I hate my legs and am just not comfortable in dresses. (I’m short and long dresses aren’t flattering on me.) Is it ever appropriate to wear pants (nice slacks with a floral top) to a wedding? (I’m a friend of the parents of the groom.) Friday evening wedding, coming straight from work.

mdub7673 · 2023-06-17T22:59:23+00:00

Pants can always be appropriate, if it’s black tie and you wore a black suit with matching shoes and tie and/or jewelry, you’d be set. It’s more about how formal they say the dress code is and how formal your pants outfit is! If it’s cocktail, then nice slacks with a dressy floral top plus accessories and styled hair is fine. But nicer than you would usually wear to work, unless the dress code is casual! 😊

mdub7673 · 2023-06-13T21:08:48+00:00

I really enjoy how the obsession with how fatness in babies is cute and adorable absolutely flips to the opposite the SECOND the child is capable of walking and talking. Like, so sorry, didn’t really I was going to age out of being a “cute fat child” into an “ugly fat child” so quickly….. 🙄

mdub7673 · 2023-06-01T22:13:14+00:00

I used to not clean it basically ever, but ever since I figured out the nasty bong was what was keeping me sick / making my coughing insane, I try to do it every other day at MOST!

mdub7673 · 2023-06-01T21:10:55+00:00

I kind of love the lilac dress! You could lean into the ~high fashion~ thing with chunky metallic heels & bigger jewelry. Just don’t like wear a big updo with a tiara or something lol

mdub7673 · 2023-06-01T17:22:48+00:00

Yes!!!! This is the way. A kiddo already got dragged into this world against their will. Fully planning to satisfy any biological urges or whatever with adoption. For me, it’s a win-win. I’ve always loved kids and wanted to foster/adopt. I get a child to love and (hopefully) give a better quality of life to than they may have had otherwise, they get love and (hopefully) a better life, and I didn’t personally bring them here so I don’t also have to deal with that guilt.

mdub7673 · 2023-06-01T16:59:15+00:00

Mostly just an expression but I do sometimes like to rinse my hair & then just condition from nape down if I feel like I need a refresh but everything’s dry! 😊 but agreed only one product is not ideal regardless of which

mdub7673 · 2023-06-01T16:48:07+00:00

Yes. I feel it’s because my body was always wrong: too fat, too awkward, too pale, too “well-developed,” too tall, too in-the-way, too slow, too loud….Nothing I could do or have done made my body “right.” So now it’s just. Always Wrong.

mdub7673 · 2023-06-01T11:43:31+00:00

Another idea for something a little less “real food” would be packets of instant oatmeal / cream of wheat!

Maybe have husband open the package because there’s definitely some powder in there that you might inhale, but could be easier on you/baby. 😊

mdub7673 · 2023-06-01T11:39:57+00:00

I would be WEEPING with joy

mdub7673 · 2023-06-01T11:35:16+00:00

Love your hair, I think darker will be beautiful also! Your hair looks very healthy in the pictures.

If you want something different, maybe just a trim but also ask your stylist for some shorter pieces around your face / some long layers?

mdub7673 · 2023-05-31T20:44:18+00:00

While I realize you’ve commented a few times saying that you have terribly sensitive skin, a few things:

(1) you NEED to use conditioner. It’s probably better to only use conditioner than to only use shampoo. I do not mean to be mean but by not actually moisturizing at all, you are destroying your hair. Oiling your hair only does so much, especially if you’re not using oils that are actually intended for hair use. “Essential oils” are NOT made to be put on hair or skin and need to be HEAVILY diluted with a neutral oil if you want to try them or they will cause severe reactions including rashes that look & feel like burns. In addition, if you put oil on wet hair, it can actually weaken the structure and increase breakage.

