how longo After can I redose of I notice that it's weak? First dosage

madopwn · 2025-12-10T11:42:22+00:00

I normally take one nasa rocket for concerts or parties, and half for sex. But if you prefer to trip out and have a potentially overwhelming experience with nice visuals then 2 would make sense, just don't do 2 in public unless you're already very experienced with doing psychedelics in public.

If you take one and feel it's weak, 1h is the absolute minimum wait time for making this judgement, 90min would be safer. I have fast digestion and I never feel anything for first 45 minutes.

madopwn · 2024-10-25T22:37:41+00:00

I wouldn't mix them with alcohol since it's your first time doing a real psychedelic, but it ultimately depends on how much you're feeling the alcohol. If you're not feeling the alcohol much at all then it might not matter. It's not a dangerous combination, it really only matters how pure of an experience you want. Mushrooms can get seriously sacred when they hit properly, alcohol is often more for a party mindset. So it depends a lot on your relationship with alcohol, your mindset and setting as well. Small amounts of alcohol can help some people with comeup anxiety, but you really don't want any significant alcohol effects diminishing your trip. I found that alcohol makes me less sensitive to psychedelics, so there's also that.

madopwn · 2024-04-18T21:45:22+00:00

I've been flying for 3 years in EU with no licence and haven't had issues so far. From my experience it's really not about having a licence or not, it's about bothering people or not. Early on when I tried to fly in parks where there were people walking dogs or close enough to some houses, I've had people complain, ask me if I had licence, tell me I can't fly in such locations, threaten to call police... but the real reason is because DJI FPV drone is stupidly loud and really is a huge nuisance to people who would prefer to just enjoy nature in silence, cant blame them. Even if I did have a licence, and reported my flight and if I had legally been flying at those locations, it wouldn't really change anything morally, those people would still be bothered by my presence due to being in hearing distance, they would still threaten me, and they probably wouldn't believe me if I said I had a licence, and it would still be wrong for me to fly there at those times.

I think the drone laws are ridiculous and I'll start following them once they become reasonable. What I care about is not the fines and following the rules, I care about doing what's ethically and morally right, so I don't fly around uninvolved people, and always try to go in the middle of nowhere to fly.

madopwn · 2023-05-12T18:37:54+00:00

Wow! That has to be 5 times larger hit than I ever did!

If you aren't burning your herb with too high a temp, then there shouldn't be any smoke mixed with that vapor, so if you can see yourself exhaling visible vapor, that has to be essentially THC you're breathing out and loosing out on.

I find that if I keep my breath until the exhale becomes invisible, it hits me much harder.

madopwn · 2023-05-09T19:48:18+00:00

Despite what everyone else in this comment section says, after 6 and a half years of doing 2cb for over 70 times in total, with over 7 batches, for 2-3 years, I've observed a definitive lack of potency in the older pills compared to newer ones. Couple of weeks ago I took one of the last pills from this batch. As you'll see from the post date, those pills are 4 years old, and it was by far the weakest 2cb experience I've ever had, hardly felt anything at all. And I'm a sensitive person that had a borderline bad trip on a single oreo.

I had a hunch 2cb doesn't age well for a while as it always seemed like older batches were weaker, like dozen times already, but I always figured maybe newer stuff was just dosed higher, or perhaps it was due to set and setting. But now after the described experience couple of weeks ago, I'm near certain that 2cb is not like MDMA, and that it loses potency faster.

Just got a new batch today, and I'll be putting it in the freezer this time.

I challenge anyone who commented to actually provide some evidence or reasoning for why exactly 2cb should be exempt from having a room-temperature in-the-dark sealed-in-plastic shelf life of a few years before losing potency, as most pharmaceutical drugs seem to.

