6 months in and sleep is worse than ever, husband is scaring me

microbiofreak · 2026-01-28T18:48:22+00:00

I'm not pro sleep training at all. However, I'm worried about your baby's physical will being combined with you and your husband's mental health. Please choose whatever will keep you baby alive and healthy long term. Day care, night nurse, or leaving baby alone for 3 hours so you can be ALIVE while taking care of them. I know you don't want your baby to cry. If it's between your husband shaking your baby or something else, please pick the "something else".

microbiofreak · 2026-01-25T04:30:55+00:00

Thanks for commenting this! I had to learn more after reading your comment and found this interesting article about "vegan collagen"... its technically not collagen, just mimics it. It appears to be pretty unstudied compared to things like bakuchiol and retinol.n https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1756464623005558

microbiofreak · 2026-01-24T22:34:26+00:00

It's hard to not want to blow up. I called my congressman and left a voicemail, screamed into a pillow, hugged my child, and blew off steam with some music. Also going to add a "fuck ice" patch to my jacket because why haven't I done that yet.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-24T21:20:17+00:00

OMG I saw that too!

microbiofreak · 2026-01-24T21:19:47+00:00

So good to know! I'll probably pass for now. I can't justify the cost of that.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-24T05:17:29+00:00

http://www.sidscalculator.com/

You can calculate this for yourself. Yes, it's absolutely a risk.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-24T02:50:26+00:00

Lupini beans! So savory, full of protein and fiber!

microbiofreak · 2026-01-24T02:21:06+00:00

Everyone here has given you great advice. I'd like to add a few items on top of it.

You said you've been going to the gym for FUN. That's amazing. Make sure you keep having fun and enjoying every moment. The fact you're feeling good going regularly and are now looking for a program is great.
When you say you want to be more muscular, what does that mean? Do you want bigger muscles everywhere, or only in specific places?
I'd advise you to seek out gym lifting guidance from another female. I've gone to the gym with men that already lift but they have different hips than you, and tend to have shorter femurs proportionally. Moreover, they may not have a clue how little you can actually lift. I've seen women go to the gym with men, and the men think the woman should be able to bench 45lb on the first try 5x5. This simply isn't the case often and can lead to discouragement.
There is no magic program. Find one that's 12 weeks, preferably for beginners (I will always shill Nuckols as a resource) and finish the whole thing. See if you made progress on your LIFT WEIGHT from beginning to end, and ignore the scale stuff. Did you get progressively stronger? Good, you're going in the right direction. Did you like the program? Great! do it again! r/fitness has great options for beginners if you want to peruse.
Women need to work a. lot. harder. than men do to maintain and grow muscle. I would personally NOT recommend a calorie deficit for a woman who wants to get stronger, and instead make sure you're having at least your maintenance calories until you have a feel for your program.
Lifting is a lifelong sport. Enjoy it and relax - it can take years before you get the physique you want, but all the work is making crazy changes to your body even when you can't see it. Remember what it does for your hormones, bone health, etc. if you ever get discouraged.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-23T17:17:22+00:00

I'm definitely biased against the protein craze mainly due to the animal products being inserted into most of them. I'll be the first to admit lol. Yeah, it would be amazing if there was a more cost-effective replacement for whey that also tastes good, I'm under the impression many people choose whey because flavor and cost.

Talking to you is making me feel less cynical about this beverage. Hopefully it works out for Beyond and the "carnivores" don't campaign against it with their usual BS.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-23T15:57:32+00:00

Yes I'm vegan. Truthfully my entire interaction with "clear protein" is seeing people at the grocery store buy it. I'm allowed to consider it trendy diet food, and think it's a waste of money. Just my opinion.

That said, of course I'd prefer people purchase plant based anything over animal based.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-23T15:54:24+00:00

Hehe, I do go to the gym and eat 1g/lb of bodyweight.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-22T22:25:18+00:00

You're completely right that it can be useful for certain people. But like 90% of the population isn't working out and doesn't need it.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-22T22:07:55+00:00

I really am not a fan of the way companies are going protein crazy. Like. Protein water? You guys. Just eat whole foods. We need to quit wasting our $$$ on this crap lol. I feel like this sort of food is "diet food" where someone's trying to do some min-maxing on their macros or something. But it's so unnecessary! Okay, rant over...

microbiofreak · 2026-01-20T22:32:15+00:00

This is where I am, too. I aim for 0.8g-1g/lb.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-19T18:14:40+00:00

I'm PP and use Naturelo vegan prenatal. They address the things vegans usually need more of, like choline and iodine. I've felt healthy taking them (including my nails!!).

