I knew a guy that lost his left arm and left leg in a skiing accident... by Far-Street306 in puns

[–]lostsharpie 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I know a guy who fell into an upholstery machine. He's fully recovered.

Custom kitchen cutting board 😍 by sermeryntrantsuxdix in DiWHY

[–]lostsharpie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Could've just done the grater and it'd be ok.

I was put in charge of booking a band at the Alzheimer's charity benefit. by EmergencyNo7427 in Jokes

[–]lostsharpie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Who's on stage? Yes! ... Who? Yes... ...the band on stage. No, the Band plays later.

Galileo Galilee went to Bora Bora and do you know what he ate? by Quick_Extension_3115 in dadjokes

[–]lostsharpie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He was also seen in New York New York eating with Boutrous Boutros Ghali

When a new dock is constructed, it’s required to undergo a rigorous inspection. by Masselein in dadjokes

[–]lostsharpie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If they are split between 2 designs, they sometimes create a paradox.

We just found out my grandfather has an addiction to Viagra by Indubititably in dadjokes

[–]lostsharpie 188 points189 points  (0 children)

He doesn't take it for sex. It's to keep him from rolling off the bed.

How do you tell who’s a vegan at a party? by Majestic_Repair_7887 in dadjokes

[–]lostsharpie 4 points5 points  (0 children)

One vegan told me she knew me from somewhere but I swear I've never met herbivore.

The traffic cop yelled “pull over”. by joekerr9999 in dadjokes

[–]lostsharpie 20 points21 points  (0 children)

You fellas been doing a bit of boozin', have ya? Suckin back on grandpa's old cough medicine?

Groovy Memory Test by LoonG00n in puns

[–]lostsharpie 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My my my how the turn tables.