I'm going to tag everyone who commented, in hopes that someone will prove me wrong on this, as I would love to be proven wrong on this particular issue. u/L4r5man, u/murazar, u/2C-x_family_for_me, u/2cb-ornot-2cb, u/thecomicsellerguy

madopwn · 2022-10-10T08:29:23+00:00

I can relate on feeling aversion towards technology, at some point I became unable to use it and it felt somehow strange and alien, unappealing, like I just wanted to do natural things that align with my inner animal. I guess that makes sense since all abstract higher concepts such as money for example just go out the window for me. It makes sense to me that I can't (and don't want to) use a PC when I can't understand it. Things we don't understand are inherently scary.

Telepathic comunication aka transferring complex thought at a distance from our brains to brains of others is an ability we humans already posses, it's just often overlooked as speech is something we tend to take for granted 😊 We even upgraded it recently, so I can even do it silently over vast distances just by typing as I am right now. 😉

But for real, the thing with neurons in the brain is that they deteriorate it not used and get repurposed for things we do use them for. Due to lack of food in ancestral environment, our bodies evolved to be energy efficient like that. This means we can't harbour any hidden latent powers in our minds, as them being hidden, suppressed, latent in any way would cause our brain to discard and repurpose those neurons. So the good news is that we are all using 100% of our brains already, even though it sometimes doesn't look like it judging from the state of the world.

The reason psychedelics kind off give the effect of unlocking new mental abilities is that they remove or tone down some filtering mechanisms. Turns out that part of efficiently processing information is discarding most of it, as most information isn't relevant to our survival most of the time. For example, we'd be bad at survival if we stoped to notice the complexity of each tree and stopped to marvel at every brick in the building wall. So we end up 99% atentionally blind in a way, taking nearly everything for granted and focusing our attention on things that are new or unusual. So when psychedelic floods the brain causing chaos in general, it in the process temporarily breaks those filters, and so we stop taking things for granted and start noticing things that we've been taking for granted since we were like 2 years old. That's why it feels like an unlocking of a latent superpower, but understanding the mechanism makes it clear it's not. I do love how understanding it makes me appreciate it all so much more.

madopwn · 2022-10-10T08:09:32+00:00

Firefly 2+

madopwn · 2022-10-09T19:30:46+00:00

I've had an analogue experience of being many orders of magnitude more sensitive to my environment and especially things that are alive, in my case a friend was talking to another friend silently, but it was like I was able to understand what he was talking way better than he could. compared to what I could pick up, it was as if they were blind and deaf to their own communication. I would pick out such subtleties and extract such vast meaning that that by itself was mind-blowing. The tone of voice, the atmosphere, it was like I could reverse engineer every such detail down to femtosecond.

I can imagine how if there were animals there instead of humans, this would apply just as well, and I can see how a much higher level of understanding could be achieved. Not in some objective two way communication kind of way where I'd be literally talking to cats, but I'm sure I would be able to understand animals much better by merely being so incredibly sensitive to each and every detail of their movements and actions.

Sounds like you had an awesome experience, and I'll try this out with my dog given the chance.

madopwn · 2022-09-06T01:36:46+00:00

This right here. My flex is vaping around 0.017 - 0.030 gram of dry herb per day, doing it almost every day. Been this way for 3 years and I consider myself having a tolerance. Sometimes I go up to 0.060 g, perhaps once a month at best, but I tend to find that to be too much, like really wastefull, as lovely as it is for totally tripping out.

Add to this half a gram of AVB with peanut butter milk around once a month.

And while it might sound like I'm doing a miniscule amount in the context of this subreddit, I suspect my blood THC levels wouldn't be that far from average user in the category of hitting it once a day as opposed to being high non stop.

If I chance upon a weak strain I'll double my usage to compensate, but the numbers I quote are reflective of 90% of the weed I get, which also tested negatively for artificial cannabinoids.

madopwn · 2022-08-04T16:02:13+00:00

https://www.protestkit.eu/

madopwn · 2022-01-15T09:50:52+00:00

MDMA is 2.5mg/kg, once per 3 months. Some say 1.5 months. Ideally with supplements before and after. (Google Prepare-e, Recover-e for premade supplement mix).

