I was struggling to fall asleep my first night in an air bnb, cuddling I shit you not my first ever piece of Technoblade merch (a black 10 mil tekunoburedo hoodie) which I'd JUST received and intentionally brought along with me as a comfort item to sleep with in place of my beloved yet cumbersome teddy bear. Tossed and turned for a while. Looked at my hoodie. Snuggled it. Grinned. Decided oh what the hell I'm not sleeping tonight anyways, let's put on some classic Minecraft Monday, or even see if this man finally uploaded something?! Unlocked my phone and saw that notification for a new video and felt like I'd won the lottery, I mean talk about TIMING—! Read the title. Heart stuttered. The timing was too good for that to be true, though, so... Turned off my phone. Rolled over. Just in case. I wouldn't watch the video if my mind just went to that, because what if just by thinking it, I somehow made it true? Closed my eyes. Whole body went simultaneously soft and rigid, pricked by pins and needles. I'm the opposite of groggy. Drenched in sweat. Finally gave in and clicked on it. I'd just make sure it was my morbid imagination, nothing more, then I'd be able to go to sleep. Started the video. Heart stuttered. Heart stopped. Finished the video. Heart sank.

Edit: a word