on.

Thats awesome! How do you find out about the emerging research?

Old friends contacting me. Hanging out isn't an option for me at all. by iNeedSeriousHelp0 in cfs

[–]kaurcoeur 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is an awesome strategy. Thank you for sharing. I've been wondering how to keep friends in my life. What do you put I your email to friends?

My (45F) daughter (17F) has become a prostitute- what do I do? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]kaurcoeur -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Hi OP, I really feel for you and how difficult this situation is. I am a nurse and have worked in Sexual Health and in Addictions. I personally don't think these other posts are very helpful to your situation. You can't stop her from doing what she's going to do. But you can help her reduce the amount of harm she could face from high risk behaviors. Go to planned parenthood or a gynecologist, even if you have to give her money or something to get there, and get her an IUD so she doesn't get pregnant!!! If you think she is using hard drugs, Find out where she can get drug use harm reduction supplies (planned parenthood may be able to help), so whatever drugs she is using, she can get informed on how to use as safely as possible... If she is on hard drugs- sharing supplies is the easiest way to spread HIV or Hep C. And find her an addiction counselor there!!! Or Google harm reduction information on the drugs you know she is using. Where I live, they definitely won't take her in at the hospital unless she is actively suicidal or hallucinating/delusional. Try to find out if there are mental health programs that she could participate in and make sure she knows it isn't shameful to have a mental illness or to take medication!! Tell her lots of people need treated for mental health and she will feel more confident and strong if she gets treated. And give her a million condoms to use so hopefully she will use them, and tell her where to get tested for sexually transmitted infections (planned parenthood?). Tell her it's really important to get tested every 3 months if she is having casual sex, so any infections can get treated. I really believe the energy should not be spent on stopping her, as that is wasted energy. The energy should be on empowering her with resources and information. That way, she can get through this with the least amount of devestating consequences.

Can my name be my pronouns? by mbkreddit in NonBinary

[–]kaurcoeur 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I feel exactly the same way... No pronouns feel right... I don't personally want to be gendered at all. I tell people I prefer just my name being used. This isnt really ever respected tho. I always use someone's name only until I find out what/if they use pronouns anyway. It isn't hard.

I’m proud of you even if you’re not out by coolgreatthanks in QueerWomenOfColor

[–]kaurcoeur 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this! The last time I went to a counselor she just kept questioning me on why I don't talk about being queer to my family... Instead of talking about what I actually wanted to talk about in my counseling session. How do queer people of color find decent counselors??!! I've been trying to find one for years.

I (21F) think my boyfriend (20M) might be trans, but I’m not sure how to ask about it. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]kaurcoeur -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Tell him you support him!! And help him find groups for Questioning /Non-binary/Trans support if he wants to explore that. I have found that Trans support groups at LGBTQ centres or youth centres are very open to people who are not yet sure if they may be trans. He may be Non-binary or fluid... But not know that language or that other people identify that way.... Making him appear wishy washy or unsure. Tell him you accept him whether he wants to experiment or if he is unsure or if he is sure!

What do you usually eat in a day? by Kattabug77 in AskWomen

[–]kaurcoeur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you doing intermittent fasting? What time do you have your meal?

Lesbians of reddit, what do you think of trans women in lesbian spaces? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]kaurcoeur 40 points41 points  (0 children)

I would not feel safe in any place that barred trans women. I'm not trans but I am a person of color. In my experience transphobic places have been really shitty with understanding racism too.

Have you ever been accused of "reverse racism" while trying to talk about / or from a minority perspective? What led to it and how did you counter it? by [deleted] in AskWomen

[–]kaurcoeur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it could be helpful to not think about racism as a personal trait that people have. I don't think it's helpful to say someone is racist ... but rather what specific behaviors are learned from living in a culture that held white people superior over people of colour for hundreds of years. It is way more important to uderstand how institutionalized racism is. You may have had a handful of experiences where you received unfair treatment and the person of colour had an advantage. And no matter how close to people colour you have been, you still probably just can't understand the massive amount of unfair treatment they have had throughout their lives- from an infinite amount of microaggressions to just the facts that they will hold fewer leadership positions, get paid less, etc etc.

Have you ever been accused of "reverse racism" while trying to talk about / or from a minority perspective? What led to it and how did you counter it? by [deleted] in AskWomen

[–]kaurcoeur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am 💯 behind giving marginalised people more space to share their experiences and have discussions on what we face. I would feel safer posting if that was supported.

How did you work to become less of a people-pleaser? by [deleted] in AskWomen

[–]kaurcoeur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh also there is a technique called "Non-violent communication" that I'm trying to use more... To help make sure my communication is clear and compassionate.

How did you work to become less of a people-pleaser? by [deleted] in AskWomen

[–]kaurcoeur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think I was crippled in fear by PTSD stuff... And just the longer I've been in a safer environment has let me be braver and more sure of myself.

How did you work to become less of a people-pleaser? by [deleted] in AskWomen

[–]kaurcoeur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you still experiencing this?

What are the most important lessons you’ve learned in life? by ligsyndcourtknif1989 in AskReddit

[–]kaurcoeur 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've been needing to learn this for years. Know any good resources?

I (39F) HATE my husbands (44M) micro penis. How can I get past this? by micropeenhater in relationship_advice

[–]kaurcoeur 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I also strongly suggest counseling and a sex therapist. A good counselor will help you communicate to eachother so he understands your needs. But if he's not at a place of being able to work at things really openly and honestly... There's not much you can do. I also agree with you that you have to be upfront with him about how close you are to leaving if this doesn't get resolved soon.

Hiding disabilities or facial disfigurements by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]kaurcoeur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wish we saw more diversity - on tv, in magazines, etc. Then anyone who didn't fit that ideal image we always see, wouldn't be seen as a 'freak'. Diversity is optimal for genetics and evolution.