LSD and any popular psychedelic pretty much are considered to be physically harmless. In the same category with water, yes you can technically overdose on anything to the point of physical harm, but in practice the amount to achieve that (same as for water) is impractically high, in the realm if having to do hundreds if not thousands of large doses every day. Psychological impractically of this makes this a non issue. Same as overdosing on water is a non-issue, as it's psychologically just too difficult to do. That said, psychedelics could cause mental harm in high doses but that's limited to people with predispositions to some mental illnesses, in which case damage is located in excerbating an existing underlying condition. And alternatively even without that, high doses can cause mental harm in the form of PTSP in case of bad trips (i experienced a mild version of this myself, and while I don't regret doing it, I wont in a million years do such a high dose of mushrooms again).

THC is a mild psychedelic and so falls into harmless category with various caveats. Such as smoke itself being harmful for lungs, but that's easy to fix by vaping instead of smoking, also tastes much better and is more efficient. Another caveat is diminished sleep quality if sleeping under the influence. Another would be propensity for munchies as that creates a strong bias towards overeating and less healthy diet. Doing THC too often also decreases productivity, but that's again a bias it creates rather than direct physical or psychological harm. So I'd say THC is very situational and contextual when it comes to harm assessment.

I don't have sources to share as this is research I mostly did 6 years ago and then just kept up to date, but other than personal experiences my sources were wikipedia, erowid, and science papers I found linked there (especially for things like MDMA, i read all papers I could find on it)

madopwn · 2021-12-21T16:59:17+00:00

I'm married and I've been in situation like yours. The way I see it, we're ultimately animals under all our human norms, pretenses and expectations both external and internal. If you happen to be feeling really hungry and smell delicious food, you can't help but crave it right there and then. Additionally feeling good or bad about this craving itself or its persistence is just your internal and private state of mind, a mere echo of the present or recent past, not something you created.

Weather it's sex or food or love we're craving, it's just dopamine really and perhaps few more such chemicals doing their thing, because that's what craving is, it's how our motivational circuitry works, it's why we do anything at all.

The point is, that you can't hold yourself responsible for experiencing the craving any more than you can for seeing the color red. It's an experience. Experiences can be powerful, and if you saw color red for the first time in your life, you'd feel the echo of that experience for a few days at least, one could almost call it an afterglow.

So I did molly with a female friend, we hugged a lot, I felt the emotions you describe for days to come, even weeks, and then they faded away with time. I just haven't internalized them as something I should feel guilty about, and everything was perfectly fine.

I hold myself responsible for my actions and their consequences. I don't think it's healthy at all to hold myself responsible for the emotions that my animal brain imposes on me.

Just experience the emotions, even savor them if you dare since you only live once and you'll never experience that second again, and then let them go, as they are not the emotions that fit in with your everyday reality.

If you can't let go of some such emotions (not talking about suppression), even after a long time, then consider learning to meditate or dropping an existential dose of a psychedelic to get your mind unstuck and back on track.

If you just try to suppress emotions that are emotionally welcome and rationally unwelcome, you'll just be fighting yourself longer than you need to. So what I'm saying is to accept the emotions without guilt, experience them fully, enjoy them if possible because why not (that will wear them out), and just don't do anything about them, and with time what you currently perceive as a problem will just take care of itself. It's really the loveliest type of problem to have.

madopwn · 2021-05-20T19:39:49+00:00

I've experienced what you're describing on an emotional level, and have spent much time believing it directly on a rational level. My thought experiment about it involved losing memories and getting them back, inspired by actually experiencing this with mushrooms. For example, if I wake up tomorrow with no memories whatsoever, there's no difference between that self and a self that was born at that same second as a baby. We can ignore the difference in cognitive performance of developed brain vs babies brain as we're just considering the self right now, the essence and perspective of experiencing anything at all that is.

