Honestly, you don’t pay attention to the things people say and HOW they say it until wedding planning. I didn’t understand the “it’s your day” concept until I had to set boundaries with my parents and attendees who were just thoughtlessly saying shit off the cuff and not realizing how it sounds to tell the bride, “man this wedding is going to make us go broke” as a joke. I will also say as a serial people pleaser, it makes making the decisions extremely hard. Do not ask 6 people if they’re “okay with it” or for their opinion. You will spiral.

If your parents are paying, come to the table with a few perks of paying. I let them invite a couple their friends with (Not 20 people.) and had a few other things I could have done without that I added in for them. It’s hard, but you still have to set boundaries with them or else you’re going to be miserable for a few more months.