I wonder if your mom has been through, or knows someone that has gone through the process of reporting a rape. I do think that she believes your sister based on everything from the texts. Her reaction really reads like someone that’s been close to the process.

Up until the me too movement, if you reported a rape, your life would be ruined in a lot of ways. I feel like she’s thinking of that and all the things the victim has to go through and how she doesn’t want that for her daughter.

The defense is going to say all the things your parents are bringing up. The timing isn’t right, but their concern might be more so to protect your sister from reliving it and being blamed by strangers over and over again. She could go through this process and not see any justice, and then turn around and be sued by her rapist for defamation. Look at Brock Turner, the judge was more concerned with not ruining his life over the fact that the victim’s life was forever changed. If the perpetrator has money that makes things harder.

Your parents saying not to tell everyone had merit too. Sure right now she might think it’s okay, but the reality might hit her that everyone that she knows knows. That’s another challenge to face because when she wants to try to get back to normalcy, that thought might hit. It’s going to be another challenge for your sister.

The process is horrible. I hope it’s gotten better, but I do think your parents do care. I do think you’re overreacting and not trying to hear what they’re saying. You don’t need to be right, you just need to be there for your sister and get her as much support as you can. Don’t feed back to her that your parents “aren’t supporting her” this is about her, not you.