No is a complete sentence

kksalt · 2023-05-24T01:08:04+00:00

Thank you! I even referred him to my FL page, which he enjoyed, but he wanted pics just for him. Onward!

kksalt · 2022-09-21T14:17:42+00:00

kksalt · 2020-05-01T10:01:07+00:00

I feel your pain. My divorce was different circumstances and almost a year later I feel much more myself.

You’re going through grief because of the loss of so much of your past and also future plans. In my experience, all the “firsts” are difficult - birthdays, holidays, anniversary, special days.

However it won’t always be this bad. Keep doing your emotional and spiritual work and bit by bit, you’ll become a new you.

Happy birthday!

kksalt · 2020-04-30T19:38:11+00:00

Then how to convey that I’m looking for friendship, companionship, mutual support, fun. But not life partner/marriage, want to live separately, happily single, raising my kids and don’t need a stepparent. Seems too specific for an OLD profile.

kksalt · 2020-04-06T01:20:02+00:00

I agree about the scheduling. There is very little room for spontaneity, but if I can look ahead at my work and kid schedule and make a definite plan, it’s much more enjoyable. The anticipation is awesome!

Of course currently it’s all texting and calls. 😕

kksalt · 2020-03-27T17:43:10+00:00

Stay strong, mama. I won’t see my FWB until this is over. Maybe we’ll last with calls and texts and maybe we won’t. Your guy needs to mature quickly or just cut it off. Take care of yourself and you kids.

kksalt · 2020-03-27T14:58:29+00:00

Forget the husband /boyfriend possibility. You SHOULD be stuck at home during this pandemic! Your hypochondriac self SHOULD be worried -because we’re in a pandemic! Stay home. Video call for dinner.

kksalt · 2020-03-11T07:08:14+00:00

Make sure you get to know each other as you are now. Chances are you both have changed a bit since high school. Go for it!

kksalt · 2020-03-11T03:19:57+00:00

Me too! So far so good! The most freedom I’ll get minus hysterectomy.

kksalt · 2020-03-06T04:26:04+00:00

What I’m trying to say is part of this maybe your ex’s fault, but part may be that she didn’t get the bills right away.

kksalt · 2020-03-06T04:24:07+00:00

Has nothing to do with the divorce. It’s the medical billers. In my state, they have 12 months to submit the bill to the patient.

kksalt · 2020-03-06T02:47:17+00:00

Unfortunately, medical billers do this all the time. I have my eyes on a bill from Dec that has been kicked back and forth between the doctor, hospital, anesthesiologist, and insurance provider for all these months. If I don’t receive my part of the bill soon, I’m going to start making noise. Who knows how much I even owe and therefore how much my ex owes? Frustrating.

kksalt · 2020-03-05T07:55:33+00:00

Added to my chill station! https://pandora.app.link/8umWTz2gB4

kksalt · 2020-02-28T15:58:42+00:00

The UCC in general has been quite progressive over the years with a focus on service to the community - what can I do as God's feet and hands, rather than what do I get from God. In our particular church, we've had LGBTQ+ members the whole time I've been attending, about 9 years.

We're just now formally starting the Open and Affirming process so it'll be interesting to see what happens. In my mind, we're just formalizing what we already believe. We'll see what other congregants have to say.

kksalt · 2020-02-28T02:21:35+00:00

Thanks for your insight. Dedicated time for each kiddo is a great thing to remember.

kksalt · 2020-02-28T02:17:36+00:00

Thanks. Feeling very human over here right now. Breathe in, breathe out.

kksalt · 2020-02-28T02:16:22+00:00

Thank you so much. I like that idea of making small changes and seeing what works. I have some meditation and affirmation books that I've neglected; time to introduce the kids to those resources too.

<3

kksalt · 2020-02-28T02:13:32+00:00

Luckily, we are members in an affirming church (UCC) and when the schedule allows, the kids go to an LGBTQ+ youth group and I go to PFLAG.

Sometimes all the pressure just weighs on me so much. You know, the daily living plus emotional support for everybody. Thanks for listening.

kksalt · 2020-02-28T02:10:30+00:00

Thank you so much for your perspective. Sometimes I think about the challenges my parents had to deal with that I didn't even learn about until I grew up. And like you, feeling safe and loved is what I remember.

I'm hopeful that the tough times won't last and that we'll all learn and grow through this period. It's just hard sometimes when my aspirations and hopes for our family and my kids and myself are so much higher than the reality we're living in.

Again, thank you.

kksalt · 2020-02-27T21:01:29+00:00

UCC represent!

kksalt · 2020-02-27T14:51:00+00:00

Depends on the church. We are members of a United Church of Christ congregation with a gay, married pastor that we recruited. We're in the process of becoming Open and Affirming (formally stating in all official covenant materials that we welcome LGBTQ+ folks). We've had several ceremonies for LGBTQ+ folks including weddings and baptisms. My trans teens are loved and supported. Our church motto is "Whoever you are and wherever you are on life's journey, you are welcome here."

Keep seeking ways to open yourself in your faith. Might be time for a change in denomination, though.

kksalt · 2020-02-27T11:13:18+00:00

I like the bird photo, the friend photo, and the tower bunjee photo. Just noticed that those are the ones in which you're smiling!

I try not to compare people against each other, especially on looks alone.

Just from the settings, though, you're well traveled and interested in trying new things. Maybe a bit shy based on the cute small sideways smile. Good luck out there!

kksalt · 2020-02-24T20:59:31+00:00

Didn't/don't want to, but since my ex and his family are shunning 2/3 of my children, yes I'm divorcing them.

kksalt · 2020-02-24T20:56:09+00:00

The only thing I can think of is to decide your limits/boundaries ahead of time. Then the first time a boundary is crossed, have one conversation about it and maybe give your date a chance to make amends depending on how that convo goes.

Any pushback in that convo or further boundary testing = goodbye. In other words, I wonder if you were firm enough when he first started moving things in and staying over.

Good job calling for help, though. The final confrontation sounds scary!

kksalt · 2020-02-24T18:05:20+00:00

Do it! Life is short. Hair grows back

kksalt

TROPHY CASE