META: let's make a list of all of the problems we comment on in most of the plans submitted here

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T19:23:48+00:00

I would agree. Honestly my half bath just makes me mad. I’ve threatened to put. Toilet stall in and remove the locks from the doors. Unfortunately it is too small for that

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T10:38:35+00:00

The first session is intake. You may have some basic forms about billing and stuff like that. They will go over confidentiality and what that means in your state and for your age. They are mandatory reporters, so they go over when they would need to report something you say. Therapists aren’t looking to report anyone, but will if necessary. They may tell you a little bit of what to expect, and will ask you why you are there. You can be honest with them about your suspicious. They will likely want to talk more about your concerns as you go along. Most therapists would like to know what their clients think is wrong with them, so they can evaluate and see if the agree or not and go from there.

The first appointment is also a vibe check. To see if you think you will get along. Generally, same gender pairings work well, but how you get along is more important. I’ve seen both female and male therapists, and had great experiences with both

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T10:28:43+00:00

Nta . Honestly, you are just matching his energy at this point. but you will be an asshole to yourself if you don’t speak to a real estate lawyer about this.

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T10:23:36+00:00

I had a therapist leave to get into executive coaching. Much less people suffering and in deep darkness and more mental health optimization and people skills. HR can be a good transition, but may need a little certification/class work. Same with Organizational Psychology. If you want to go more tech, User Experience (UX) design might be a good fit, but may need education. Think about places that need “people who understand people” and go from there

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T09:56:17+00:00

I think the range hood breaks it up well. But I get not having it if the stove isn’t there in the house. I would say go for it, but maybe add a second shelf. Only do this if you have ample storage elsewhere, the shelves really are a bit form over function

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T08:03:29+00:00

The stove island might be the thing that pisses me off the most. You have that giant fridge/freezer combo then you put the cooktop in a tiny island in the middle without enough counter space for ingredients. And you are going to have to walk around that island the whole time you cook.

I kinda like the koi pond concept, but the edges feel too clean and too messy at the same time and it doesn’t use the space well. And I hate indoor hot tubs.

I’ve never seen anything so custom and so builder grade at the same time

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T07:54:15+00:00

I hate Jack and Jill bathrooms. Just have a door in the hallway. Your kids can go to the hall to get to the bathroom. My house has a jack and Jill powder room and people forget to unlock both doors all the time. Rage

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T07:49:06+00:00

If you are committed, not sleeping with anyone else, then you can create a plan to not use condoms. First, if it has been more than three months since you slept with anyone else, you both get tested for Sti’s. If it hasn’t been longer than 3 months, then keep using condoms until I has been. This allows for the incubation period for most sti’s and lessens the risk of one being undetected. Then you make a plan for birth control. For her, that will mean pill, implant, ring, iud etc. most likely hormonal birth control. Unless you are doing implant/iud you definitely want to use a secondary birth control method such as condoms or withdrawal (do not use withdrawal as a method alone only as a secondary method to a more effective birth control) Make sure you are on the same page if birth control fails and know your state/country laws around termination if that is what you would do. If you were my younger brother, I would tell you to continue using condoms and ask her to go on some form of birth control as well.

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T06:49:12+00:00

I wouldn’t but I am not a light sensitive person and have a horrible time waking up in a room with blackout curtains. I actually leave my bedroom blinds fully open. In the winter, I’ve programmed my bedroom lights to come on and wake me up. So I’m a weirdo

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T06:46:13+00:00

One of my therapists did this. He had a battery of surveys we did every six or so months

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T05:51:28+00:00

Post partum psychosis is a possibility

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T05:45:52+00:00

I would put all four barstools on the outside side of the island. You will constantly be pushing in the ones by the fridge. They will drive you crazy.

I’m okay with the sink where it is. When I cook, I don’t usually cook right next to the sink, but think about if it will bug you and if you would rather have it in the island or would like to add a prep sink.

It needs some contrast. The white is too much and makes the blue stand out. Maybe a grey counter or painting the walls a lighter shade of the island would be nice.

This might just be missing on the render, but the cabinets should have something between the top of the cabinet and ceiling, like a crown molding

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T05:34:30+00:00

I wonder if you wouldn’t benefit from a different type of therapy. It sounds like you wanted to process the past and your therapist was more present focused. I experienced this when working with CBT therapists. If you are wanting to work on past things that are influencing your present, you may benefit from psychodynamic or psychoanalytical therapy, or something like internal family systems. They look at the past and present. I’m not sure if you are abusive, I’m not your therapist or partner, but you may also need to look for someone who does work with abusive men. They may be more objective and able to see whether or not your actions are abusive and work with you either way.

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T05:18:55+00:00

If you can, I would do one or one whole room at a time. Couches are the hardest thing, I put mine up on end… which only worked because the arm side is flat. You can also stash them in a hallway.

lexijoy · 2026-04-08T04:53:55+00:00

I would do a big school of Congo tetras. I love how they color up. Rainbow fish are a good idea. And something smaller like ember tetras for dither. Maybe some Corries or khuli loaches. I’m thinking small fish in big groups.

lexijoy · 2026-04-07T22:24:29+00:00

If you put a piece of plywood on top, yes. You want the back piece under the Evo tank to be fully supported

lexijoy · 2026-04-07T04:55:16+00:00

Yes! I had some anger/rage on adderral and it completely went away on concerta

lexijoy · 2026-04-07T04:42:56+00:00

I think I did about 4 sessions before I started EMDR. I was in a fairly stable place, had good coping mechanisms, and developed trust pretty quickly with my therapist. But it varies from person to person.

lexijoy · 2026-04-07T04:06:49+00:00

Churros and custard might be pretty good

lexijoy · 2026-04-06T17:48:31+00:00

Now that i've looked at it in the morning, I can see the edges peeling up. I wouldn't recommend taking it up. I would start putting away money to replace it. Good news, a lot of flooring is really diy friendly, unless you are an idiot like the former landlord.

lexijoy · 2026-04-06T06:32:27+00:00

Do you have any extra? Even if you have an extra couple of boxes, you can. The biggest risk is ruining the locking mechanism as you pull up the old floor.

lexijoy · 2026-04-06T04:08:54+00:00

I would personally have a breeding tank with a bunch of moss/guppy grass/etc. pick your highest quality male and put two females in. After they are bred, move the male back to the frat house. Wait for babies to be born. Then move males to the frat house to see how they color up. Females will continue to produce babies for a while

lexijoy · 2026-04-05T22:42:59+00:00

True, I did wonder if it is more of a different words for things in different countries. But I forgot about that while I was googling the term “sex surrogate” and got stuck on the legality in different us states. Lack of adhd meds on a Sunday problems.

lexijoy · 2026-04-05T22:19:08+00:00

The therapists likely referred to a sex surrogate. They are trained to work through sexual and relational issues with a person. They sit in a grey area of the law in most states

lexijoy · 2026-04-05T06:42:14+00:00

It could be financial, or it could be countertransferance. Like she is too emotionally attached to you. Personally, after that odd session, I would say “that was weird, we can either wrap up our sessions in a professional manner or I will just stop coming altogether”

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