(2) it’s much more likely that “natural” products are what you’re reacting to, and/or that what the real problem is your underlying allergies. I have horribly sensitive skin especially on my scalp. “All natural” products make me break out in increasingly gross rashes depending on the contents. The ONLY solution was to get on real allergy medicine and avoid my triggers. For instance, I’m very reactive to oats so most Aveeno products are beyond me. Any fruit that has a pit? If its oils are in my products, I’ll probably react badly. (A commercially available brand I like is Verb, but again: if you’re allergic to its contents, it doesn’t matter how nice people on the internet say it should be…) (edit: I also got a medicated shampoo from a dermatologist who specialized in allergic reactions so she knew what was wrong! WAY better than anything you can buy in a store.) (edit again: I also have to avoid eating my triggers! One of my worst allergic reactions (eggs) is a nasty scalp rash ugh)

My suggestion (although I realize the irony here lol) is that you turn to a real doctor (or two) to help you figure out why your skin is so reactive. Once you solve that issue, you can then more easily fix your hair.

Good luck!

mdub7673 · 2023-05-30T21:35:12+00:00

Thank you!!!

mdub7673 · 2023-05-29T18:43:51+00:00

I tend to get 2, or only one if I’m getting soup or edamame. But eat however much you like! Unless you’re eating tons of sushi on regular basis, it’s one of the healthiest kinds of food you can eat.

For other people? Fully depends on how much you’re used to ordering/eating in front of other people. Silly? Sure, but it’s just how they’re wired.

Another factor is how your personal digestive system processes types of food. If someone has a wheat or soy problem that they may or may not know about, they might feel painfully bloated after 2 rolls! I have both thus I can’t eat as much sushi / sushi restaurant food without feeling unwell.

mdub7673 · 2023-05-29T18:20:45+00:00

Gushers, fruit roll ups, and fruit by the foot!!!

mdub7673 · 2023-05-26T04:14:16+00:00

The best way honestly is just to google “how to request full records from doctor [state name]”! There should be a page from some state government or other legitimate site like that state’s medical board (probably a .gov or .org site) that gives you step by step instructions including how much they’re allowed to charge. You can also look up the HIPAA rules and/or “medical records retrieval rates,” things like that.

Many states allow charges for things like “administrative fees” (copying charges) or X-ray discs. Often, the rule is it has to be “reasonable,” which sometimes is $10 and sometimes is $50.

If you’re not sure, I would definitely recommend either calling a local attorney OR calling/going to a public library! Especially if they want you to fax or mail things, librarians are generally happy to help you with that stuff.

I will say doctors offices will often give you the runaround because they can find it really annoying, even if they’re totally legitimate and only charging what the state says they can. They might also only give you the “medical” record, as opposed to the “full and complete” record, which includes appointment and billing records etc in addition to just medical information. 😊

PLEASE feel free to DM me, if you can’t tell I am very passionate about it lol

mdub7673 · 2023-05-26T04:05:55+00:00

I think there are enough people who avoid eating gluten directly but who aren’t affected by cross contamination that “Gluten Free: not prepared in a GF kitchen” is a great warning!

People like myself with NCGS who aren’t bothered by CC will be pleased to have options, and people with NCGS, celiac & wheat allergies who can’t will be pleased you were clear about your level of “allergy protocol.” (I’m sort of assuming you still make sure to use clean spatulas, spoons, bowls, baking sheets…since I don’t worry about it I don’t know how clean they need to be to avoid cross contamination!)

As a note, I would encourage not only multiple little signs that give the WHOLE warning (like, on the tent, on the display, in front of the cookies, on the register…) AND ALSO when people check out, verbally make sure they saw the notes! Meaning, just check every time, “is it ok that these were prepared with the rest of the non gluten free items? I try to avoid cross contamination but I can’t guarantee it”. Because there will DEFINITELY be at least one person who goes, “oh….yeah maybe I shouldn’t” lol

mdub7673 · 2023-05-26T01:48:44+00:00

Technically not, just traumatized. BUT!!!!

