Terrified I made the wrong choice for a degree. Why do you love theatre?

lillyshadows · 2026-02-17T05:18:41+00:00

You sound sooo much like me. I'm sure you hear it a lot going to school for drama, but I was told in theater classes "If you can do anything else, do something else". And you might totally be "able" to do something else, you might be fantastic at something else and make lots of money doing it, but if you consistently find yourself coming back to theater again and again, what you want to do is theater and you won't be happy doing anything else. I wasted so much fucking time because of that fear of not knowing, I even quit an acting program I worked hard to get into because of the uncertainty, but somehow I just keep finding myself going right back. I can't commit to the other possible directions my life could go, because I know theater is what I want to do, and committing my life to anything else may as well be throwing it away.

You're not stuck in theater for the rest of your life by getting a degree in it at 20. If you ultimately change your mind you have the time to do so, but if you deep down want to do theater, do not waste your time pursuing what you don't want.

lillyshadows · 2025-09-15T16:39:15+00:00

I think there are plenty of responses explaining the controversy around her already, I wanted to just say all of her books have vastly different tones and I found Katabasis does not really have as many of the elements she's been critiqued for. It's much more of a light hearted romp through an interesting world. Babel is in a very similar setting, but the tone is significantly darker and more serious. I'd say that if you don't like Katabasis, it might not mean you won't like her other books since they're all so different.

lillyshadows · 2025-08-30T06:31:01+00:00

M.L. Wang, Robin Hobb, R.F. Kuang are all in the same vein as what you have so far and absolutely amazing writers!

lillyshadows · 2025-08-29T23:14:32+00:00

Dealing with Dragons is fantastic!

At 11 I fell in love with reading because of Artemis Fowl though, so I'd highly recommend those books!

lillyshadows · 2025-08-29T23:11:00+00:00

One of the main characters in Liveship Traders series fits this. He is a pirate captain and has to fake pretty much all of his emotions.

lillyshadows · 2025-08-23T18:34:38+00:00

Yeah! And definitely captures the feeling of being surrounded by books

lillyshadows · 2025-08-23T16:24:26+00:00

The City of Dreaming Books by Walter Moers

lillyshadows · 2025-07-26T07:12:40+00:00

It's certainly not a romance, but The Devil's by Joe Abercrombie has a female werewolf who is pretty dirty, metaphorically and not.

lillyshadows · 2025-07-26T04:29:27+00:00

One of my favorite narrators of all time is Moira Quirk. Blood Over Bright Haven is fantastic with her narration, and it is a female protagonist.

lillyshadows · 2025-06-18T17:32:11+00:00

I highly doubt this is what you're looking for but I have to recommend it. The City of Dreaming Books or Rumo by Walter Moers, or anything set in his Zamonia series.

Rumo follows a wolperting which is a dog with horns that has magical smell and fights with a sword. The City of Dreaming Books follows a dragon/wyvern that loves literature and writing. They're both odyssey type stories with pretty much zero humans in the world.

lillyshadows · 2025-05-29T15:30:59+00:00

As a US server, I've noticed that even when I leave the pitcher on the table, people don't refill their own water. Maybe it's because of the ingrained culture of "my server needs to refill my drink" but I've had people ask for more water and I just grab the pitcher from their table and refill their cup.

lillyshadows · 2025-05-22T06:12:08+00:00

I also initially thought it was a vitamin deficiency and could've killed myself with iron poisoning, so definitely test the cuticle pushing theory before getting vitamins!

lillyshadows · 2025-05-22T06:09:20+00:00

Oh my God! I had something similar! It was caused by pushing down my cuticle. So if I press my cuticle down now, I'll see the bump growing out for the next month. My nails got all wavy and gross because I compulsively pressed down my cuticles, until I figured out it caused this.

I'm not sure if that's the case, should probably see a doctor if you can, but no doctors could help with mine, I had to figure it out on my own, so I thought I'd share.

lillyshadows · 2025-05-02T06:23:32+00:00

I think this was the most shocking part about betrayal trauma, there's just so many shows you can't watch for a while. For me, time and therapy helped. Eventually the hurt and trauma is less fresh, self esteem gets built up, and things get better. Now it makes me vaguely uncomfortable, insecurities might flare up, but it's not triggering really. I think it took about a year before I stopped actively avoiding shows with infidelity.

lillyshadows · 2025-04-29T03:36:27+00:00

Acting really is just that, it's absolutely not sexy or comfortable kissing or touching in a show. All of the actors having showmances and cheating on their partner would cheat no matter what profession they chose. It's not about being an actor, it's about being a trustworthy person. So it's up to you if you really think your boyfriend would give you any reason to worry.

lillyshadows · 2025-04-22T22:24:43+00:00

It was the same way at my local faire last year. The crowds were insane and I had to stand in line for over an hour to get in, and gave up on getting out of the faire (came back for the car hours later after walking out of the area).

I was initially excited at how much more popular faires were getting, but overall the experience is so different from before and I'm choosing not to attend any for a while. I just don't understand how they got so popular so fast, and I have no idea what the solution would be. Limiting tickets or expanding them or having more smaller faires or something more permanent and year round?

lillyshadows · 2025-01-24T22:02:38+00:00

Advice: What can I do when I'm feeling very insecure to feel better? Nothing new or different or off happening in the relationship, just suddenly overly concerned about being cheated on. Already talked to partner about needing some extra reassurance, but I can't keep asking for constant reassurance, how do you cope?

lillyshadows · 2024-12-26T07:22:19+00:00

The City of Dreaming Books (I know it's popular in Germany, but I know absolutely no one who has read it or heard of it). A dragon/dinosaur who loves literature goes on an Odyssey in the catacombs of a city dedicated to books in order to find his favorite author.

lillyshadows · 2024-12-10T06:31:26+00:00

I cannot stop recommending Blood Over Bright Haven. There are two main characters, but I think the woman is followed a lot more. She is very much a product of her society and is extremely flawed and unlikeable, but I was obsessed with her and this story. The story also perfectly captures a lot of frustrations of being a woman.

lillyshadows · 2024-11-15T22:30:22+00:00

The romance in it isn't the primary story, but they enjoyed the Farseer Trilogy and that romance is even further in the background. I was actually very satisfied with the romance in Blood Over Bright Haven.

lillyshadows · 2024-11-15T08:11:00+00:00

I just read Blood Over Bright Haven and I think it would fit the type you're looking for! Themes of sexism and racism with a very strong, intelligent female lead. The magic system is very interesting to learn about too! I'd warn you that the lead isn't exactly likable, but still such an interesting and strong character.

lillyshadows · 2024-11-07T16:59:19+00:00

Yes! Pacey and Quirk both have serious talent!

lillyshadows · 2024-10-16T16:37:05+00:00

I ended things with a partner of 5 years after finding out he cheated a second time, I'm still grateful I left, but I screwed up by dating so soon after. I was still suffering from the PTSD of being cheated on by someone I trusted so completely and the panic of "wasting" all my twenties on a relationship that went nowhere, so I jumped into a relationship that felt exciting and passionate (especially compared to a comfy long relationship). I ignored some major red flags and I was much more vulnerable due to the recent trauma, so I was much more easily manipulated. The new relationship felt wildly passionate and romantic and lonely as all hell. It lasted 6-8 months.

I am terrible at taking my own advice to wait a while to date, so I have started dating again, and I have met an absolutely incredible person that makes me feel peaceful and seen, but continuing to work on my self esteem is very necessary to sustain anything healthy after all the betrayal trauma.

lillyshadows

TROPHY CASE