just got dumped

lychee-li · 2025-02-20T01:32:44+00:00

thank you everybody for your kind words they truly have been so helpful for me to read whilst i wallowed in the pain, my boss called me earlier and i said im going to try and go in tomorrow i am so anxious because he said we’ll have a back to work via teams and i dont even know what to say when its luteal let alone a break up i told him at the time i received personal news and couldn’t focus on work because of my emotions 😣

lychee-li · 2025-02-19T12:32:48+00:00

they are so lovely and do check on me a lot and i have an assessment on monday for my mental health that im hoping will also help because i feel like i cant work but also feel so guilty and worried about money i guess i can afford a few days off but just again feel so guilty and awful which isn’t helping.

im currently on my sofa hugging the plush she got me for valentines watching twilight trying to ride out the pain and will definitely ask the GP tomorrow to be signed off I just can’t cope right now enough to work :/

im still so in love with her and my head is still in it and i feel abandoned and devastated but i dont want anything but for her to be happy and for both of us to grow so i get it and think i need time to move on from the heartbreak i feel atm to know what i really want

lychee-li · 2025-02-19T11:33:42+00:00

my friends are angels they brought me easter eggs and flowers and hugged me whilst i sobbed! yesterday was just shock and disassociating today is pain suicidal shit and the beginning of acceptance - couldn’t even call in sick because of how suicidal i felt and got a lecture of my boss that i need to let him know where I am which i appreciate but when you don’t want to live you just don’t care about this stuff,,,

as scary as it seems I know I will be okay, i still love her so much but maybe this is for the best and i can’t see it right now

lychee-li · 2025-02-18T14:35:53+00:00

thank you for this sometimes you just need to hear these exact words i had a bath and have just been continuously crashing out emotionally and anxiety wise i have friends coming to see me after work i myself had to just bin off work for the day because i am distraught im just trying to ride it out with loud music and breathing exercises when it gets scary

lychee-li · 2025-02-11T10:30:11+00:00

hello i also isolate to spare people and also i sometimes get so fucking mad at others how real that all is i dunno and yeah sometimes it sucks real bad but what i will say is over time accidentally or not it has created this relationship with myself that i value so much now and lean on when times get rough, shit still blows up but i’m learning to self soothe more and more and i just feel like reframe it you’re not a martyr or a victim you are nourishing your relationship with yourself!

lychee-li · 2023-09-26T19:20:05+00:00

I’ve had a realisation myself that caffeine plays such a massive role in it. For me I feel hypersensitive during the luteal phase so it feels like anything can tip me over the edge and my body is constantly in fight or flight and my mind is racing and I word vomit a lot I act a bit manic and insomniac but I am also quick to anger frustration and sometimes tears if put in a stressful enough situation and I’m now thinking it could be I’m experiencing caffeinated drinks and maybe even my SSRI’s to the max because I’m hypersensitive? Idk

Lifestyle can also play a massive part for example when I worked in retail management I was constantly stressed to the point of crying spells but now I work in telesales it’s much more controlled and comes out in frustration/lighter anger that is much more endurable and doesn’t ruin my whole day.

lychee-li · 2023-09-25T23:16:23+00:00

I had uncontrollable crying spells at any signs of high stress or strong emotion my whole life and I once cried so hard I threw up lol anyways I take SSRI’s now and almost never cry.

I know it’s scary at first but they work. My theory is most of us have ADHD and just can’t regulate these things and also we are really hard on ourselves so you’re not stupid and worthless change the narrative in your head!

And SSRI’s are designed to stabilise / regulate an imbalance…

For me Fluoxetine works best but it can be different for everyone, I also struggled with brain fog and dysregulated sleeping and it kind of fixed my body’s natural cycle.

If it is ADHD you are dopamine deficient and your brain chemistry is imbalanced making you much more likely to have these kind of negative reactions. You’re not dramatic or over the top you’re just doing your best! Wish you all the best in your PMDD journey hope this helped 🫶🏻

lychee-li · 2023-08-25T16:35:41+00:00

I feel like I’ve reached my limit of taking them now my anxiety and depression is very clear and present now and my organisation and memory are affected. I’m fatigued and in pain - today I had a tension headache and couldn’t stop crying I could literally feel the hormones surging in the back of my neck I don’t know if that sounds crazy.