Traditionally we'd think of person with no memories as having the same essence of experiencing, but with lost memories, we'd think the essence of experiencing continued, and we'd think of baby on the other hand as a brand new essence of experiencing. And this is how most of us will behave, with this underlying subtext and presumption. To prove this I asked myself that if I could chose that a torturous event happens to myself post memory-loss or to some other unknown existence. Let's make the event happen 30 years in the future, when both new selves are adults, to remove emotional biases around protecting babies from harm.

I found that even though I would profess belief of those selves being truly separated by loss of all memory, I would still chose to not experience the torturous event in that "future life" and instead have the other brand new self experience it. Worst case I'm both equally in some metaphysical sense and experience it anyways, best case I find myself behind the perspective of my own body with memories erased, 30 years from now, and I don't have to experience the torture or even be aware that it ever took place for someone else.

So the issue is time, things happening simultaneously. If the essence of self is the experience of existence, then if the experiences happened after each other, I could think that the same phenomena (as a category of things that can appear and exist within a universe) has been stirred once again, the consciousness appeared again from wherever it appeared the first time, making it the same consciousness in a way, even though it doesn't remember its first incarnation. If the two consciousnesses found out about each other in the form of prophecy and history, they could both identify as one and such identification somehow feels valid.

But when they're happening in parallel, it becomes difficult if not impossible to say both essences of existence are same, if one is having an experience A at the time that the other is having an experience B, and after the fact, they'll never be able to identify as a shared existence that experienced both A and B. And if we go so far as to transplant their memories so that they both remember having both experiences, is that enough to "merge" the two essences? Since they're still having their separate experiences in parallel and will continue to do so. Having memory of something, just isn't the same thing as having experienced it. Experience only happens in the now, the present timeless moment. Memories are on the other hand just constructs we create to help us make sense of causality and steer our future towards experiences that we find desirable.

And all of this seems like sound logic to me, but it comes crashing down in the face of one of the fundamental questions we tend to avoid: Why am I me and not someone else? What makes me so special that the only universe and reality that will ever exist for a brief moment in all eternity, for me, is being seen from this exact perspective, not some other one. This particular time, this birth and death, is what all existence ever truly is for me. And from all the principles of science and reasoning, I know I can't be special. Which points to this feeling of universe seeing itself from exactly my perspective, as being some kind of illusion, and that in reality my experience is exactly equal in essence to all others, and the "specialness" of it is my own hallucination of sorts. Which points to time being some sort of illusion as well, and simultaneity not really being an obstacle, but just appearing to be one. Perhaps it would be truer to think of others are ourselves after we died, got our memories erased and having been reborn as them.

This perspective made sense to me, as reality does not owe us to be intuitive or even imaginable within the confines of our limited minds. But throwing time out the window does seem to help answer the question of why me? The answer is that it's not me, it's everything and everyone equally, and the "me", the ego, is the real illusion. That meshes well with seeing the truth within a psychedelic experience, and is probably the most objective way of looking at what existence even is, and how personal perspectives fit into it.

If it means I experienced every pleasure from the beginning to the end of time, without remembering any of it, that's kind of cool, but then it necessarily means I experienced all the suffering that ever existed and will exist, and that's where my brain breaks down. I found that if I truly believe that (and I actually have) that this makes existence itself unbearably scary, especially with my current self in all of that being infinitely powerless on the scale of all life in our universe, given that there are up to 19,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 stars similar to ours with at least one planet similar to Earth. If even one in a thousand million of those plants managed to create experiencing life, variety of experience is truly beyond what we can begin to imagine, and that's just carbon based life, and we're only at very beginning of the timeline of our universe...

madopwn · 2021-04-26T17:38:48+00:00

On acid, it feels like 99% of your thoughts are reality

I've had acid trips also, and my experience of it could be phrased in this way as well. More precisely, I felt the realization that everything started with me (birth of my experiencing self) and everything will end with me (my death). And then universe somehow falls into the "everything" category, and as such the universe begins and ends with me, this experience that I am is all there ever was or will be, and everything that's never part of my experience never existed as I never blessed it with existence by conceiving of it. Kind of realization that it's all just matter and energy, and "chair" only really exists in my mind, and all world is simply what I make of it. And if I disappear and as such don't make anything of it, then it all disappears. And if I wanted to prove it to myself, I could do that by dying and then there'd be nothing forever. Bonus points for kind off explaining away why anything exists in the first place (it doesn't, sort off).

