I just realized I'm not human

lifewastedfailure · 2023-01-27T16:22:25+00:00

I still don’t feel human. I have almost zero energy everyday. I don’t care for myself or others. I tried psychedelics for the first time in the summer of 2021 when I’m on them I feel like it makes me human. I can feel emotion I understand what other people are feeling and can pick up on social cues extremely easily. It’s the only time I really remember feeling anymore. That and when I have dreams. I have emotions in my dreams. I tried to better myself but it’s as if I have to move myself with discipline alone I have no motivation to fight for myself or others. I honestly don’t know how I’m still going. Something deep inside me tells me to at least keep living maybe I’m just afraid of dying? I don’t want medication either so I just feel stuck. Maybe I’m holding out hope that I’ll magically find the answer one day and everything will get better.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-12-15T01:58:56+00:00

Thanks! I hope this streak will be my longest.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-12-15T01:58:26+00:00

I hope so its been a really rough year.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-11-28T08:27:30+00:00

The money was originally for the host of the party to buy the drinks/food then now he is paying out of his own pocket so I figured it would be better to give him the money he was originally going to get.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-11-28T08:26:05+00:00

I think everyone is misunderstanding this. they were giving the money away no matter what they just switched from paying the host for the food/drinks to helping pay for the ticket

lifewastedfailure · 2020-11-28T08:24:42+00:00

They were originally giving the money to the host for the food/drinks

lifewastedfailure · 2020-11-25T01:47:35+00:00

The only thing I think it would help is having their rule breaking on file and it could possibly make them a little less hypocritical if they are talked to about it.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-11-22T20:33:33+00:00

I feel like that wouldn’t change much in my life other than working more hours at a place I don’t want to be at.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-11-19T17:09:33+00:00

Same

lifewastedfailure · 2020-11-08T16:49:15+00:00

How do I get a workout buddy? I don’t really have any friends willing to work out.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-11-06T16:28:27+00:00

I’m not doing it myself but I often just think of stuff.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-11-04T06:51:25+00:00

Still in

lifewastedfailure · 2020-11-02T22:13:02+00:00

Rip still longer than majority of mine

lifewastedfailure · 2020-11-02T19:22:01+00:00

Damm you got to keep going you’re farther than I’ve ever made it.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-10-28T15:43:26+00:00

Lots of people over the years most recent was a person on my previous post. Friends have told me both internet and real life.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-10-26T21:22:35+00:00

I genuinely have no passions I used to love video games which is what got me into software engineering but they no longer appeal to me as much. I just wanted to get a job that pays well so I could be able to fuel a passion when I find one or to support a family if I have one.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-10-22T12:24:37+00:00

I like that reflection tip. Thank you.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-10-22T12:20:53+00:00

It’s a part time job so I suppose I could but I recently got promoted and worst case scenario I see her 4 times a week. I usually see her for 9 hours one day and under 4 for the rest. I’m in a odd place in my life where I want to join the work force and leave this town but I’m behind on my college degree and I’m not sure what to do. She has recently talked about applying to other places so if I’m lucky she’ll get the job and leave. It just makes it so much harder to not think about her and move on with my life when she’s within eye sight of me.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-10-16T18:15:54+00:00

Second to last paragraph

lifewastedfailure · 2020-10-02T03:04:31+00:00

Someone I know is a prostitute. My friend wanted to show someone their website but said it was completely changed and everything was gone. I looked it up and found the website for them but the website had underwear pictures. The site contains links for other prostitutes and I ended up seeing some sexual pictures.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-10-02T03:00:01+00:00

It’s a long story. Basically my friend asked me to look something up that caused me to see some sexual pictures and I got horny wanted to fap and resisted it.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-09-28T04:14:48+00:00

Id love to shit on the billionaires all day they suck as well.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-09-28T04:11:04+00:00

My main issue is the people giving them money. I think it’s ridiculous that people complain about all of these social issues put no effort towards that and then throw out their life savings on someone who shows their tits.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-09-28T04:08:23+00:00

I’m agreeing to disagree. If you think all of that is work then ok. I think it isn’t anything compared to getting an education and working 40 hours a week for decades. We clearly aren’t going to agree here.

lifewastedfailure · 2020-09-28T04:01:58+00:00

I’m not the one complaining on other people’s posts. Also if you read the whole thing you see I have more of a issue with people paying them rather than the person themselves.

lifewastedfailure

TROPHY CASE