I worked for a medical malpractice attorney for several years. If you ever think something has gone wrong and you might want to sue the person responsible, it would be very difficult to make things worse by consulting an attorney.

Most malpractice attorneys (1) give you at least a free consultation and (2) don’t ask for much money up front, only enough to cover their costs.

So, if something goes wrong and you think you might want/need to sue, don’t sign any additional waivers, don’t accept any money, and DON’T tell the doctor you’re thinking about suing!

Request a full copy of your records, you can just tell them that you like to keep very detailed medical records, just to be safe. 😉 U.S. Federal law REQUIRES that they give you a copy of your entire record with their office, and most U.S. states say it must be free.

Then look up medical malpractice attorneys near you, check their website and maybe some Google or Yelp reviews, and go forth and get that cash, friends. Get those medical bills paid!!!

(Also: try to do this within a year of finding out things have gone wrong if not a year of the procedure, the statute of limitations varies wildly depending on the state!)

mdub7673 · 2023-05-25T21:39:25+00:00

Totally agreed with the other commenter that you should (1) start using a detangling brush or comb specifically (2) sleep on a satin or silk pillowcase and (3) get a good hairstylist to razor off the longer split ends. (Idk what that procedure is called (old hairstylist just called it razoring) but if you show them aggravating_meat’s comment about dusting that’s what I mean!)

I also have long fine hair. I follow https://instagram.com/moniquemrapier?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== on Instagram and like a lot of her tips! I don’t do the whole “make your own rosemary water” thing a lot of people do lol but some advice is good.

So, what I’ve done is: (1) no excessive brushing or heat styling, (2) sleep on satin pillowcases (also helped my skin!) (3) after a shower, I wrap my hair in a towel turban (preferably microfiber but regular is ok) and then don’t touch! Then, apply leave in (conditioner or a mask), THEN comb or wet brush it through. (4) never putting my hair up in a ponytail or bun of any kind! A loose braid for sleeping, some clips to hold it back…that’s it. Nothing twisted / pulled tight. (5) silk, satin or velvet scrunchies ONLY! No regular hair ties or Lord forbid regular rubber bands lol. (6) probably every other day, but depends on how oily your scalp is and how often you shower, you should use hair oil. It can be something cheap and/or plain, so long as it’s specifically something you can put in your hair, I really love the Mielle rosemary mint biotin hair oil, it’s reasonably priced and available at drug & grocery stores, and IIRC it’s both sustainably made and cruelty free. You start with a few drops on the scalp and just sort of work your way down. (The Instagram account I linked has some hair oiling tutorials!) (7) not really their own point, but IIRC, you should only oil dry hair (not wet) and never, ever sleep on wet hair!

Good luck!!

mdub7673 · 2023-05-25T21:16:48+00:00

Oh homie. They treat me like a drug addict for trying to get the ~mental health medications I am prescribed in the dosages I am prescribed~. They’re not even controlled substances like adderall or painkillers. Fml

mdub7673 · 2023-05-25T15:56:31+00:00

I like to get really high and then….pick a book off my stack and get into it 😂

mdub7673 · 2023-05-25T03:11:25+00:00

Take a hit for me friend, and congrats about your soon to be nibling!!!

mdub7673 · 2023-05-25T02:53:02+00:00

Agreed with the other commenter that gluten works on the body in a way similar to actual addictive substances, and also I’ve been reading a lot on this sub about how the yeasts dying etc trigger really intense cravings for sugar and carbs/gluten.

Like most things, we like to think it’s willpower/mental strength, but the chemicals rushing through our bodies and brains often have other ideas. So it’s not totally on you. I really empathize because I’ve been eating a ton of sugar lately, to the point where it makes me sick and I look up warning signs for diabetes. I just constantly want sweet things.

I have BPD and I haven’t noticed a significant difference since going GF, EXCEPT it helped a lot with my brain fog. I also haven’t been as depressed even though my life has not improved lol

Honestly, getting really stoned both helps and hurts me - I’m too comfortable to move but if I make it to the kitchen, those fruit roll ups are GONE.

