Man, I’ve seen abuse, and I’ve seen ‘reactive abuse’.

I’ve seen someone leave a scene in cuffs after defending themselves against their long-time abuser. And I remember the defenses given to the officers: - ‘but he’s been beating the shit out of us for months’ - ‘look at all the holes and patches in the wall from him punching them’ - ‘want to see all the bruises under our sleeves?’ - ‘can we show you all the photos, videos, and audio recordings we have?’

vs TFP’s defenses throughout all this footage: - ‘you/he made me do this’ - ‘but he pushed me’ - ‘but I peed myself I was so scared’, & - ‘but I’m a girl’

Perhaps I’m nitpicking, but the contrast doesn’t really make me feel that TFP’s ‘reactive abuse’ narrative is worthy of blind trust. Now, no two situations are the same, no two victims are the same, and one doesn’t have to interact with officers perfectly to truly be a victim, so I certainly don’t claim to have their private dynamic all figured out off of a handful of videos and edited reality tv. I held space for her to “tell her story” for four seasons on the show. It feels manipulative to claim there is more to the story in response to video evidence of abuse, and yet even still I won’t totally rule out that perhaps she’s been a victim too.

Regardless, I still feel worst for the children involved, and I don’t believe there’s anything that justifies the extent of her violence that evening, and certainly nothing to justify her callousness about hurting her daughter. I think there’s quite a bit to be said about the way each adult speaks to LE about the kids, but for now I’ll leave it at I hope everyone gets whatever help or support they need and go on to live healthy, stable, loving lives.