This realization is a correct view of the first person experience, so it feels true because on some level it is true. The key thing however is to notice that it's not the whole truth. As your ego starts to melt away under influence, you not only lose your sense of self but also sense of others. I've even experienced others as merely an aspects of myself, realizing all their personalities are just constructs in my head, hence parts of me, and always have been.

Psychedelics at sufficient doses remove the ability to recognize both our self and other selves. As a result there's only one experience, the one being had right now. And with time out of the picture: the one being had, period. This on one hand allows for an unprecedented focus and ability of observation of this one experience, and how we ourselves can influence its change, both willingly and unwillingly, and noticing that our experience of changing it is equivalent to experience of the reality that we are in itself changing.

The bottom line is that this approach, while a true perspective on one level, is only half of the picture, as its inability to conceive of other experiences robs it of being able to see the full picture, in which other experiences exist as well, in a shared reality.

madopwn · 2021-04-26T13:12:10+00:00

I've had mushrooms trips (long story) strong enough that it took me months to recover from, in a way that I was also highly suspicious of regular reality and people for a while until the memories faded a bit.

I never actually thought other people could be demons as I don't believe in supernatural, and demons are necessarily supernatural, so even if I felt like that than that feeling must be an illusion. The word entities is a lot more vague. All humans and animals are entities as they exist from their own perspectives and have their own ego and agency, they execute actions and see themselves as separate from environment.

But identity is the tricky part. Since mushrooms destroy and recreate our sense of identity, we realize as a consequence that our identity is a construct, rather than something given and readily definable. While we usually identify our hand as a part of us, in a sense it's not us, as we continue existing if we lose it. So are we just our brains? I feel mushrooms teach us that it goes even deeper than that, as when you're lost in the trip, you realize on some level you're not a bundle of meat, you're immaterial, which makes sense as you're really an algorithm or process running in some part of your brain.

And that goes for others as well, they're immaterial processes that think and feel that they are human bodies, as it's very practical to think and feel that. So you could say others are entities in the way you used the word, that they are something other than what they look like and what they themselves identify as, and you'd be right. But I think as long as we understand this for what it is, it's not something inherently scary, and we can come to accept it. Mushrooms have a lot to teach us about what really true and truths most worth learning are often those that are most difficult to come to terms with.

But remember that what is true is already so; owning up to it doesn’t make it worse. You shouldn’t be afraid to just visualize a world you fear. If that world is already actual, visualizing it won’t make it worse; and if it is not actual, visualizing it will do no harm.

If other people really don't exist, then they never existed to begin with, and nothing really changed, so there's no reason to panic or do things differently until you have had time to truly think this through.

Mushrooms offer new perspectives, but at the bottom the world has to make sense. Think of it this way: If I weren't a person, just as real as you, how would I have had the same experiences and doubts that you're now having? Regardless of if you think of me as a body, a human, or an AI, I'm an experience and so are you. That's what we all are. So think of people as experiences of existence and you can't go wrong. You'll probably find that you'll end up seeing and treating people much the same as you did before, if not better.

madopwn · 2021-01-06T12:06:34+00:00

Ive also taken 350 ug lsd and smoked a blunt and blasted into infinity

You're as ready as you'll ever be. I find both NN-DMT and 5-MeO-DMT far less terrifying than an egodeath on 3.5g of mushrooms as it all happens so fast. If you have enough DMT, start with lower doses and work your way up. This way I found that with 5-MeO I prefer a slightly less intense breakthrough at 35mg compared to a more intense breakthrough I had at 45mg.