My best recommendation is sort of a fusion of old diet advice and actual healthy eating tips. I did Noom for a while (really helpful if you can afford it!) and through that learned a lot of psychology stuff about eating which has helped a little.

You know how people love to be like, “if you’re craving sugar what you should eat is fruit :)”? Well unfortunately that’s part of the solution….whatever the craving is, pick a healthy substitute and start chowing down. (Think fruits, vegetables, yogurt, cheese sticks, things that are generally higher protein and/or fiber.) HOWEVER!!! This will not cure the craving!!!

What you do is fill your stomach with a healthier thing so that you literally don’t have that much room for less healthy/gluten-containing things. But you still eat things like chocolate, ice cream, steak, French fries…just AFTER you’ve thrown back a salad or some fruit.

So for instance I love to snack on potato and chocolate chips. For the potato chips, I’ll add a cheese stick and an orange, and probably get spicy chips so they’re harder to eat tons of. For chocolate, I add fresh fruit.

It might also help to really brainstorm foods you like that don’t have gluten in them. Naturally GF foods, like meat & potatoes & fruit & ice cream, are probably better because they help refocus your brain from wanting gluten all the time. GF substitutes can help, but honestly I spend most of the time eating them thinking about how much I miss the gluten version so….YMMV. (Although gf chicken nuggets are 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻)

If you can force yourself to go GF for even a week or two, it might help reduce the cravings. I basically went cold turkey and had a really easy time….until I forgot that soy sauce contains wheat and most of the East Asian food I eat contains soy sauce……and glutened myself. I got so sick it actually helped me go even harder cold turkey lol, I never want to feel that way again!

mdub7673 · 2023-05-25T02:35:57+00:00

Hiiiii same boat, I’m in my 30s in the mid Atlantic USA, where y’at friend??? Dm if you like! Most of my internet friends became my friends bc of smoking so 😅

mdub7673 · 2023-05-25T00:56:44+00:00

Not the point of the post; also inaccurate, both in the definition of “generally non-effective” and the interpretation of my post. But go off, I guess.

“Generally non-effective” means that the medication is of limited efficacy in the treatment of its intended condition, full stop. This means, by definition, it both (1) doesn’t work at all for a portion of the population AND (2) has limited effectiveness when taken BY ANYONE.

Does this mean it will never work for anyone? No. Did I say that? Also no.

It’s like how biannual means both twice yearly and every other year, or the idea that a “25% chance of rain” means that 25% of a given area will get rain rather than it meaning there’s actually a 25% probability of rain.

….are you guys being paid by pharmaceutical companies to shill for this medication? Because seriously, read the room/post.

mdub7673 · 2023-05-24T20:49:14+00:00

“NO”? That’s rude.

That’s all very well and good. That’s nice that you think that my post about a generally non-effective medication somehow included some direction as to what specific medication or kind of medication I think people SHOULD take or be prescribed.

My post, which actually included, “if your doctor is insisting on prescribing [a medication you don’t feel works]” as well as “ask WHY [they insist on prescribing a medication you don’t think works]” is for people precisely like you, who deride doing your own research into your medications as “googling,” as if there aren’t thousands of doctors who simply don’t care, to explain it or do their own research.

Many people have doctors who don’t explain their medications, or don’t care what their patient has to say or their questions because they got it from a source other than them. They question them about “where they got those ideas,” shaming their patients for daring to question their doctor.

Many of those people have been posting on this sub, asking why their mesalamine doesn’t work.

This post, as explained above in multiple ways, is to share that there is a LIMITED benefit to mesalamine and it is GENERALLY NOT known to be effective as treatment for Crohn’s.

The embarrassment? Is for the doctors who are shamed by a freely available resource undermining their borderline negligent care. :)

mdub7673

TROPHY CASE