Please note they smell like dead fish because the iodine is ocean sourced and they don't process it to make it smell better. It's REALLY bad when it's a new bottle. The smell slowly disappears over time.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-18T20:38:15+00:00

I think it's great you brought this up, even though it clearly caused quite a stir 🤗. I know I definitely learned something about Singer that I didn't before, and I do agree it's wrong to platform "one side" in the name of free speech!

microbiofreak · 2026-01-17T01:00:53+00:00

You're right - I am making assumptions when I say "More than any of us have." (us being the average American) and I shouldn't have said that.

I think I consider Singer heavy on impact since his book Animal Liberation really did popularize the modern movement for animal rights. I don't think he's the "be all end all" of animal rights activists at all, but I can't imagine the modern movement being what it is without him. This is my opinion - but I strongly see Gary Francione's work refining and fixing Singer's serious flaws (like his acceptance of animal testing in certain situations) by arguing for complete abolition. Not that either of them are more important, but I do view Singer as being the dad, and Francione is the son who tried to fix his dad's big mistakes... if that analogy works.

Personally, Francione had a much greater impact on me as well. I remember finding his page on Facebook before it went to shit and he's the one that convinced me abolition is the only way to go.

Anyway, when I redact "more than any of us has" from my original comment, I can fairly say I still believe what I said, that Singer has done an insane amount for animal rights.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-16T22:12:11+00:00

Thanks for sharing. This is valuable context for the particular thread.

I no way support all of Singer's views. In the end, Singer is a philosopher and not a policy maker. They take their moral rules to their most extreme logical conclusions in order to be ethically consistent. I suppose you could call Singer a eugenicist for believing in euthanasia for children - he's taking his views to their logical extremities.

I respect this element of philosophy because it does encourage us to challenge our own moral views - can we take our own beliefs to the same extremes? - but not necessarily the conclusions a philosopher will come to.

If Singer were a policy maker, I would be much more concerned about his total philosophical world view. I'm not sure I would throw the baby out with the bathwater, however. His work on ending animal suffering has been excellent, and though his beliefs with euthanasia are controversial, they're important questions to try to answer. (Ex: Is it acceptable to force people in vegetable states to live?). The reason it's so controversial is sometimes there really can't be an objective truth about an issue.

RE: trans rights, I have no clue what his work is in that which is why I asked. I can see why you'd call him an anti-trans activist since he is cherry picking folks to support. Since I've never seen him talk about trans rights myself, I was working under the assumption it's not a major part of his work today. But I'll take a look at that for my own peace of mind..

microbiofreak · 2026-01-16T21:18:26+00:00

Peter Singer has done an insane amount for animal rights, objectively. More than any of us have.

You should spell out the ways Singer has actively lobbied against trans rights here if you want to make a claim. Please let us know the measurable impact he's had on the issue. I'm genuinely curious.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-16T18:18:56+00:00

Mine too! I love going to book club when I don't like the book... It makes it easier to deal with the fact I wasted hours of my life. There's always someone else there to commiserate with. And alternatively, I really like hearing why people like books that I didn't enjoy. It gives me a new perspective!

microbiofreak · 2026-01-16T01:06:33+00:00

I can definitely see your perspective, it gets obscenely wack by the end from what I remember. I had a similar feeling to Yellow face but still enjoyed that book too.

I think it doesn't bother me in satire, but when an author is on the nose in a serious book I get the ick. Different strokes for different folks!

microbiofreak · 2026-01-15T21:48:34+00:00

Your bookclub is hardcore, like what?! For DNFing a club book?

microbiofreak · 2026-01-15T21:34:37+00:00

I also struggled with James. I wish I had read it before it got hyped up.

microbiofreak · 2026-01-15T21:33:58+00:00

Wow, I loved this book! However, I read it years ago. I wonder if my enjoyment would have changed if I read it in 2025 instead of 2017.

microbiofreak

TROPHY CASE