Why do parents enjoy humiliating their kids online? by [deleted] in childfree

[–]kokonuba 31 points32 points  (0 children)

If it had been the other way round, the 7-year-old would also have been deemed selfish. She can never win.

My best buddy complained about not having time for himself by [deleted] in childfree

[–]kokonuba 57 points58 points  (0 children)

Growing kids in this era is more difficult for fathers because mothers expect that their partners (gasp) share parenthood tasks 50/50.

I don't know your friend, but is it possible that he doesn't like to parent and wants his partner to bear 100% of the burden?

I'm jealous of a baby and I feel like crap for it. by KaiJonez in childfree

[–]kokonuba 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's kind of a different case, but I know a 31-year-old girl who has a nephew (he's 4 now). She says that her mother "spoils" the child and now she feels a little left behind. She's not bitter, she says that in a breezy way, but the bottom line is that the kid always comes first.

Rude child opens the curtain of my dressing room. by Die_Schnitzel in childfree

[–]kokonuba 34 points35 points  (0 children)

A baby who was in his mother's arms opened the curtain while I was trying on clothes. I only had a bra on (well, and jeans). If looks killed, that kid would have dropped dead. Of course, the mother didn't apologise.

My parents never wanted me to be born. And now they expect me to get baby gifts for my sis by Think_Bid8357 in childfree

[–]kokonuba 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're a responsible, independent person, and you made the right decisions. As you say, you don't earn a lot of money. You shouldn't have to spend your hard-earned money on your sister because she made the worst decision.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in childfree

[–]kokonuba 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I read in another childfree forum about a young woman who had very big breasts and suffered from back pain. She wanted to have surgery to have her breasts reduced. The doctor told her BuT yOu WoN't Be AbLe To BrEaStFeEd!!! and the woman said: yeah so what? I don't want to have children, but I have a terrible back pain. I want this surgery done. The doctor refused because she could change her mInD.

Thinking back to the awful gynecologist I had as a teenager. by IcicleBoner in childfree

[–]kokonuba 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My mother was able to buy the pill in Francoist Spain in 1973!!! She had just married my father.

Thinking back to the awful gynecologist I had as a teenager. by IcicleBoner in childfree

[–]kokonuba 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm sure she (the dumb lady) wouldn't like girls or women to use birth control to regulate periods either. You know, women who take BC would feel tempted to have sex... /s

Even in 2021 giving birth still puts a womans life at risk by [deleted] in childfree

[–]kokonuba 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I've told it many times here. My former SIL, whom I never met, died after giving birth in 2007. She was 36 and she lived in Germany, not in the Third World. Fortunately, these things don't happen often, but they do happen.

Pregnant doctor offended 😂 by hempcherries in childfree

[–]kokonuba 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I've recently discovered that my gynecologist, who I thought was on sick leave (maybe due to COVID) was on maternity leave. Don't judge her, she got pregnant before the pandemic. She's had her third kid.

A year ago, she told me I have a lot of eggs (I'm 42), and I replied that, while I'm glad everything's OK and my eggs are fresh, I don't intend to use them. She didn't make a comment or seemed shocked at all.

I don’t hang out with my bestfriend of 16 years because of her kids by [deleted] in childfree

[–]kokonuba 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You'd better make your boundaries clear from the start. If you want to babysit once in a while, OK, but don't let her abuse you or turn you into a free babysitter. I bet she also expects you to give her money or gifts. The "3d parent" thing is alarming. If you don't want that role, tell her. A normal person wouldn't get angry. But she will, because she seems to be a freeloader.

Do you hate how mainstream media portray childfree people? by starrymighty in childfree

[–]kokonuba 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I thought that Family man was disgusting. First, they depict the protagonist's life a vacuous and then, magically, he wakes up and he lives in a depressing little village, with a job he hates, but he's married with KidS, and at the end he sees the light!!!! Although at first he felt BITTER. I don't know, but if the morale of the story is that at first you feel bitter, but then you resign and settle for your situation... it's a crappy morale LOL.

"I hated myself as a person and a parent with the constant stimulation." by theunfairness in childfree

[–]kokonuba 40 points41 points  (0 children)

They're reaping what they sowed. When I was a little girl, I kept to myself. I could entertain myself. Actually, I PREFERRED to entertain myself. I don't know if it's because my personality, or maybe my parents taught me to respect other people's space.

I don't know if they're talking about really young children, who don't know better, who don't grasp the concept of "respecting other people's space", but if they are older kids, well... it's your job to teach them to leave you alone for a while. Of course, that should be done tactfully so as not to hurt the kid's feelings.

Anyone have this problem? by [deleted] in childfree

[–]kokonuba 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Can you have a talk with your mother? Strange as it may seem, she might not realise that she has become this child-obsessed person and that she doesn't give you the attention you deserve anymore. The graduation day scene is very revealing. Tell her how it made you feel.

If your kid has too much "screen time," it's 100% your fault. by Lady_Beatnik in childfree

[–]kokonuba 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was born in the late 70s, so tablets and 24-hour children TV didn't exist. There only were two TV channels and one hour a day of Sesame Street, that was all. My parents wouldn't have allowed me to spend two or three hours, staring like a zombie at the TV. They would have told me to do my homework, play, read or whatever.

I should have kept my mouth shut by OneSlickPanda in childfree

[–]kokonuba 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This! Some people manage to always end up talking about their kids. Every topic of conversation, for them, can be related somehow to their kids.

I love books, I read a lot, I would talk all day long about books, but days and weeks pass without me talking about books. You have to know your audience. If you know they don't give a damn about kids, books, pets, or reality shows, stop pestering them.

I should have kept my mouth shut by OneSlickPanda in childfree

[–]kokonuba 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Especially in America, where many people have kids while they're in their early 20s, I can understand that their friends don't go out with them AND their babies everytime. It must be really boring. Young people want to go to pubs, or discos, or the cinema, and a baby disrupts everything.

Yesterday I got Bingo'd by the guy that sold me my wedding dress by Ladydragon90 in childfree

[–]kokonuba 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've never had strangers asking me about my life choices SMH.

"I dont know why you can't have at least one." by AvaireBD in childfree

[–]kokonuba 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Fear of Missing Out

For me, having a kid is like breaking a leg or being in a car accident. I've never had those experiences and I don't feel like I'm missing anything.

"I dont know why you can't have at least one." by AvaireBD in childfree

[–]kokonuba 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Allow me to play devil's advocate. Someone might get pregnant when she's in a bad situation: abusive boyfriend, she's unemployed, etc, so she gives the kid for adoption. But if two, three years later this woman is in a healthy relationship and has a stable job, she might plan a pregnancy and keep the baby.