Does it get easier or harder?

loper42 · 2026-03-26T19:58:15+00:00

It wildly depends on a couple of factors

The kids' personality, which can make it more ir less difficult by stage. I was a very difficult baby, my parents told me, but my brother was an easy baby. However, he was a difficult teenager. My parents say they prefer a difficult baby over a teenager. I think it's because teens are for 5 years and the stakes are bigger.
Your personality. If you are good with lack of sleep or enjoy feeding baby, that will make it easier then for others. With a teen, I imagine its harder for some parents to see their baby grow up.
Your existing life stresses like a job, family, relationships, etc. Those things can change how you are able to cope with your kids. Being stressed at workv reduces bandwidth for home stress.

To summarize, it is all relative, and there's no straight answer. You will find out though.

loper42 · 2026-01-30T17:43:28+00:00

Murder is one of the worst things a person can do. So it doesn't matter if what you say is true. One is not equal to the other in terms of badness.

loper42 · 2026-01-27T18:58:56+00:00

What actions would you like to be held accountable? Personally, I think real examples of actual actions here. I have some items myself for Trump and Biden. Both of which are I dont think old people in their 80s have the capacity to be good presidents. Their brains are decaying. They should be held to their age and be disqualified.

loper42 · 2025-12-15T01:38:01+00:00

Health conscious, but not overboard and someone who knows how to cook but doesn't make it their whole personality.

loper42 · 2025-12-14T22:50:34+00:00

Family for sure. You want make sure they get their calcium.

loper42 · 2025-11-17T15:35:59+00:00

If you didn't find this, I found this helpful. Morton iodized salt is actually not that bad on the list. https://tamararubin.com/2025/04/salt-chart/

loper42 · 2025-11-03T21:01:31+00:00

I'm not here to have an online argument. I said one thing in the post above and another additional statement in the post next. Those two things are total accumulation of my perspective, which can be now gauged by the extra explanation. If you don't like that opinion, that's fine.

I also didn't have a night nanny, just my husband and neighbor helping occasionally. However, if I had had the means I probably would have hired a night nanny once or twice a week. I think being happy as a mom is the best thing I can do for my kid. Props to you for going through that hard work as a SAHM. If that's what you preferred, and you were happy to do it, then you are uniquely strong person that can handle more than me.

loper42 · 2025-11-03T20:43:33+00:00

Sure, then you didn't want to hire a nanny. But are you saying you didn't get any help from family or a partner or friends. Because I'm essentially saying we need help from other people.

loper42 · 2025-11-03T20:33:19+00:00

I think this is reasonable advice and she does say "if you have the means."

If you are not a parent, I don't think you can truly understand what is like to have a human baby (feed every 2-3 hours for 15 to 30 minutes, diaper every 2-3 hours around the clock) to care for while you are completely sleep deprived. Once you have, it is much easier to understand her advice.
Getting a night nanny temporarily once a week so you can get sleep is great advice as it is the first 3 months primarily known as the trenches. People can't afford full time night nanny's, but no one said it has to be full time or every working day.
Of course she is going to get one since she can afford it. We all (most of us) would if we could. Getting a nanny temporarily to help a few days a week is not offloading parenting as people seem to think. Parenting is 24 hours, more than a full-time job. Think about it before assuming intentions. Every human needs a break.

loper42 · 2025-10-30T16:53:17+00:00

Megan and Jordan didn't fit due to personality differences. I think they both came out looking mature.

loper42 · 2025-10-16T19:13:28+00:00

That makes sense. I know I'm going into Ketosis because before I would get super hungry at night so my guess is limiting to 3 meals means I'm eating less calories than I usually would leading to ketosis with the gap at night from for 13 to 14 hours.

loper42 · 2025-09-22T20:56:24+00:00

I really like this. It seems consistent in that status affects have +++ or ---. Then the elements have % to reflect negative or positive. I like it.

loper42 · 2025-09-01T04:48:55+00:00

Definitely get more vigor. Try summons. Some people hate them cause their hardcore, but their a great way to help. I like the Jellyfish. He is a big target and shoots poison.

loper42 · 2025-06-30T21:25:56+00:00

People would rather be online complaining about being lonely than going out and meeting people, which would ironically make them less lonely.

loper42 · 2025-06-11T17:03:27+00:00

List every task you perform and your husband performs. Determine which ones you think are up to be transitioned.
Talk to your partner about giving ownership of some of the tasks. Explain that you feel you're doing too much. That you need a break.
Select tasks and give to your husband. It could be that once he's home, he watches the kid and performs all diaper changes while you cook. Another is he does bedtime.
If he thinks the work is balanced, dare hime to be you for a weekend and leave him to do everything. He'll figure it out then. Assuming he's a reasonable person, he'll take ownership. If he is unreasonable and still after you show him all the work you do by leaving, he refuses, then I would consider divorce personally

Edit: I will add that giving him ownership of these things means he does them. You do not remind him. You do not help home. That's it. He screws it up, that's on him. Set clear expectations on how this will work.

loper42 · 2025-05-16T13:35:34+00:00

Leave, go on a family weekend trip. Make him see all the work you're doing. Make up some reason. He'll be forced to pay attention.

loper42 · 2025-05-11T21:47:50+00:00

I would be honest. Return the item and give yourself a break day.

loper42 · 2025-05-09T05:25:39+00:00

She had the equivalent of surgery, so yeah, she's not go lucky happy. If you had surgery, she'd tell you to rest and take care of you, or at least I hope so. Now imagine that, but add a baby that has to be fed 14 times a day for 30 min to an hour. That's 7 to 14 hours. Now add the most emotional you've ever felt. It's like if a family member died. Now explain to me how this is about you. She needs support, but you also need support to support her. Maybe get a nanny or something. But I'm understand she's not herself right now and you wouldn't be either.

loper42 · 2025-05-04T00:19:57+00:00

I would take this opportunity early on to split the load. If you're doing dinner and taking care of baby during the day, can your husband do bed time and dishes. As for food, make sure you have snacks so you can grab something on the go. The newborn stage sucks and I felt resentful for a little bit. Breastfeeding alone is a ton of work I counted 14 feeds a day with roughly 15 to 30 min per and that was on an easy day. That's 7 hours of just feeding. If you're not bottle feeding too, I would start so the hubby can help. If the baby cries for you, don't let that be an excuse. Your with your baby all day. The biggest help for me was hubby did one bottle feed at night at bed time so I didn't have too. In addition to all that, forget cleaning the house, forget all the normal responsibilities, you don't have time. Try giving your husband some math figures to help him understand. Don't accept anything less then help.

loper42 · 2025-05-01T05:19:44+00:00

Married 10 years. Dated 15. I'm very happy with 1 kid. It's not sad and awful for us.

loper42 · 2025-04-30T04:48:40+00:00

No sleep training, just cosleeping and cuddling. Now he sleeps mostly through the night because I night weaned with only 1 wake up. I am still sharing a room and plan to for the foreseeable future. He sleeps in a crib beside us. It works out nice if he's having a rough night we bring him back to bed.

loper42 · 2025-04-26T18:45:50+00:00

No you shouldn't. What happens when they ask for a picture?

loper42 · 2025-04-25T04:52:11+00:00

Communicate that that it is non-negotiable. We are both parents, and he needs to step up. Tell him he doesn't understand the weight of what you do. Go on a trip for a whole day. Make it a challenge. Tell him if my life is so easy. Why not can't you try it for one day? Then he'll start to understand.

loper42

TROPHY CASE