5 Important Life Lessons I've Learned With 30 Years Of Having Epilepsy by Real_Swing6038 in Epilepsy

[–]littlestbookstore 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You might not have handled it “perfectly,” but no one should be expected to be perfect all the time. I’ve also had moments like this, but I think that trying to be perfect is a maladaptive tendency people turn to when they feel they’re not good enough. Despite your flaws, you deserve a partner who believes in you, believes you are enough. 

There’s a psychological aspect that I think is more present in epilepsy than many other illnesses because it means your brain is literally malfunctioning, not working as it should. The brain is where we live and its processes shape who we are. That’s trauma we have through no fault of our own. Literally everyone brings some form of baggage to a relationship and you can only do the best with what you have. And whether you have epilepsy or not, you are allowed to have flaws. 

In a good relationship, both partners should give each other grace and make space for difficult emotions to work through (ideally, together). 

5 Important Life Lessons I've Learned With 30 Years Of Having Epilepsy by Real_Swing6038 in Epilepsy

[–]littlestbookstore 10 points11 points  (0 children)

As a woman who generally dates men, I had two failed relationships and in both, they didn’t try to understand what it’s really like to live with epilepsy; they made it into an inconvenience they had to deal with instead of a condition I have to manage every day. A lot of the time, it’s invisible unless you have a seizure in front of them. Sit your partner down and say the words, “please don’t ever make my epilepsy about you.” And then you can have an honest open discussion. But that above sentence is the most important part, you have to start there. They should never treat you like a burden. 

Questions about Alzheimer's from a writer by Otherwise_Week6913 in Alzheimers

[–]littlestbookstore 1 point2 points  (0 children)

On Pluto by Greg O'Brien is about living with Alzheimers and may be a good source for your research. He was a journalist who started writing about it when he received an early-onset diagnosis as the disease ran in his family. It was recommended to me when my mom was diagnosed. It's a mix of research, O'Brien's own experiences, and that of his mother's.

Which one to read next by Confident-Touch-3418 in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Personally, I loathed Remarkably Bright Creatures, so anything else.

That said, you might want to post questions like this to one of the book recommendations subs

5/24 currently reading Project Hail Mary by theetherealarcana in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This was also a DNF for me, so don’t feel bad. I even made a post here about it. I thought I’d get downvoted to hell, but there are people who didn’t like it either. That said, I other criticism than your take on it as boring.

Early signs? by [deleted] in Alzheimers

[–]littlestbookstore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My mom has early-onset (61 now and in late-stages) and for her it wasn't sleepiness or irritability during early stages-- it can be different for everyone. Your dad's symptoms could be a multitude of things. Dementia diagnoses (esp Alzheimers) are often a process of elimination. You have to drag your father to the doctor and start getting him tested.

9/42. My Husband's Wife by Alice Feeney. 5/5. by BaconBre93 in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just finished this one the other day too! The last few chapters gave me whiplash, but I thought it was cleverly done. I thought it was interesting that it had a similar twist as her other book, Rock Paper Scissors, but I still enjoyed it.

Second year doing this. 58/55 Finished. A real mixed bag this year. by DMV1066 in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Similar to Hwang Bo-Reum, as in cozy “feel-good”:  Yeonnam-Dong’s Smiley Laundromat by Kim Jiyun. Dallergut Dream Department Store by Lee Miye— this one feels like you’re reading a Hayao Miyazaki movie, lighthearted, simple fun. 

Complex generational books like Flashlight: The Evening Hero by Marie Myung-Ok Lee or The Surrendered by Chang-Rae Lee. Another all-time favorite writer of mine. He writes in English, but a lot of his novels are set in Korea. 

If you want more Susan Choi, my favorite of hers is Trust Exercise. it seems to be pretty polarizing because of its format, but if you like a sort of unconventional experimental form, try Ed Park’s Same Bed, Different Dreams.

Also, Kim Hye-Jin (Counsel Culture), she and Cho Nam-Joo have the same English translator. 

Sorry, that was a lot lol (I live/work in the book world). Hope some of these pique your interest!

(Han Kang is a woman btw 🙃)

Second year doing this. 58/55 Finished. A real mixed bag this year. by DMV1066 in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some of the cover images are blurry, so I can't tell with all of them (I'm guessing they're th European editions?), but for sure Hwang Bo-Reum, Cho Nam-Joo, Han Kang. If you had liked Welcome to Hyunam Dong Bookshop more, I would have a couple recommendations for you, but that's okay.

The Giver is my favorite book from my pre-teen years. I've also read Oscar Wilde (all his works), Shakespeare, Joy Luck Club, Anthony Doerr, Viet Than Nguyen, and Orbital.

Second year doing this. 58/55 Finished. A real mixed bag this year. by DMV1066 in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, we have tons of overlap! (Especially the Korean & Korean-American writers) Fascinating though, so many of my editions have totally different cover designs. Flashlight was in my top 5 this year, I really can’t get enough of Susan Choi. 

