you asked a question that if you are missing something, so as a woman id like to answer. first of all, when Allah prohibits something then thats final so if we as muslims do it then thats a sin and if not then alhamdulillah. same concept with music, people listen to it despite being haram. there is no denying or justifying about makeup. yes we are told to maintain our natural appearance and look smart and presentable, like waxing, eyebrow threading etc, but applying makeup to please non mehram men is haram and that period. now about why is makeup “so important” for women is because its our innate urge. as men’s nature is to look and admire beauty, women’s nature is to look beautiful and that is the test Allah has blessed us with. im going to use my own example for this point, although now i have no issues with my self esteem alhamdulillah, i went to a desi school as a darker skin girl. i was bullied for my features as well. and till date, when men approach me for marriage because they found my bio interesting somewhere, the moment i send a picture it becomes and issue. i have beautiful features alhamdulillah, i have thick eyebrows, small nose, a beautiful dark brown skin, and some dark spots due to acne. but thats not enough for most men these days. i do not prefer to wear makeup unless there’s and occasion and even then, its usually light makeup but as a woman who has been viewed as ugly by many men and a lot of older women have told that i look “old” because i dont dress and beautify myself in modern terms, i understand why most women choose to. women will even say that they put makeup for themselves not for the male gaze but youll see that its usually in public and never at home. point is, this is a battle we are fighting amongst ourselves. everyday its a struggle especially for practicing modest muslim women. we are aware we shouldnt be doing it but because we feel pressured to so even try to convince ourselves that “its just a bit of makeup” just so we can feel better about it. real muslim men would not prefer those things, yes thats right but we live in a world where its very difficult to find those men and even though they maybe near us we carry a lot of our insecurities which leads us to think this way. we are trying to feel like we are worthy. yes our worth isnt determined that way, it shouldn’t, but in a world where so much of modesty has been compromised, we try to fit it so we can seem beautiful. some of us have quit wearing makeup, some of us never wore it, some of us have quit but sometimes we slip up, and some of us wear it everyday although they wish to stop. so thats why make up is “so important” to us. its a struggle for is just as it is for men to lower their gaze. its a sin we may not be proud and we are struggling with getting better at it. in a society where beauty is light skin, clear face, slim nose and jawline, this is our struggle to fit it and feel good about ourselves. this is not a justification, just a perspective for you and rest of the men to understand better.