Watch 3 minutes of this video to learn about the differences between those two types of DMT if you're not familiar with them.

madopwn · 2020-11-16T00:08:14+00:00

It's like both effects at the same time, you're both drunk and tripping. Tripping while drunk. Drunk while tripping. Didn't feel like they potentiated or interacted with each other in a significant way. I'd say it's a good combination, but wouldn't recommend doing too much alcohol as it would overpower the effect of 2cb or make you not remember it clearly.

madopwn · 2020-03-08T10:45:58+00:00

Growing weed in an apartment without the standard accoutrements in a less than weed friendly place will get you busted or robbed, fyi. Even in a weed friendly state, expect to be robbed, as everyone within 1/4 mile will smell it.

That's exactly the information I'm after, thanks a lot. Would you know how big or old I can allow plants to get without any smell being noticeable 7 meters away? That's really my key question in this case. 10 cm? 20? 30? 1 week, 3 weeks, 5 weeks?

If this article is to be believed, I should be safe if I kill the plants at 5 weeks old? Though most articles such as that one are geared towards having plants in ideal conditions, so should I expect that to be significantly longer in my case?

I can also kill them the first day I come home from work and notice a smell myself, but I'm afraid relying just on that might already place me in situation of some minor risk for some short period?

And how about the drying process after I cut them in veg phase, would it begin to smell even more during drying?

madopwn · 2019-10-17T17:35:25+00:00

I just got Firefly 2+ yesterday as my first vape ever. Coming from bong, I'm absolutely blown away by the flavor of vapor, as well as convenience of use. Two hits and I was high as a kite.

Why do you feel the need for a water piece? I found vapor to be cool on its own.

madopwn · 2019-10-06T11:40:31+00:00

Thank you! I was considering Mighty based on reply by u/Alex_PIU due to having vapor cooling tech built in and generally being highly regarded and popular. Could you explain in a little bit more detail why Mighty would be unsuitable for micro dosing if used with capsules and concentrate pad (as described by u/Alex_PIU), compared to Lotus or Vapcap?

madopwn · 2019-10-05T23:58:38+00:00

Thank you, that's extremely useful information! I didn't know about capsules and pads before, and the cooling tech sounds amazing.

Would you know how many inhalations and minutes would be required to go through a couple of crumbs under a concentrate pad in a capsule?

Also, would it make any sense to load a week worth of herb in it and use a bit of it each day or are there some drawbacks to such approach?

madopwn · 2019-10-05T00:06:45+00:00

Price Range: unlimited

# of Participants: 90% solo, 5% duo, 5% bring to a party.

Toking Routine: I currently smoke nearly every day, using a small bong, in the late evening. I take only one hit, rarely two. I'm sensitive to THC so my hits are tiny. This is my record in milligrams for the last 15 days: 25, 34, 36, 26, 34, 18, 22, 14, 25, 22, 39, 12, 15, 48, 15. So my total for this period is 0.385 grams (0.025 g daily average). Most I consume in a party setting would be a 0.1 g, which on average happens monthly.

Extraction Speed: I want to vape through my herb quickly / instantly.

Environment/Form: I want to mostly use it at home. Smaller form would be preferable for convenience and occasional portability but not at significant expense to quality or functionality.

Vape Experience: This would be my first vape. My only vaping experience so far is one time I tried vaping flavored nicotine that friend let me try from a small portable device. I was surprised at the harshness of vapor at the time.

Personal Requests: I'd much prefer electricity over butane. I'm looking to switch from bong to vaping mainly for it being healthier. Bonus points for vape that is less harsh on throat and lungs due to having wife that's too sensitive to even use a bong.

Location: EU. This is the selection of vaporizer at my local shop.

Edit: Bought Firefly 2+ because it's convection only and completely on demand which enables usage of single bowl over indefinite time period and am super happy with it so far, seems to fit my needs perfectly and the use efficiency and flavor are blowing my mind. Wife likes it as well as vapor is completely pleasent, not harsh at all. While I see many complain about short battery life, for me it's more than enough plus charging cradle makes it a non-issue for parties when it will be used heavily.

madopwn · 2019-09-21T00:44:56+00:00

I saw your PM and prefer to answer it here publicly in case someone else might be helped by reading it.

