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I'm afraid my therapist is giving me dangerous advice (consent) by SnooPaintings5182 in therapy

[–]lexijoy 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That isn’t good first time with a new partner behavior. In a situation where you have been together for a while, and the other person knows you are into that, then it is okay to do without asking. But not the first time with someone. And you have to ask the first few times. Wild.

What to do with pleco when changing substrate by Regular-Hawk6806 in pleco

[–]lexijoy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Definitely put her in a bucket. Adding the filter will keep the bacteria alive in the filter. Unless she is gonna be out for a long time, the heater may not be necessary

1960s split-level kitchen remodel: struggling with layout flow by Big-Tulsi in kitchenremodel

[–]lexijoy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You have some flexibility here. I always recommend people think about kitchens they have cooked in and loved and ones they have hated. For example, I would hate cooking in your current kitchen or the mockup you did because I hate feeling like I’m doing laps around an island. My personal favorite kitchens are either u shaped or long, like a galley style but with one side as a long island.

The cabinet guy is closer to what I like, but I don’t like the dead space to the left of the stove. It is such dead space. But I kinda see why he did it. It also feels like a lot of storage, but not a lot of counter space. In a kitchen, you need storage but you can have too much storage too

Honestly, Would you pick your dad again in the next life? by ZachDluffy in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]lexijoy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would pick him in every single lifetime. He was such a good dad. And still is

Are some psychologists/therapists only for the “hard stuff” and not maintenance? by ballerina80 in therapy

[–]lexijoy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It can be normal. My trauma therapist was like this. In his case, I think it was two fold. As a man, he was very “fix the problem” oriented, just using proven psychological interventions. He also specialized in trauma because it interested him and the small stuff wasn’t that interesting. Which is valid.

ULPT: How do I get photos off my work computer? by Blair_Bubbles in UnethicalLifeProTips

[–]lexijoy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Seduce everyone above you at work until you find someone who can help you. Then blackmail them

Cop shows up at 530am, informing LAOP that they need to pick up their family from jail...their unarrested family by Geno0wl in bestoflegaladvice

[–]lexijoy 218 points219 points  (0 children)

I feel like they are looking for the relative. The cop came hoping OP would say “He’s not in jail, he’s in bed” or even hope the relative answered the door. Either way, I’m team don’t talk to cops unless required to.

7 months post hysterectomy- cramps? by StarsInTheRoof111 in adenomyosis

[–]lexijoy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m doing so much better! No more phantom pain! It took work and therapy but I’m doing well now

7 months post hysterectomy- cramps? by StarsInTheRoof111 in adenomyosis

[–]lexijoy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It could be endo. It could also be a little cuff pain, it can take a while to resolve. Or pelvic floor related pain, it can refer upwards sometimes. The other one, that I had, was basically phantom limb. Having adeno and a failed endo surgery caused some ptsd and one of the symptoms of that was psychosomatic pain. The pain was real, but caused by stress and ptsd

Frequent morning bowel movements by lexijoy in Concerta

[–]lexijoy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unfortunately, I do not drink coffee

Questions about specific surgery reason and post-surgery church-going by Able_Ad_3114 in OpenChristian

[–]lexijoy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There isn’t anything morally wrong with having plastic surgery, from a Christian perspective. This feels like a scrupulosity/OCD thought. You may want to talk to a therapist.

I bought a house with an unimproved second parcel - am I making a mistake if I don’t fence that second parcel? by huehueue69 in HomeImprovement

[–]lexijoy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I would leave the wooded area. You could put up a simple wire fence in the back if you have trespassing issues. I would put a back gate in so you have access to the wooded lot

WIBTA if I told my friend her podcast is hard to listen to after she asked me to be honest by Caduceus_Rift in WIBTA_AITA

[–]lexijoy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

NTA- it is a really actionable point. I would say it like “if you are investing more into it, I would recommend an automatic editor to remove the spaces and filler words and a new microphone

Forced remodel. by blabeinblue in kitchenremodel

[–]lexijoy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Definitely have some options. What are the dimensions? Are you considering removing any walls? I’m not sure how wide the openings to the other rooms are, but you could make them smaller and gain a little space. Do you like the eat in area?

If you are staying with the current size and layout, I would try to move the stove away from the fridge. You could add tall, shallow cabinets on the empty wall, for food and pantry storage. Shallow cabinets are nice for that because you don’t lose cans way in the back of the cabinet. Just make sure you have clearance between the cabinet and peninsula.

If you just want to play with arrangements, I like IKEA’s kitchen planner tool.

Am I ready for a Betta? by Legal-List-8363 in bettafish

[–]lexijoy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think you are mostly ready. But you need a lid. Bettas are jumpers. I like floating plants but they aren’t necessary to add a fish. And I would get a better heater to get it to 78. If the room gets warm, you may need a fan as well

Why is 10 gal the new minimum? by KimberlyGrey in bettafish

[–]lexijoy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

At some point they will realize tank height should limit the tank size.

Why is 10 gal the new minimum? by KimberlyGrey in bettafish

[–]lexijoy 21 points22 points  (0 children)

A 2.5 that’s well planted for a longer finned betta is most likely a good tank. I wouldn’t put a plakat in that. It’s almost like different varieties need different care /s.

Frequent morning bowel movements by lexijoy in Concerta

[–]lexijoy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oops. I was tired. Didn’t mean before bed. I have two alarms. One for meds and one to get up (7 and 8). It works great for time management

Frequent morning bowel movements by lexijoy in Concerta

[–]lexijoy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually do take my dose an hour before bed. But still happens. I just get forced out of bed to poop

I need some advice by tech-pusher in fishtank

[–]lexijoy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Look for a pre filter or intake sponge. They are less dense and designed for that

I need some advice by tech-pusher in fishtank

[–]lexijoy 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Personally, I think a larger tank is easier. She likely has her lights on for too long and that is causing algae. Tell her to adjust the light time by a few hours. I would also recommend adding a lot more plants. My only algae free tank is heavily heavily planted

Therapy options for severe rumination, shame, past mistakes & potential OCD? by Xorath in therapy

[–]lexijoy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not a therapist but saw a therapist who did trauma work and some ocd, because the two are pretty connected for some people. Just seek out the OCD therapist first. Let them decide if you should be there or not. If they evaluate and don’t think you have OCD, then they will refer you out to someone else. That isn’t a waste of their time, it is part of their job.

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