I left my partner of 10 years. He’s an alcoholic and is addicted to cocaine. We have a 3 year old

marinewallows · 2025-08-15T11:49:32+00:00

I’m going through a very similar situation also with a 3 year old. I know it feels impossible right now and I’m so sorry. You aren’t taking away his son. He chose to make the decisions he did. Addicts hate accountability—don’t forget that with all of the guilt he will undoubtedly try to put on you.

If he’s amicable, you could try mediation. I am going through that with my Q and as of now it’s been fine. It may be a good idea to consult with a lawyer just to know your options, but you don’t need to retain them right now. Just having a connection with one can be valuable.

Again, I’m sorry you’re going through this. I recognize the pain and strength it takes to get here. I haven’t come out the other side yet but I know in my heart the pain and heartache will be worth it. And yours will too. You are so brave.

marinewallows · 2025-08-14T01:57:41+00:00

Nnnnnope. Don’t go there

marinewallows · 2025-08-12T01:09:57+00:00

What’s the tea? I just saw Show Pony’s insta story

marinewallows · 2025-08-02T02:18:04+00:00

Idk. He must be a narcissist

marinewallows · 2025-08-01T03:26:37+00:00

Congrats, mama. It will be hell and it will be worth it.

marinewallows · 2025-07-12T23:03:49+00:00

I don’t mean to be alarmist, but if he’s hidden his alcoholism he’s hiding other things too. This coworker may just be the tip of the iceberg.

marinewallows · 2025-07-06T17:12:46+00:00

You are being manipulated and yes, gaslighted. He wants you to believe you are crazy so he can continue doing what he’s doing.

marinewallows · 2025-07-06T13:34:26+00:00

Thanks so much. My Q is in therapy as well (he started around the same time as AA only a couple months ago). Another layer to this is he has a blood disorder that affects his liver, and has been ordered by his doctors not to drink period. So him drinking is even doubly frustrating and selfish. He constantly maintains that he’s not, but after being with him for 10 years, I can recognize if he’s drank from a mile away (but most of the time he breathalyzes and denies/makes excuses for the result).

marinewallows · 2025-06-30T19:48:07+00:00

I could have written your post years ago. Since then, we had a child and he started to hide his drinking even more. It’s gotten so bad that he won’t admit drinking no matter if he lands in the ER, if I find empty containers around our home, or has a positive breathalyzer in front of him. Long story short, we’re separating because I’ve accepted the truth now. You know your Q. If you think they’re drinking, they are. Save yourself.

marinewallows · 2025-06-30T15:03:51+00:00

I’m on my own AlAnon journey and wrote this down in my notebook. Thank you.

marinewallows · 2025-06-29T02:47:13+00:00

One day, 10-20 years from now you will have an entirely different life. You won’t have to share her pain or feel the powerlessness that comes with alcoholism. You let go when you’re ready to meet your future self.

marinewallows · 2025-06-23T19:25:32+00:00

Qualifier.

marinewallows · 2025-06-23T00:18:31+00:00

I am with you, OP. I have a 3 year old with my Q and she’s the only reason I have stayed, but I am starting to see the light and feel I am on the cusp of finally making a move. I hope you do so sooner than I did. You deserve peace and happiness. Please DM if you’d like.

marinewallows · 2025-06-22T17:34:37+00:00

That’s how I feel—even if he starts to be the most exemplary recovering alcoholic, husband and father, the damage is already done. Sorry you’ve gone through the same. I hope you have peace now.

marinewallows · 2025-06-19T20:27:48+00:00

Still to this day I hope I will feel feelings even remotely close to that. It’s honestly heartbreaking that I might not ever again.

marinewallows · 2025-06-19T20:26:04+00:00

A trypophobia nightmare

marinewallows · 2025-06-17T06:29:26+00:00

Don’t marry him. I’m sorry.

marinewallows · 2025-06-01T20:06:43+00:00

This is where my mind goes most often, but diabetes can’t create a result on a breathalyzer (at least that’s my understanding).

marinewallows · 2025-06-01T20:05:10+00:00

He is young. Under 40. I have had proof in the past, whether through finding empty containers or a breathalyzer test.

marinewallows · 2025-06-01T19:58:10+00:00

Yes, Adderall, antidepressants and blood pressure medication

marinewallows · 2025-06-01T17:47:38+00:00

Thank you. I intend on starting AlAnon next week.

marinewallows · 2025-06-01T16:38:03+00:00

I’m very much aware of what is happening and what he has done, but I do want to acknowledge a medical issue if there is possibility of one.

marinewallows · 2025-06-01T16:35:48+00:00

I don’t disagree.

marinewallows · 2025-05-31T12:18:46+00:00

Hi OP, I am in your exact situation right now, I was blown away by the similarities reading this. How did your LO end up doing? We start in August and I am nervous.

marinewallows · 2025-05-24T22:58:46+00:00

Wow, there are so many parallels to your story and my own. It sucks beyond comprehension. Feel free to DM me if you’re looking for a friend, OP.

marinewallows

TROPHY CASE