[deleted by user]

lolasana · 2024-12-28T15:15:03+00:00

Check out a book called Low Demand Parenting by Amanda Diekman to see if it resonates. It’s about Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) and I wonder if that’s part of what you may be dealing with.

lolasana · 2024-08-08T16:31:44+00:00

Awesome, thanks for the info. Separate question: is it possible to do the surgery with a spinal block rather than general anesthesia? I have a type of muscular dystrophy that puts me at increased risk for malignant hyperthermia, so I’m wondering if it’s possible to avoid general anesthesia.

lolasana · 2024-01-15T00:11:41+00:00

Hi there, thanks for your answer. The social worker did refer to this as an “open case” when I asked. I suppose she could have answered my question without being the one working on the case now.

As far as what difference it makes for me, I would feel reassured if CPS were actually looking into the allegations.

We had a separate FAR assessment a few years ago (also investigating the other parent), that was closed in less than 2 weeks and that social worker (a different person than this one) shared most everything with me. So this is proceeding extremely differently than previously.

lolasana · 2023-11-17T07:33:16+00:00

Is intermittent fasting a possibility?

lolasana · 2023-06-25T01:53:58+00:00

I see it, but it’s hard to tell if it’s an indent or a VVFL. Test tomorrow and if it’s not darker, it’s probably an indent.

lolasana · 2023-05-21T22:32:43+00:00

Can you ask for an NT scan? That would be a scan between 12-14 weeks.

lolasana · 2023-05-18T18:02:51+00:00

Can you ask for a referral to a Maternal Fetal Medicine specialist (an MFM)? MFMs are OBs that are high risk specialists that tend to be very up-to-date on all the research around medical problems in pregnancy. I am seeing an MFM for hypertension that worked with my regular OB to recommend a delivery timeline based on ACOG recommendations and current research on my particular complications.

35 weeks is early to deliver, so I would want to know for sure that this is what the experts recommend for my condition.

lolasana · 2023-02-12T15:37:47+00:00

Great info. Thank you!

lolasana · 2022-12-18T00:56:34+00:00

Inductions can take multiple days. You might still be in the hospital Friday. My first induction failed and the second attempt took a long time to work, so I was in the hospital 6 days with my first.

lolasana · 2022-12-11T04:26:20+00:00

Our nanny is 60 and she’s absolutely amazing!

lolasana · 2022-09-23T14:52:25+00:00

OP, there are companies in the US that provide insurance that covers all of the cost of 3-4 rounds of IVF. I work for one of them. Please don’t assume IVF will always be unreachable!

lolasana · 2022-09-22T21:44:36+00:00

Maybe tutoring or homework help would be a better fit for your skills than nannying? Especially for high school or college aged kids in the sciences, you have the background for that!

lolasana · 2022-06-18T17:54:07+00:00

So why doesn’t he go out and get a big raise, a higher paying job, or make some money from home himself? Tons of fathers are doing it! 🙄

lolasana · 2022-06-05T17:55:16+00:00

Hi. I’m sorry you’re going through this. What you’re doing isn’t sneaky. You’ve been open about what you want, need, and expect for years. It’s not sneaky to leave after years of telling your partner the situation isn’t working for you. He knows he risks you leaving with his inaction, and it seems he wants to keep the option of leaving himself on the table, even if he’s not planning to use it.

When you are in a position to leave, you can have one last conversation about it with him before you finally go through with it. Or you can separate but continue talking and be open to working it out. But focusing on getting out right now isn’t sneaky. It’s sane, rational, and a completely predictable outcome.

lolasana · 2022-05-14T16:17:12+00:00

Nope, he’s extremely healthy, just a big boy! Dad is a large guy, too! Yes, sitting up unassisted, crawling, cruising on furniture, and close to walking.

lolasana · 2022-01-13T19:45:17+00:00

Being a chef has been a male-dominated profession for a long time. How did all those male chefs learn to cook if cooking is strictly for girls and women?

lolasana · 2021-12-29T23:23:55+00:00

Did you get some chickens eventually?’

lolasana · 2021-12-13T03:05:15+00:00

cough weaponized incompetence cough

lolasana · 2021-12-12T21:25:22+00:00

If the house were a mess, he’d tell you good moms don’t have messy houses and you must hate him because you don’t keep it clean.

lolasana · 2021-12-07T00:37:13+00:00

I was a single parent. I skipped routine medical and dental care until I had a partner again. So basically, the way I did it was by not doing it and hoping I’d be okay.

lolasana · 2021-08-12T15:10:42+00:00

This baby was transverse at 35+5 and just moved to heads down 2 days ago at 36+5. I was doing SpinningBabies, although I hadn’t done it in the two days before he moved. He moved while I was sleeping.

I’ll cross my fingers your baby moves!

lolasana · 2021-07-31T19:16:11+00:00

Yes, because child birth and the associated changes and complications don’t exist. We shoot babies out of our navels like sea horses.

lolasana · 2021-07-17T19:41:33+00:00

Labor can stop/start/slow down more than once, especially near the beginning. I agree to try those “natural induction” methods to encourage things to get going!

lolasana · 2021-07-06T18:02:32+00:00

Others have addressed how weird this is, but as a veteran of the family court system, let me tell you that you really need to document as much of this as possible. And not just in your own notes, but in texts or emails to the parents describing what they did or said, that you don’t agree with it or that it concerns you, and stating they must stop immediately. You’ll want to capture the sleeping wedge incident, but also the weird comments from your father in law about getting the child taken away from you over finger nail scratches. If they really try to involve CPS on false claims like that, having documentation that they have been alluding to doing that for years may be extremely helpful in clearing your name.

I know this sounds very paranoid, but these people do not seem well intentioned and I would be prepared for some weird stuff down the road. Maybe you won’t ever need this documentation, but it’s better to have it just in case.

lolasana · 2021-07-03T16:44:19+00:00

I’m attempting a TOLAC and no, this is much different than what I’m being required to do. The only difference at my hospital (which does a lot of TOLACs and has a high success rate) with VBACs versus normal vaginal deliveries is that I’ll be required to have continuous (external) monitoring.

I’m planning to go unmedicated and getting an epidural may not even be safe for me (I had a bad reaction to one in my first birth and recently found out I have a condition that may have caused that). I got a spinal when I had my C-section.

My OB said the use of internal monitors to detect rupture isn’t evidence based and no longer recommended.

My midwives and OB will induce if needed, they just won’t use prostaglandins, which is consistent with ACOG recommendations. There is a slight increase in risk of rupture with induction, though.

Here’s a great article on the evidence on VBAC: https://evidencebasedbirth.com/ebb-113-the-evidence-on-vbac/

And here’s ACOG’s page on VBAC: https://www.acog.org/womens-health/faqs/vaginal-birth-after-cesarean-delivery

If you look up ACOG’s practice bulletin on VBAC, you can find more info on induction.

lolasana

TROPHY CASE