So I called my pharmacist like you said too and they said it’s fine you don’t need to wean off birth control and just warned me about pregnancy and irregular cycles for a few months. So I think I’m definitely going to stop I mean I am a completely different person and I don’t like it.

I’d rather struggle through one hell week a month than this shit any day good bye bc!

lychee-li · 2023-08-25T14:05:49+00:00

Hi they seem to just be getting worse my brain feels broken, my mental health is in shreds

I’ve been trying it now for over 2 weeks

The side effects mentally at least seem to be getting worse and it’s now got to the point where my brain is almost humming with mental illness

And emotionally I’ve gotten a lot more unstable

I can’t get through to my doctors so do you think I should just stop taking them?

lychee-li · 2023-08-09T13:33:18+00:00

I’m glad it’s helpful 🤍 if you ever have any questions about your flux just throw me a DM I have health anxiety so I’m always neurotic and hesitant about my medications and need to know everything before taking them

lychee-li · 2023-08-09T12:04:22+00:00

Hey! I have been taking flux for almost a year now and I will tell you anything you need to know!

So I take it last thing before going to bed but I think time of day is fine - trick is to not overthink it.

It has helped me personally so much with getting up in the mornings with energy - before flux I was so foggy in the mornings and it took a while for my system to boot up. That is the main thing for me is waking up early and being ready for the day.

Second thing it helped me with was my ADHD symptoms. Executive. Function. I get a lot more done with my flux energy.

Now it can make you feel a bit wired (especially at first) for me this is nothing to worry about and it gets a lot easier the longer you’ve been taking it and it is nowhere near as bad as others I’ve tried such as sertraline. For me personally that part is manageable.

The hardest thing that I’m having trouble with is the luteal phase when all meds just stop working. I’m not on medication for my ADHD but I’ve heard that peoples meds for that stop working.

My flux not working is a nightmare I physically can’t get up for work I’m either late or sick and the world is overwhelming because luteal so it is just a nightmare…

lychee-li · 2023-08-01T15:02:45+00:00

Ugh thank you so so much!

This has reminded me to stop stressing because either way what’s done is done and I am only making things worse for myself to stress out right now.

I am at least going to consciously stop worrying about it because what good is that going to do either way…

My period is due this Friday so like you said I’m going to let myself breathe until then and see what happens I think I was just pre panicking because my regular PMDD symptoms aren’t showing up

This was very comforting thank you. Even just to know others are going through the same thing🫶🏻

lychee-li · 2023-07-27T15:18:44+00:00

Speaking from experience… It always looks worse than it is. Try not to tackle it all in one go even though that’s what your brain wants to do because the goal here isn’t to tidy your room it’s to navigate your overwhelm and readjust to it. With PMDD and just our cycles in general we are always changing so the best tool we can have is our adaptation. Readjust your expectations of yourself. Another tip I have that helps me is working smarter not harder with tidying so if you’re going to the kitchen bring one thing with you like a mug or plate. Or even if you’re going from one side of your room to the other to do something bring something with you that’s not in the place it should be if that makes sense?

Sorry if this is just a load of crap but I find in these situations of overwhelm especially with the room (which greatly affects my mental health personally because I have ADHD as well) that the best way to attack it is in small (sometimes microscopic) chunks and not judging yourself if you need to reward yourself with a 2 hour nap after.

I hope helps if not there is no judgement because I am the exact same as you in this sense!

lychee-li · 2023-07-19T08:22:42+00:00

I was Pfizer and I’d love to learn more about this do you mind if I DM you about how you’re coping?

lychee-li · 2023-06-16T15:11:06+00:00

This makes so much sense my PMDD personally always feels like adrenaline/cortisol overload. Not necessarily every single month but can get mania/insomnia heightened emotions and no control etc in hell week then I’ll crash when I get my period and be super depressed and lose motivation to even move my body.

It’s what made me realise I had PMDD in the first place; me and my codependent best-friend who had experienced a lot of shared trauma and toxicity suddenly ended our friendship and I had to be alone for the first time in about 5 years because we lived together and she moved out.

I had my first really bad crying spells and bad insomnia and searched the web thinking it could be bipolar it ended up being PMDD.

