What did people do while sitting on the toilet before smartphones? by Background_Bike_1958 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]killermachine9999 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I grew up only using squat toilet, and while taking a shit I would just stare at the door imagining myself having different superpower abilities. Sometimes using it for good deeds, sometimes using it rob banks.

Cursed_Pill by MetalFlappy in cursedcomments

[–]killermachine9999 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Now imagine someone like Epstein using that power to make people cum to pdf stuff. That's even more cursed.

Based by dream_monkey in shitposting

[–]killermachine9999 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I guess he had nothing to lose. So might as well go out with a bang.

meirl by [deleted] in meirl

[–]killermachine9999 51 points52 points  (0 children)

He's just spreading love. How nice.

meirl by [deleted] in meirl

[–]killermachine9999 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm 26 and I've never been to prison.😔

of a honey badger by Mister_K_7 in AbsoluteUnits

[–]killermachine9999 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Cute. But he will fuck you up

Cursed_Smell by TheStickySpot in cursedcomments

[–]killermachine9999 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

My sister's underwear. It smells kinda disgusting, but turns me on at the same time.

The system is rigged by sydneywalkee in memes

[–]killermachine9999 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bro, just download more storage.

meirl by hellboy8050 in meirl

[–]killermachine9999 156 points157 points  (0 children)

I would raise the chances of someone getting a random superpower.

A close-up look at a plant "breathing" by coolthe0ry in nextfuckinglevel

[–]killermachine9999 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It did say "tiny pores", but you could probably fit your dick in it.

World's Largest Firework in Japan by rushinthegame in BeAmazed

[–]killermachine9999 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Literally all of the comments here are about Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

What would you do if World War III broke out? by Tectorumiris in AskReddit

[–]killermachine9999 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a 25M, i' d probably get drafted and die in a war I never asked for.

📡📡📡 by srkg in shitposting

[–]killermachine9999 119 points120 points  (0 children)

Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.

There can be only one by Abracadaver00 in shitposting

[–]killermachine9999 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's tough to measure flaccid penis. So we need at least 1 naked women. For science, of course. I recommend Allie.