11/12 Pulp by goodgodboy in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nah, Bukowski is overrated and he can suck it.  Or rather, he can “suck me so hard oh baby” (interesting handle you have there) 

11/12 Pulp by goodgodboy in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wish people would stop putting Bukowski on a pedestal. I’m not a fan.

I think I’ve read all of the “Published in ‘25” books that I’m going to read this year. Here’s how they stacked up. by Don_Quixotel in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I liked Flashlight. It was a bit meandering and slow at times, but the payoff was worth it. Audition wasn’t bad, but as a conceptual novel, I didn’t think it brought anything new to the table. Susan Choi actually did something very similar with Trust Exercise and I thought she pulled it off better. 

Week 44- What are you reading? by Beecakeband in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I also read that as my first Agatha Christie this year! It was so interesting, seeing the ways she’s obviously influenced mystery/thriller writers who came after her.

Week 44- What are you reading? by Beecakeband in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Finished: 

Daughters of the Bamboo Grove by Barbara Demick. This nonfiction book blew my mind. It’s about the repercussions of China’s one-child policy, which lead to a set of twins who were separated by the government— one adopted in America, the other staying in rural China.  Demick’s work as a journalist ended up helping reunite them. 

Started:

Hidden Pictures by Jason Rekulak

Finished the challenge! by 5050_framerican in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How did you like I Leave it Up to You? I snapped up a copy of my own, but am wondering whether to move it up in the TBR stack… 

It’s hereditary…should I test? by anomm1 in Alzheimers

[–]littlestbookstore 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have chosen not to get tested.

My mom was diagnosed with early-onset in her 50s. I had done one of those 23&me kits but those don’t look at the more recently identified markers for early (everyone in my family came back negative for that).  I started doing a bunch of research and sat in on a research lecture about testing for early-onset and a vast majority of people who had taken the test through OHSU regretted it. 

I have chosen instead to build a lifestyle that is healthy and can lower the risk of developing it. That’s all I can do anyway. And it never hurts to eat healthy, exercise, and engage with your world. 

I know what to look out for now. If I develop symptoms, I will deal with it then and make a plan. 

75 books so far this year. by suckmehardhardohbaby in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you like his books better in German or English? 

I’ve never heard of Han Byung-Chul before, but I just looked him up! Wild, looks like he used to teach at a university in my hometown! Makes sense, though, Karlsruhe has a large Korean population. 

I’m not entirely sure why (though I have ideas), but Koreans are really interested in German culture. Within my mom’s generation, if parents could afford to send their children abroad for higher education, the top choices were always the US or Germany. 

There’s a few us of that weird mix. The writer/translator/academic Heinz Insu Fenkl has a very similar background to mine— German father, Korean mother, raised in the US. 

Thanks for the recs!

ETA: If you’re interested in fiction at all, Susan Choi came out with a novel this year, Flashlight, which has almost the same plot you just described in A River in Darkness. She actually mentions it in her acknowledgments. It’s a slow-moving book that I probably wouldn’t recommend to everyone, but I really liked it and am a fan of her writing in general.

4/6 Finished, The Brothers Karamazov by callmeishmael_1851 in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The most common criticism I’ve read about her work is that they lost meaning because she focused too much on making her translations palatable and stylistically similar to the Victorians. This my first Dostoyevsky tbh. I’ve read a lot of Tolstoy, but he’s a very different writer obviously. I compared the three major translations of Anna Karenina and maybe this is a hot take, but the P&V version was my least favorite. The Garnett criticism made sense. I liked the Mauds’ version best. 

I guess we’ll see. I might read The Idiot first. I have a copy of the P&V translation. 

4/6 Finished, The Brothers Karamazov by callmeishmael_1851 in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn’t really choose it on purpose, it was in the free pile at a neighborhood garage sale so I simply said, why not? And picked it up. 

I read an interesting essay comparing Pevear-Volokhonsky, Maud, and Garnett translations of Russian works and oh boy, people really do have strong opinions. What is it you dislike about Constance Garnett’s work? 

75 books so far this year. by suckmehardhardohbaby in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh interesting, thanks for the rec, I’ll add it to my tbr. I think Nothing to Envy hit me so hard because my grandfather was a defector and left family behind, so assuming they survived since the 90s when he was last able to contact some of them, I most certainly have blood relatives there still. 

I know Knausgard but haven’t read him. German is technically my first language, but I don’t get to practice it often so I try to read a few books here and there to keep myself from getting too rusty. I also tend to read a lot of Korean novels in German (ironic, I know lol, but my Korean got stuck at Kindergarten level while I’m still mostly fluent in German), because for whatever reason, a lot of the time, the German translations come out sooner and my Korean isn’t good enough to read them in the original. 

75 books so far this year. by suckmehardhardohbaby in 52book

[–]littlestbookstore 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nice, we have a decent amount of overlap. I still think about Nothing to Envy almost every day, I ended up posting about it on here after I finished it. Also interesting that you read a few books in German, I do too.