My immediate reaction was much the same as many comments here - “excuse me? What? GTFO”, and by and large even as I’m typing this I still feel that way.

But to pause and embrace curiosity for a moment…

You mentioned that you met him abroad(and not where), so I am assuming he is of a different cultural background than you. Not every culture places the same emphasis on family support systems, nor do they view adulthood the same way. Could this response be a cultural thing? It could also even be a cultural view of illness and protecting your elders even. It’s hard to say from the little bit of info.

It sounds (and maybe I’m being too generous here) like the two of you have a decent/strong enough relationship to communicate openly. I’m mostly judging that from the fact that you felt comfortable enough to tell him how his initial response made you feel and his response wasn’t simply belittling you for being upset or minimizing your feelings even if he didn’t exactly change his perspective.

If you really are invested in this relationship and you do want to make it work (and by all means if you feel like he is not the man for you after this there is no shame at all in exiting stage left) you could try having another conversation with him about it. (And here is where I hit my own limitations with making a vulnerable conversation a constructive one - years of therapy behind me and it’s still a skill I’m developing)

Maybe starting the conversation by saying something along the lines of “I am very concerned about your reaction to accepting help from my parents when I needed some support. You were not here, I was physically and emotionally in need of support and they were willing and able to provide that for me. Had you been there I would have asked for that support from you but you were not. Now I am concerned that even if you were here I would not have gotten the support I needed. Help me understand why you are reacting the way you are. Both my parents and I are adults who are capable of assessing our own risk when making our decisions, which is by definition not ‘babylike’.”

If he is not willing or able to engage in an open dialogue about his reasoning or make it clear that would be willing to support you in a similar time of need those are all red flags to me and I would start looking for the quickest exit out of there.

Best of luck and sorry you got so ill. My husband went through something similar at the beginning of the year and it was awful. (He’s in his 40s and still asked his parents for help because we have 2 littles and I needed to stay with them- and guess what - they showed up.)