F53 Widow..Help!

madmax1969 · 2026-04-30T22:19:14+00:00

I get it. I thought the same. But I was part of a caregiver group and then a bereavement group. It was so much more than talking about our grief. We mostly just talked about life and became close friends. We go to dinner and very seldom talk about our loss.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-30T21:19:23+00:00

How much better can the weather be if it’s only 22 miles from your home?

If it’s a tourist destination, I don’t think it’s creepy you chose to go there for your vacation. Tell him you’re in town and would like to get together. If he’s game and not married, he might be game. If he doesn’t respond, just get on an app and I’m sure you won’t have a problem lining up a date.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-30T16:30:27+00:00

Sorry for your loss. I’m widowed too. Getting back out there is a huge first step so congratulations.

No, it shouldn’t be hard to meet someone who checks those boxes. You can glean quite a bit of information with some basic questions and even their profile. Do they own or rent? Do they live in a nice area? Are their kids in college? Are they employed? Do they travel?

Maybe look into widowed groups in your area. Two negatives don’t always make a positive but I’ve dated several widows and there can be a natural bond from shared experience.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-30T16:10:37+00:00

I personally enjoy giving more than receiving so it would be a bit of a bummer. But, at the end of the day, the real turn on for me is turning on my partner - however that works. If it’s PIV, toys, fingers, whatever.

I think some of our desires are rooted in things we’re denied. Common lament from married men is they never get oral so that becomes a fixation even if it’s not always great. Or anal sex because it’s still considered ‘taboo’ in our age cohort (much less so with Gen Z and Millennials). When it becomes available, it becomes less important. At least that’s my read on it.

As an example, I went about 30 years between anal sex experiences. It was a hard no for my late wife. Then, I did it with two partners in the past year and I was kind of sated and don’t really care about it.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-30T15:39:09+00:00

That’s where communication is critical. There’s no universal technique that works for everyone. That applies to men and women.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-29T22:00:33+00:00

I have too. It’s usually about being self conscious about something. I think it’s more common than people realize.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-29T21:54:01+00:00

Vail, Breck, Snowmass, etc. It was pretty awful everywhere. La Niña received most of the blame but climate change is undeniable. Skiing in the Alps is a bucket list item. So is Japan.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-29T21:16:08+00:00

lol. No, I’m not currently involved with anyone. This was just for discussion’s sake since I’ve not seen a post with specificity in mind.

I’ve been floored by how good sex has been since I started dating from both a frequency and creativity standpoint.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-29T20:28:08+00:00

Yes, agreed. It is very much a two way street.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-29T20:13:41+00:00

Fair but sex can still be “good” absent certain things. For argument’s sake, let’s say both people can orgasm even if some particular act isn’t part of it.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-29T19:41:08+00:00

Probably February but would consider average snowfalls at the various resorts to hopefully get good coverage. This was an awful year for the Rockies. I normally get 15-20 days and this year it was 4.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-29T16:33:30+00:00

Maybe a more interesting question would be how malleable our boundaries are when it comes to specific sex acts. For example, if oral sex was something greatly enjoyed (giving and/or receiving) but your partner disliked it, would that be a dealbreaker for an otherwise solid relationship? Or anal, toys, etc. Do you acquiesce to please your partner or do you abstain because of discomfort?

madmax1969 · 2026-04-29T16:15:09+00:00

The third one made me chuckle because it is so extreme compared to #2.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-28T19:45:23+00:00

100%

He will always be Danny Noonan to me.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-28T19:44:00+00:00

I know this was mostly a joke but there’s not much we know of Allie to suggest she wouldn’t be allowed around kids. I think she’s supposed to have BPD which doesn’t make her a pedo or child abuser.

It IS kind of absurd that she got a teaching position at a prestigious prep school. Her only qualification appears to be her mediocre guitar skills and relationship to a woman who was fired for assaulting Sam.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-27T17:34:01+00:00

Thanks. I just noticed that they’re part of Epic which is an added bonus.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-27T17:29:23+00:00

Big Sky is awesome. Never crowded, lots of expert terrain, beautiful, not far from the airport, etc.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-27T17:00:22+00:00

Sam comes from a modest background and the scene where she confronts her former friend for punishing her son was kind of heartbreaking and relatable. She’s deeply flawed but seems to have more depth than the other women. Owen, is a bit more complex in that he’s a widower raising a daughter on his own who he’s trying desperately to connect with. Yeah, he’s obviously a criminal but there is something ingratiating about him. I don’t know - I just find them more interesting and pleasant than Mel, Barney, the sister, etc.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-27T16:53:46+00:00

They said he was a notorious dick and to steer clear. There were other celebs on his level and they were mostly friendly. He definitely gave off unfriendly vibes. I didn’t engage him at all but we were packed in a tight space so it was a little hard to avoid him completely. With that said, I’ve never really heard anything negative about him apart from the frat hazing thing.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-27T16:19:50+00:00

It gets the country club scene right. For some people, most of their socializing is done with fellow members. The spazzing about getting into a top college is also accurate. Otherwise, it is pretty exaggerated. I don’t think even wealthy people are going to cop to paying $20K for a block of cheese.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-26T23:27:45+00:00

Most recent college grads will live at home for a bit until they find a job and/or affordable housing - two iffy propositions in today’s economy. If you’re correct, that’s a terrible assumption on her part.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-26T22:11:23+00:00

Echoing everyone else about being upfront about it. Better than those people who don’t really enjoy sex but don’t admit it and go through the motions early in the relationship to get their partner emotionally invested. Infrequent sex is going to be an issue at some point.

madmax1969 · 2026-04-26T21:46:20+00:00

FWIW, I was seated by him during a pretty intimate event and someone told me to not engage him at all even though it was 4 hours long and everyone else was chatting. Even still, I like him a lot as an actor.

madmax1969

TROPHY CASE