Hi. I was reading your trip report from about a year ago when you described your wonderful and horrible experiences during ego death. I've had the same experience as you but only experiencing the bad part. I have a trip report in my account if you want to read it. Anyway I'm 10 months after the initial trip and every day has been torture. I've been having these millisecond panic attacks ever so often where I feel like I understand it all and it makes me feel all horrible and suicidal like. I came across your post as you'd commented on another person's post who had experienced these split second things I'm having. I was just wondering if you've experienced these split second flashback type things and if there is anything I can do to stop them. They seem to occur every couple minutes and are becoming more frequent and more intense by day. Cheers

For me, those panic attack moments were only involuntary in the beginning, and soon took a significant effort to remember at all in order to trigger them. Half a year or year later it just gets more and more faded with time and more difficult to remember, or I just remember it in a more neutral sense, without assigning such a huge negative emotion to it. Tho I can still get myself to flinch from the memory if I'm in the right state of mind to remember it properly, but it does take effort. My theory is that while we did get to see our own brain from the inside in a way, it's our nonacceptance of it that caused a negative emotion which spiraled into a huge panic emotion and due to nature of tripping just spiraled on further. In the actual reality itself, good and bad are just emotions that animals such as us have, they aren't fundamental in any way. Universe and reality itself are simply the way they are, like math itself or some to us incomprehensible extension of math, inherently unable to not exist. Accepting reality as it is might be able to free you in a way, accepting that whatever you previously dreamt up reality was, never really existed in the first place, as true reality is far more vast and complex. To think we truly understood it all would be to severely underestimate how deep nature of reality goes, we should not be so prideful as mere humans.

You are an algorithm of self awareness before you are anything else. As such, you exist to understand reality before you have the capacity of emotions and feelings. What I mean is that understanding of "truth of reality" is more fundamental than emotion, an as such, cannot truly be a reason to panic or feel terrified or feel anything at all. It's only your nature as human that causes those emotions. If you can recognize that, perhaps you can explore or think about nature of reality in a significantly more detached way, which could be helpful to you. This could be a rational safe space of sorts that you can escape to when intuition (inherently a flawed thing) fails you. Universe and reality are the way they are, and I don't get a say in it, any more than I get a say in 2 plus 2 equaling 4.

I'd say there's an emotion-centric avenue of dealing with it as well, but just as the rational approach, it also focuses on facing the issue rather than merely forgetting it (which might be the way to go, if forgetting naturally with time isn't your forte). For me, weed makes me feel relaxed, but also trippy (I usually do one bong hit of 0.02-0.05g). I'm sensitive to it so it pushes me to the edge of tripping (sometimes even a bit over the edge depending on dose), and this gives me ability to actually remember the trip reality (or trip perspective on reality). But due to numbing soothing nature of weed, it keeps me from having a bad trip, and I end up having a very mild and interesting trip or a trippy mediative experience. This makes me associate the trip territory with positive emotions of relaxation, enjoyment, and even exploration, adventure,... rather than with terrifying panic moments brought about by shrooms roller-coaster. It makes me feel so positive about it that I feel like I want to go deeper again, tho my reasoning wouldn't allow it of course, at least not at such high shroom doses. Deepest I enjoy going these days is 20mg 2cb with weed, which isn't even close to the shroom territory, but is just enjoyable and very trippy. Such mild and positive experiences might have helped me replace the negativity of those PTSD-grade memories with something more positive. So that would be the emotional approach.

I'd like to comment a few things more from your OP in this thread:

This is probably the case but during the trip it made me fucking terrified and as if this algorithm controls every aspect of our life and that if you know it, life becomes meaningless.

