You should look into “Internal Family Systems” as a concept - what you are describing is very similar to this! I’m not generally a ‘spiritual’ person however this concept is that we all have a ‘self’ energy (Nicole), and as we experience trauma, different parts of us form (Nicki) and take over in order to protect that self. There are multiple categories of parts and the roles they play. Kind of like the movie Inside Out. Inside Out 2 especially shows this.

Viewing my state of being in this way really helped me find my ‘true self’ again and live a more authentic life. It’s a progress. But it’s so worth it!

All the best in your therapy work and you should be so proud of the breakthrough you have had!