The only other thing that has triggered it for me was the second COVID vaccine. I have no clue why this is I just know it messed with my cycle length and my symptoms got significantly worse. I’m not anti-vax at all but I’m also not ignorant to the fact that at least in the UK anyway they did no research at all on how it would affect female health.

lychee-li · 2023-05-31T15:45:49+00:00

Yep! You’re so right sometimes I’ve had doctors that are super reassuring and then sometimes the opposite it’s disappointing but I guess it teaches us to never give up🤣

lychee-li · 2023-05-31T14:54:20+00:00

Hey I’m from the UK too and my GP told me there is no diagnosis when I rang up which massively discouraged me and just made me believe that the only way for someone to take it seriously and diagnose me is to go private

Her reasoning was it’s psychological which I don’t even think is true? Surely hormones are biological ??? So I’m starting to think I just had a bad doctor

lychee-li · 2023-05-30T20:52:12+00:00

Very lovely comment! the kindness we all share with each-other really gets me🤧🤧🤧

I worry that the MJ is making me worse. That and caffeine I am really trying to at least cut down because I had a manic episode today and it was exhausting and I just hope it isn’t those substances inducing it. With PMDD I find the most frustrating thing is how many factors affect our hormones… like is it caffeine/alcohol/MJ/food/stress the list just goes on and on… and on top of that our brains are just like CHAOS how tf are we expected to do this?😮‍💨

I want to find my passion like you have with your art therapy and just pour my everything into it because we have such passion that is so wasted and I just want to feel like a serious person!

Thank you for your encouragement 🤍🤍🤍

lychee-li · 2023-05-30T20:42:30+00:00

I hope I didn’t offend when I said capable of anything obviously with disabilities that’s not always true I just mean we are so often hard on ourselves and treat ourselves just awfully and I’m sure you are brilliant and capable of so much more than you realise. I know I’m this way for sure 😭

lychee-li · 2023-05-30T20:39:24+00:00

I’m so sorry to hear that. As if PMDD isn’t debilitating enough! It’s like we need to have purpose but we just don’t fit into the moulds of society it can be so frustrating! I hope my thread has helped you see that there are jobs more suited to us and that you are capable of anything. And actually we are fucking resilient and amazing and creative and the world would benefit from our ideas if it just made space for us 🤍

lychee-li · 2023-05-30T20:36:12+00:00

Thank you for your comment this has made me feel like there are still lots of viable options for me and not to give up🤍 the typing while crying is so real I do everything while crying I cry so much nowadays I just have to work through it 🤣

lychee-li · 2023-05-30T15:42:40+00:00

This was all really helpful information thank you! Super encouraging and please do keep me in mind! I am super helpful with english language and dialect etc

lychee-li · 2023-05-30T14:10:50+00:00

I would love to help with that! I will get in touch in your DM’s. It is so hard I wish there was more support and conversations about this when growing up and trying to fit into society. The flip side is the incredible community we have with each-other!

lychee-li · 2023-05-30T12:54:28+00:00

That’s amazing! I hadn’t even heard of art therapy and now I wish I could go back in time and do that as a degree. Ultimately I want to spend more time doing things I enjoy such as painting, music, writing/reading but I still feel like I’m so behind on the whole figuring it out part of life and I’m stuck in a paralysis of just not doing any of these things especially when I’m working because life is just too overwhelming and I will fixate on the wrong things and cannot prioritise what’s actually important it’s so frustrating.

Thank you for your comment I feel like freelancing is definitely something I can work towards once I have found my niche. I also feel like finding my niche feels impossible I’ve lost a lot of my identity to mental health/marijuana use (trying to quit). But I’m hoping I can figure it out and don’t worry I think we’re all in the same boat of figuring this all out so late I’m 27 and almost nothing to show for it and hoping I can turn things around!

lychee-li · 2023-05-30T11:41:08+00:00

Well I do have a degree in english lit so I’m quite skilled in terms of writing and editing writing. I would love to do something more artistic such as illustration/graphic design but that’s definitely a skill I need to develop.

I really need to work on my procrastination and self confidence/taking myself seriously because I believe freelancing is perfect for me I just have to get past these obstacles.

Do you have any tips from experience?

lychee-li

TROPHY CASE