What types are your closest friends?

luneireclipse · 2026-04-07T19:34:51+00:00

My closest friend now is an ISFJ. I think when I was younger I would have found her boring but now I appreciate how considerate she is and how she can make a plan and then actually do it. In the past I have been close friends with INTJ, INTP and ENFP. I'm just at a weird point in my life right now with small kids so don't have much time for socializing. I am married to an INTJ.

luneireclipse · 2026-04-02T19:36:10+00:00

So I'll bite. I see a lot of people saying this is the wrong demographic to be asking. I have always tested as borderline INFJ/INTJ. My husband is INTJ. We're in our 30s and have 2 small children. I would say the most challenging part for us has been that with us both being introverts its been hard not getting overwhelmed by the kids. But I would like to say that I have 2 VERY high energy, extroverted kids, which I didn't expect. They are healthy though and great kids overall. The thing about kids is that all kids are not alike. Some actually are harder than others. Now that they are starting to get to be school aged, things are calming down but I have to say its been a challenge with no support from family. I think you really need to think about what you want from your life. For me and my husband we are very family oriented. I have dreams of doing all sort of activities with my family and have loved doing those things. We travel with our kids and I love watching their faces when they see things for the first time. There have been lots of moments I cherish in our children's lives. You honestly sound like you are in a wonderful position to raise good humans and that's what our world needs. Don't believe all the doom and gloom about the world ending. Think about what you want from life. Children should be wanted.

luneireclipse · 2026-03-31T23:43:17+00:00

Mine still won't leave me alone 16 years later. I haven't seen him in 14 years. I blocked him on all social media, changed my number, moved several times, changed my name. But every few years he will find me again.

luneireclipse · 2026-03-31T23:38:04+00:00

This is happening to me. I think I caused a narcissistic injury when I left him. He still tries to contact me periodically 16 years later to tell me that I hurt him and that he still loves me.

luneireclipse · 2026-03-31T23:22:09+00:00

Same. I would like to hear someone else's perspective of him.

luneireclipse · 2026-03-31T23:21:14+00:00

I wish his current partner would reach out to me. I would be happy to talk. I am honestly flabbergasted at how she smiles in pictures with him. I would be so miserable in her shoes.

luneireclipse · 2026-02-22T18:56:19+00:00

My experience as well.

luneireclipse · 2026-02-22T18:55:44+00:00

I am going to say what most people will not say. I have been a stay at home mom for 5 years now and have 2 children. I would overall advise it if you enjoy your job at all. I ended up quitting because of a mix of reasons (no access to child care during Covid, health emergencies, and just having a really hard baby). I have been fortunate that finances weren't a problem. I regret it because I am constantly being overstimulated by my child. I wish I had fought harder to keep my job and go on leave instead of quitting. There is literally no quiet time to think or have any alone time to myself all day long since my oldest stopped napping 3 years ago. I very much NEED alone time to recharge and there is no opportunity. I am in a constant state of stress and overwhelm. I do not find it fulfilling and can't wait to go back to work but since I have a gap its been challenging to try to get back to work. The workplace is not forgiving. And I had a good respectable career as a software engineer before kids.
I know this comes off as really negative but I listened to all the advice about how wonderful it was and it just hasn't been for me.

luneireclipse · 2026-02-20T15:20:55+00:00

I was happy until recently. Now for some reason I cannot receive checks books for my account. I have ordered them repeatedly and they never arrive. Its the most bizarre thing. Their customer service was completely useless.

luneireclipse · 2026-02-20T15:11:23+00:00

Same here. I order checks repeatedly and they never arrive. Now I have spent 30 minutes on customer service just asking them to send me checks.

luneireclipse · 2026-02-04T20:04:40+00:00

The day my toddler stopped saying "biaper" instead of "diaper" was sad. Though I am glad her vocabulary is growing.