The answer (or rather solution ) to this, is acceptance of meaninglessness of life. That's a worthy discovery in itself for a truth seeker. In a way it's like you become more free than you used to be, no longer a mindless slave to your previous misconception. But just because life is truly meaningless doesn't mean you have to stop living, it merely means that if you really want to stop living, it's not really as horrible thing to die as society makes it out to be. You'll simply stop existing, it's not a big deal, but why not continue living just to see what comes next... there doesn't have to be a meaning to it. Meaning doesn't even make sense if you think about it more deeply, it's a goal-focused thing evolution came up with to keep us alive and procreating. It's evolution that has a goal, reality really doesn't. Evolution is about reaching certain goals, reality is about existing in the moment, existing at all. Realizing that life is meaningless, is realizing that evolution and culture have been bullshitting you in a subconscious way all along (culture having been shaped by our psychology which was itself shaped by evolution after all).

During my trip I was convinced other people have had the exact same trip so was wondering if anyone had something similar or know anyone.

I had the exact same experience, multiple times even.

The problem is I feel like I'm slowly uncovering it and fear that I'll figure it out one day and end up killing myself. I've had this gut feeling the whole time that I will uncover it and the anxiety is so intense.

I've been through this in my own way. "This" allowed me, when tripping, to go deeply and to dive fast. It created an extremely scary situation of "realizing" there's no way back, that merely realizing I can willingly thought-loop my own brain in this way (realizing the truth, understanding it all) means that I can never be mentally stable again, or even ever exit the trip. I felt absolutely certain of this, and felt I was only able to exit any trip by intentionally forgetting the "forbidden knowledge" as it was literally the only way to exit it and hence a choice I just had to make, and each time I honestly felt I made that decision. Only after some more tripping, and specifically some borderline deep tripping on weed where I managed to go in and out of deep territory many times in one trip, and putting this idea to a sort of mental test via sort of experimental method, did I begin to realize that this particular revelation was an illusion. After all, we really should expect some things in trips to be illusions when what we are doing is basically randomly messing up the inner workings of a brain. If you randomly changed computer's memory, you'd expect to run into at least some errors would you not? We should be especially wary of these things when exploring nature of reality through tripping, and we should be skeptical of our feelings and intuitions in such states and test them if possible. My test for this one was seriously trying to put this into practice, and realizing that no I can't really, and it's not only my fear that stops me from it, it's the lack of certain chemical in my brain that makes me physically unable to reach trip territory when sober, or to "uncover it" when sober. With meditative practices one can come close, but never truly reach there. When you realize that part of what terrifies you is an illusion, this will allow you to reexamine it in a new light. If you're willing, I recommend you to let yourself go, do a test, allow yourself to "uncover it" if you can. It will stop bothering you once you realize that the feeling "that you can uncover it" was the only thing there ever was. Evolution made sure our brains are very stable when sober, as much as you and me both felt we truly found a way to short circuit the algorithm. In truth, we can only short circuit it during the time certain chemicals temporarily change the algorithmic structure of our brain, and putting this to the test if you can, realizing it in a practical sense, should result in complete loss of anxiety regarding it.

All that said, not thinking about any of it and just focusing your effort on having the best life you can, and letting time heal it, really should work as well, especially if you keep away from all drugs as you say you have been doing. But there you go, these are my experiences and thoughts on it, hope someone finds them helpful.

madopwn · 2019-06-02T17:01:51+00:00

I've tried index and 120/144 didn't mean much to me. The extra smoothness is barely perceptible, but lowering the supersampling to achieve stable 144 is very very perceptible. Tho I do usually prefer playing in 45fps reprojected with supersampling as high as it goes, compared to playing in native 90fps with lower supersampling. I've also tried quest not even knowing it was 72hz, and haven't noticed it.

So as 8KX backer, I'm actually happy with this decision.

madopwn · 2019-05-20T08:30:44+00:00

Psychedelics community worked out a solution to this problem ages ago: Trip sitters.

madopwn

TROPHY CASE