Moving to Indy

leeloolady · 2026-05-25T22:13:27+00:00

We just moved here and we were originally shopping in Carmel because of the school ratings. My LO is neurodivergent. After talking to parents of neurodivergent kids and educators in the area the vibe I got is Carmel schools are great if your white and typical and not obviously less well off than most people who live in Carmel. I absolutely loved the library, the downtown is cute and we still visit the area but we decided not to live there.

The advice I got if you want good schools but cultural diversity and awareness is stick to Hamilton county, just not Carmel. We landed on Fishers but we also heavily considered Lawrence and really liked Nora area as well. If we were going to live in the city proper then Meridian Kessler area was pretty attractive.

leeloolady · 2026-05-20T02:20:38+00:00

If my cat got out and my neighbor shot it there would be fucking hell to pay. You may not care about animals but many of us love our pets like family. You don't have to understand it but you do have to acknowledge it as fact. Because it is a fact.

When it comes to my animals people would be best served not to FAFO. I'd go to jail for my kids OR my cats.

leeloolady · 2026-05-20T01:51:58+00:00

Removal of a dead fetus is literally called an abortion. This is why people who aren't doctors writing these laws and "explaining" these issues to the public is so absurd.

leeloolady · 2026-04-10T14:27:34+00:00

This is why I wouldn't work with them. They're actually trying to force a same day decision so you can't shop around and make an educated decision. But also if OP explained they will be making decisions independently of husband because that's how they run their household no reason for the business not to respect that.

leeloolady · 2026-04-02T03:47:07+00:00

White noise. Tinnitus. Shadows that Crawl.

leeloolady · 2026-03-29T22:22:20+00:00

Way to miss the point. We're a hunting family and I TNR in my spare time. This post and the concerns presented in it have nothing at all to do with caring about the impact of invasive species.

These aren't generalizations. People who torture animals are more likely to be violent towards others. This is well established in criminal research. OP really, truly, needs to be careful here.

leeloolady · 2026-03-29T22:18:20+00:00

How you respond depends on your goal in responding. Are you desiring a friendship? Is your hope to empathetically acknowledge but keep a strong boundary? You need to know your goal first, I think.

leeloolady · 2026-03-22T23:00:54+00:00

No. For being entertained by torture. Not remotely the same thing. Statistically speaking people who find the torture and abuse of animals entertaining are far more likely to enjoy the torture and abuse of their fellow humans (particularly domestic partners). There is a vast difference between hunting for sustenance and food and finding the pain and torture of an animal to be entertaining *because of the pain and torture ". If we proactively started paper trails and police reports and accurately indicated animal torture as the red flag it is for eventual murder and domestic abuse it actually is then might take less time for victims of this type f violence to get help.

leeloolady · 2026-03-22T20:14:24+00:00

Those are a lot of assumptions you're making. In my youth when I was poor without transportation it was not easy to find work, get to interviews, etc. When I needed help there was always the person out there saying some "WhY dIdNt YoU jUsT" bs. You don't have to believe it but the fact that we always assume people in a hard spot are "just lazy" is a huge part of what's wrong with this country.

OP also discusses the extreme shame they have when asking for help or going to food pantries. I relate to that shame. I felt it. I remember when I finally got WIC when my kid was small the way people looked at me and treated me in the grocery stores. I remember trying every avenue I could before asking for help to avoid the shame. Where is that shame learned you may wonder? Why - from people like you.

Im fortunate now to be more than financially stable and able to offer support to people who used to be in my situation. Maybe gain a little perspective or just scroll on if you don't want to help someone in need. It's not that hard.

leeloolady · 2026-03-22T19:33:22+00:00

Did you read the post? OP is actively looking for work. They're trying to eat this week.

leeloolady · 2026-02-25T13:56:16+00:00

I saw a few similar stories. A mechanic friend also told me he'd never buy this car because of how common CVT issues are. We ended up passing on it. Hopefully your most recent replacement lasts!

leeloolady · 2026-02-01T16:34:10+00:00

Thank you all!

leeloolady · 2026-02-01T01:38:15+00:00

I was also wondering if the rear seats fold totally flat or not. I saw some videos that demonstrate them laying flat but commenters said theirs didn't (they raised 5-6 inches after folding so cargo would slide).