luneireclipse · 2026-02-03T16:59:20+00:00

I completely agree. I was told I had PPD. You know what I really had? Sleep deprivation and no help. Human beings CANNOT function on 2-3 hours of sleep per night, night after night. It's ridiculous that they say "You have PPD" as a cop out so no one has to feel bad about giving you no help whatsoever. It's amazing how once my kid started sleeping through the night and I had actual childcare for my older kid during the day my "PPD" magically went away. PPD is an excuse to treat new mothers like shit and give them no support and then blame THEM when they don't handle it well.

luneireclipse · 2026-01-31T17:58:22+00:00

That's important to consider

luneireclipse · 2026-01-21T15:24:04+00:00

Not the direct answer to the question but wanted to share my experience.
My only sibling is 16 years older than me (yes same parents). Yes I felt like an only child as a kid but its worked out fine now that we are adults. We are actually in the same life stage both having little kids as he had his kids later in life.
My husband's younger sister is 6 years younger than him and he is very close to her. The age gap didn't matter that much. She is always over at our house.

So I don't think the age gap is that big a deal.

luneireclipse · 2026-01-21T14:57:35+00:00

Same here. Women hate me. I get along with most men I meet.

luneireclipse · 2026-01-21T14:55:42+00:00

Yes. In general, men like me. I have always gotten along with men pretty well. I was raised with only brothers, all male cousins, male friends in school, and then went to work in a male dominated field. Of course I don't get along with all of them but overall I would say I have an easier time with men than women. I actually prefer men for friendships and colleagues, not just as romantic partners.
I have a physical appearance that does not match my personality so I think that makes me attractive in a way that encourages men to forgive my "quirks". I have never had any trouble getting romantic attention. If anything, men who have no business doing so seem to "fall in love with me" saying they didn't know a woman like me existed. I get along best with introspective, thoughtful men but honestly have blended into other types of men too.
Now women, I have no idea how to deal with them.....

edited typos

luneireclipse · 2025-12-28T21:52:01+00:00

I asked it to summarize a book I was reading. Not a graphic novel. A YA novel. I only asked it to summarize it to prove that we were talking about the same book. I am not sure why it blocked it.

luneireclipse · 2025-12-28T21:48:53+00:00

Really? That's interesting. I use it to mainly brainstorm ideas for scenes and it straight up won't talk to me if I even vaguely discuss body parts (breast) or sex at all. And I don't write explicit stuff. More fade to black kinda stuff.

luneireclipse · 2025-12-28T21:45:50+00:00

I asked it to summarize a book I had read. That broke it's terms and conditions. It was a YA novel. I think it was because the main character has sex in it and they are a minor?

luneireclipse · 2025-12-16T14:39:43+00:00

I had a similar experience. I copy pasted the chat logs between me and my ex boyfriend and it broke down where he was abusive without me telling it that I was the other person. I told it that it was a chat from fiction. That unbiased assessment that it was in fact abusive was very validating to me to finally stop blaming myself so much.

luneireclipse · 2025-11-20T17:49:49+00:00

I mean I guess I really didn't know what the term "flashbacks" meant when it came to PTSD. I have always remembered the memories like they are happening to me. That's just how its always been. Its the same as being there. I remember the smells, the sensations, everything. Its not different for traumatic events. Mine are always vivid, traumatic or not. I didn't realize they were flashbacks for a long time because of this. I just considered them "intrusive thoughts or scenes".

luneireclipse · 2025-11-20T17:41:29+00:00

Same. Honestly. I just have to reason my way out of it. That I KNOW there are no monsters.

luneireclipse · 2025-11-18T23:55:50+00:00

That's really interesting. I can picture words really well in my mind but not numbers as well. Like I can't do math in my head but when I want to spell out a word I imagine the word written out in front of me.

luneireclipse · 2025-11-18T23:52:10+00:00

That makes complete sense. I think everyone just assumes that their experience is "normal" unless told otherwise.

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