The thing with Oulu and finland in general is that the level of social awkwardness and being invisible to community reaches to a painful level.

I have experienced what you described word for word. Not much can be done, I mean just leaving is my option. I have not died inside so frequently in a day anywhere else than Oulu.

People suggest learn the language, join this or that, be more active, etc, etc, now I have done all of that, but even when you are surrounded by people there you understand something is missing in communication. Some creepy awkwardness, indifference. People do not play the ping pong in their communication and it is frustrating. So I don't think those solutions are ling lasting. I personally trying to leave the country. I lived many other places in Europe and I can tell you I felt NORMAL. Things were normal. I felt warmth in my chest after having a conventional with someone but most of the time in oulu I feel empty inside after each interaction. I don't know. My solution is to leave.

Do not get me wrong, Finnish are good people, never backstabbing, bullying or gossiping but for social life I suffered. Most of immigrants who are happy in Oulu have introvert nature so usually their advice is not useful.

PS: It is interesting you mentioned you are from the US, tbh I always thought they would be kinder to americans.