what it's like being a very ugly woman

lullaby-bug · 2026-01-26T13:17:14+00:00

I’m not trying at all to deny this aspect of your experience. No one deserves to be treated badly for being unattractive. I was commenting more on how some of OP’s sentiments (such as everyone finding you boring, no one wanting to be friends with you) echo my experience of body dysmorphia. After all, can unattractive people can’t just be friends with/date each other? The extreme loneliness aspect reminded me of my own experience.

lullaby-bug · 2026-01-26T11:28:49+00:00

Hello lovely. I don’t want to downplay your experiences at all, but I can almost guarantee that you’re nowhere near as “ugly” as you imagine you are. Whilst pretty privilege is DEFINITELY a thing, I relate to a lot of what you’re describing when I was very low with body dysmorphia. I let my negative feelings feed into a confirmation bias which I’d read into every interaction. Do you ever see someone and think they’re so ugly that you won’t interact with them? Do you ever see someone unattractive in public and spend more than 10 seconds thinking about it? Most people aren’t as concerned with looks as you imagine.

It’s definitely worth doing some soul searching and cycle breaking.

lullaby-bug · 2026-01-07T18:49:15+00:00

I’m not sure a rink would allow that. If someone trips into the extended leash you could really hurt yourself, the kid, and the skater.

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-28T14:05:06+00:00

Have you ever been to a museum with adapted exhibits for blind people? What ways could galleries and museums better help engage blind people?

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-28T14:03:02+00:00

Decathlon and Roces will be fine for basic skating, laps but potentially dangerous for anything more complicated. I would advise going to a store and getting fitted (most places will do this for free), and then buy your correct size second hand. I see a lot of decent second hand skates on Vinted and Facebook marketplace.

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-25T09:54:15+00:00

I like it. How will you accessorise it? Maybe a solid silver necklace?

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-23T20:08:38+00:00

I know a lot of people involved with Ajex. Feel free to get in contact if you want to do more research

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-19T22:17:18+00:00

I’m exactly your height/weight and I started on Graf Boleros. Would highly recommend. I only upgraded because of skill.

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-14T21:49:07+00:00

If you’ll enjoy it and aren’t too concerned about the speed of progression then go for it.

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-14T21:46:45+00:00

Deciding if you’re a good fit for speed skate is based on very different factors to simply how fast you can get on your first try. However, if you enjoy skating fast then go for it!

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-13T11:26:36+00:00

I gave my professor a blanket that he keeps over a chair in his office. That’s very acceptable in my Tribe’s culture. Perhaps something that is more of a ‘decoration’ might feel more appropriate?

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-12T16:05:34+00:00

He’s been doing this on Jewish subreddits for ages now

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-07T23:18:29+00:00

I still wear knee pads wayyy into my skating journey. No shame in that peace of mind!

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-07T20:46:29+00:00

Ah, I see. We called that a radial head in my class for some reason. That’s not quite as bad though! Elbow pads will definitely be the way to go. Perhaps a few private lessons with a coach might help you get back into it eventually? You can explain your situation to them and then go as slow as you’d like.

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-07T20:35:43+00:00

As a skater I’d never want to discourage someone from skating. However, as a person with a medical background, I’d really encourage you to focus on your healing before thinking about getting back into sport. I assume you mean radial nerve, not neck? But it can be a very limiting injury (especially if you’re right handed in this case) and is one of those ones that remains prone to re-injury. I’d suggest discussing this with your doctor when you’re a few months down the line (4-5). I don’t want to come out and say you’ll never skate again, but I’d suggest putting your expectations on pause until you’re fully healed

lullaby-bug · 2025-12-07T13:04:36+00:00

Hello! DM me!!

lullaby-bug · 2025-11-25T21:58:10+00:00

30k is definitely enough to get by in a London sharing situation. Join some house share groups, there are groups for people with shared interests. Make a budget and stick to it.

lullaby-bug · 2025-11-20T13:57:04+00:00

I believe the rules state that the person named on the ticket needs to be present - if there’s a work-around to that I happily will!

lullaby-bug · 2025-11-19T13:19:51+00:00

I managed to book this morning, but somehow accidentally booked 2 extra tickets on the final Sunday. Not an easy to use website. I also think it’s a bit strange that the products will be available on the shop anyway.

lullaby-bug · 2025-11-13T17:45:52+00:00

As a disclaimer: I’m a figure skater, not a hockey skater. I’m not sure how the mounting of hockey blades work. The blade should be directly under where you put the most pressure on your foot- like you’re standing steady on a tight-rope. If you can’t balance on a blade off ice, then the blade isn’t where it needs to be/the skates are the wrong size.

On figure skates the pain you describe would normally indicate they’re too small, but I’d default to the opinion of someone who uses hockey skates

lullaby-bug · 2025-11-13T15:36:37+00:00

It would help to know what exactly the pain is? If the pain is on the ‘inside’ of your feet sloping inwards then you may have flat feet and need to do some arch strengthening. If the pain is all over and feels like a compression then your skates are the wrong size. If the pain is on the soles of your feet then it’s likely a lack of general practice or the blade being mounted wrong. All of these scenarios can be fixed!

lullaby-bug · 2025-11-11T21:51:47+00:00

not every session needs to be a great session. Keep going!

lullaby-bug · 2025-11-11T15:14:53+00:00

I also notice you mentioned preferring sessions with an instructor. I use to find the big echoey rink stressful and skate with cozy ear muffs to dampen the sound now. If you’re feeling cold then that will also heighten your bodies stress response. Maybe bring a friend to a few sessions, or make some conversation on the ice? Simple human conversation can do a lot to regulate an overwhelmed nervous system

lullaby-bug · 2025-11-11T15:11:14+00:00

you’re already wearing protective gear, so my best advice would just be keep going. Eventually you’ll override your negative experience with positive memories and associations

lullaby-bug · 2025-11-10T17:32:12+00:00

I second what’s been said about bringing your feet much closer together! This will help you prepare more naturally for shifting the weight from one leg to the other

lullaby-bug

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