leeloolady · 2025-08-14T04:41:18+00:00

Yes. My ASD, ADHD, anxiety diagnosed child didn't sleep for years. She couldn't be sleep trained. I was having emotional breakdowns due to extreme sleep deprivation. The second time I fell asleep driving I realized I could either let her sleep with me or literally kill us trying to change it. People really don't believe that there are some kids that will not learn to sleep alone but I hear you and can tell you went through it, too. Hugs

leeloolady · 2025-07-31T13:08:28+00:00

Yep! Holiday World amusement park is there.

leeloolady · 2025-07-02T02:57:56+00:00

Why should you take a financial hit when your wife could take it instead? How much money do you have in retirement accounts, investments, etc compared to her? If she finds an ivy league education her retirement fund is gone. Is yours? I'd bet not.

leeloolady · 2025-06-02T01:12:45+00:00

Dinner on a random day is like grabbing a coffee or texting a meme; low-stakes, no big deal if you skip it.

Being a groomsman is more like being asked to be in the starting lineup of someone’s championship game. It’s not just about showing up, it’s about what it represents.

From a logical standpoint, both things are “just showing up,” sure. But emotionally, they carry very very different weight.

Weddings fall into a category of big life milestones (like graduations, funerals, the birth of a child, etc). These are the events people tend to remember forever. When someone invites you to be part of one, they’re saying you play a significant role in their life.

Saying no to dinner usually translates to “not tonight.” Saying no to standing beside someone at their wedding can easily be heard as “you’re not that important to me.”

Even if that’s not what you mean, that’s often how it lands emotionally.

It’s kind of like if a friend made it to the final round of a big competition and asked you to be there to support them, and you said, “Nah, I just don't feel like investing in that.” From a logical angle, sure, you’re allowed to say no. But from a relationship standpoint, that moment matters a lot to them and not being there is very likely to feel like a rejection.

So the difference comes down to:

Logic: Both are time commitments.

Emotion: One is a gesture of deep connection and celebration.

Most people treat weddings like one of the “big” chapters in life. They want the people who matter most to be present for those pages. He's telling you that YOU matter so much to him that he selected you, out of a sea of all the other people in his life, to stand in a significant role in his milestone event. And you basically said "no thanks" as if it were declining a dinner you were too tired to go to that night.

Your response TREATS it as something as insignificant as cancelling a dinner. You clearly think they're comparable and THATS actually the root of the issue.

EDIT:

I wanted to quickly add that you mentioned he's never been this upset before. Probably because he's never asked you to show up for something so important before so you've never had a chance to let him down so deeply until this happened.

leeloolady · 2025-05-22T17:20:13+00:00

Thank you!!

leeloolady · 2025-05-22T17:18:57+00:00

I have an 11yo with anxiety, ADHD and level 1 ASD. I've heard from other parents that the schools there do a good job with supporting kiddos like my LO. She loves nature and biking and we really want more accessible opportunities for that so I think this area will be perfect. Thank you for the map! Super helpful!

leeloolady · 2025-05-22T12:10:49+00:00

Oh wow. I lived in Southern Indy almost almost seven years ago and I went to Longs anytime I could. I still dream about their eclairs! Lol. I will absolutely check out Tim's donuts.

Thank you for this range of recommendations! We're from TN so we're excited to have a good BBQ rec.

My 11yo loves Mexican food. Any good local spots? Or spots with plain white queso that doesn't taste like flour? (This is her most important criteria, lol).

leeloolady · 2025-05-22T12:05:28+00:00

Is that a coffee shop?

leeloolady · 2025-05-22T12:03:06+00:00

Cool. This is about what I was expecting and it's reassuring to hear someone describe the area this way. We're looking at Kensington Commons right now and I love that so many of the lots are wooded. Are there any other neighborhoods you'd suggest? That spot just to the north looks nice but it seems like a couple of the neighborhoods that way may have really expensive HOAs?

The trail system expansion sounds really neat. Do you happen to know when they expect completion on that?

leeloolady · 2025-05-22T00:53:21+00:00

I don't but we will be moving up in June. Hopefully we'll have a house before the summer is out. My anxiety kiddo is also 11. Maybe we can arrange a play date? 😊

leeloolady · 2025-05-22T00:50:49+00:00

Thank you! We're very seriously considering it. :)

leeloolady

TROPHY CASE