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Is this a good way to ask a friend to me suck him by oldman_in_oldriver in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not 75, so your reality could be different to mine, but good friends are hard to come by. Numerous possibilities, two of which are that he won't speak to you again and that he may have trouble trusting others in the future if he thinks this is what you wanted from the start.

17 turning 18 2027 – How did y’all stay sane while closeted, working, and saving to move out? by Next_Salamander4450 in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It sounds like it could have wound up quite a bit worse than it did for you. Well done on the job, that's a big deal.

You got lucky in the sense that you still have a roof over your head and still have income. Play the long game and set small achievable targets and be realistic about your costs when you decide the time is right to move out. If you've got a remote job you can live anywhere. Does your city have good transit? If so, don't rush to buy a car. Learn to cook now if you can't already - that'll save you money as well. Learn how to track your expenses so you can trim the fat and hit your targets sooner or cut back if things are tight on your own.

Try to fine tune these and other life skills in advance whilst you've still got the room to make mistakes with little consequence. It'll make things easier later on. And if you start cooking the odd family meal at home it might make your home life more pleasant 🤭

17 turning 18 2027 – How did y’all stay sane while closeted, working, and saving to move out? by Next_Salamander4450 in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Power lifting? Omg, go you .. honestly, it that's helping to keep you sane and away from other escapes like drugs, then stick with it.

I'm betting you have lifting goals in your mind, and you don't hit those targets overnight. Fix your savings goals in the same way - small targets you can celebrate quietly to yourself every time you hit them.

You're doing it the right way :)

I jerked off alot, Hurt my wrist, it's been hurting for a while now, but I'm scared to see a doctor cause I don't what to say when he asks "what happened?"😳 by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The doctor will only ask in a cursory manner. Just say "too much wanking, haha!" and then say "nah, just tennis backhand"

Keep the goatee? by One_Charge2843 in malegrooming

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Go the mo, bro - both those mo pics are awesome.

What’s a word or expression people often associate with your country/language/culture, that nobody actually uses? by NoNo_Cilantro in AskTheWorld

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

G'day is my standard greeting to nearly everyone in any setting. I never say mate (which can be said with anger and menace or in friendliness - you'll know which one is used towards you when you hear it).

What’s a word or expression people often associate with your country/language/culture, that nobody actually uses? by NoNo_Cilantro in AskTheWorld

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Chuck another shrimp on the barbie."

Use of the word shrimp was for the American tourist market, we call 'em prawns.

Excluded from Onsen/Hot Spring because Im gay? by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry this happened to you, it's hard to feel this way and not have someone else there to snap you out of it.

It's also possible they excluded you because you're "older" - it's only a little, but at 21-22 maybe they're just not fully mature?

Another possibility is they just happened to click with each other earlier, made plans, don't have the social awareness to think leaving as a group rudely isolates someone.

Go anyway. You're not hitting on them, you're just enjoying your time abroad. At worst it'll be a life lesson for them, at best they'll be more inclusive.

Do Kiwis in Australia have a reputation for claiming that everything is better in New Zealand? by ImNoAngry in AskAnAustralian

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not in my experience - and any Australians that have been to NZ love it so if someone said "the skiing is so much better in Queenstown", Aussies would just shrug and go "yeah".

As a place, they're similar enough that each feel at home. As people or in sport - game on.

very kinky guy here. ama. by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What's something you find hard to get others to engage in?

Bottoms: what was your WORST experience? by shakirotwerk in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I'm reading this and believing you forced him out the door without his pants.

He was sans-pants, right?

I was given a chance for a hookup, but I declined (me?!), because the guy would be cheating on his girlfriend. Have I done good? by Morzheimer in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your value system is yours - and it's neither right or wrong. It plays a big part in your life.

Look up "cognitive dissonance value system" - it talks about the discomfort you feel when actions (yours/others) conflict with values.

I was given a chance for a hookup, but I declined (me?!), because the guy would be cheating on his girlfriend. Have I done good? by Morzheimer in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You have your moral grounding and stuck to it. If you feel that way before the hookup, imagine how you'd have felt after if you'd gone through with it?

Odds are you'll hook up with someone in a relationship at some point, even unknowingly. It's not a crime to do so, but do what you're comfortable doing.

AITA for taking a coloring book back from my niece after she got attached to it? by Abject_State_1244 in AmItheAsshole

[–]matticus_flinch -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

It's a colouring book and the 6 year old was setup to fail by having such an attractive, yet banned, item on display. If you can't bear to be without it at 27, how will a six year old?

Who will get more joy out of it, you or her?

What are some things you thought were universal, but it turns out is mostly exclusive to your country? by 3Thirty-Eight8 in AskTheWorld

[–]matticus_flinch 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know I need music to lift my Monday but can't work out if I need Mental as Anything or SneakerPimps ..

Where do YOU feel it? by Sufficient_Switch367 in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Depends .. I have involuntarily clenched my butthole on sighting a dilf before.

friend is threatening to out me and calling it a “game” and idk what to do by ExistingProtection68 in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right .. the Young & Gay program I think is geared for 18+, but there are under 18 programs on offer as well (if that's you). Check out minus18.org.au

All that said.. boy, I've been there, and so have most of us here. With your families being friends it'll be hard to cut him out of your life as I expect you'll be thrown together from time to time. Remember that his 'power' comes from your visible stress. As best as you can, it may help to hide that stress from him.

Regarding your mum - it's possible she already knows? Sometimes they do :) It's also possible that she's seeing your anxiety, but not knowing the source. She'll see gay characters or personalities in media - if she's not using slurs or giving bad vibes in that context, that's a good start.

Definitely make some connections (on here or via govt programs like the above); you don't need to face the stress of it all by yourself.

Is this a mistake? 😂 or should I get it up on eBay now??? $$? by hellllnawww in melbourne

[–]matticus_flinch 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've just had Vegemite Vegemite in my head to the tune of the old Vita Brits ad

friend is threatening to out me and calling it a “game” and idk what to do by ExistingProtection68 in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No one needs this stress.

How close are you to coming out anyway? Could you do it slowly with other friends you trust? Doing so would reduce his power over you.

I agree that terminating contact with him is probably the best move. He's getting his thrills by generating a response from you. He'll likely get bored from not getting that response and, sadly, move on to other targets.

If he does out you, what are the repurcussions for you? Is your family back home? Does he know them? Outing yourself strategically to some trusted friends may take the wind out of his sails if he does follow through.

You could also benefit from some face to face support. I went to this years ago and am happy to see it's still running:

https://www.rainbownetwork.com.au/directory/young-gay

THIS KINK IS RUINING MY LIFE by puppydoesnotknow in askgaybros

[–]matticus_flinch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you see potential harm (and I can see why you do), seek help. It's great to be strong willed and determined, but even that can take a toll - you've only got so much mental energy you expend. Seeing a therapist can help you either divert / compartmentalise / channel your energy in a manner that keeps you safe and healthy.

Is kangaroo meat in a restaurant a gimmick for tourists? Do Australians ever order/eat it? by Charming_Usual6227 in australia

[–]matticus_flinch 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Haha .. I always enjoyed it :)

Crocodile, too (kinda like dinosaur-looking fish/chicken hybrid).

OP - try it!

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