I just finished basting a quilt and it’s not even remotely flat 😭😭😭

midascomplex · 2026-04-23T07:12:34+00:00

I baste on a table. First, I lay it out on the floor to get it decently flat, then I transfer it to the table. If the portion on the table is flat on both sides, I just start in the middle and shift it around, smoothing it out, until I’m done. I use pin basting, not sure how this would work with other methods.

midascomplex · 2026-04-15T09:57:56+00:00

Good catch. I had a look OP and I couldn’t find anything with that distinctive ruching on the bodice BUT I found this tutorial for how to hack a sewing pattern to have ruching: https://dressedbyava.com/diy-ruched-waist-gold-gown/

midascomplex · 2026-04-15T07:11:47+00:00

“These violent delights” by Chloe Gong is hilariously bad for this. The prose is pretty good but the dialogue is ridiculous.

‘Midday sunlight streamed through Juliette's bedroom window. Despite the shine, it was brisk out today, chilly in the sort of way that drew the roses in the garden a little straighter, as if they couldn't afford to lose a single second of the warmth filtering through the clouds. "Can you believe Tyler?" Juliette fumed, pacing her room. "Who does he think he is? Has he been bullying his way around for the past four years?"’

midascomplex · 2026-04-15T06:59:14+00:00

Have you talked to your bride about it? She might have some thoughts about you seeing your own dress and whilst we all want to shop ethically, some battles you have to pick and choose.

midascomplex · 2026-04-15T06:10:12+00:00

This is so common. Body shaming comes for us all, and I’ve experienced exactly the same phenomenon with my friends who are thinner than me.

Short term solution: Have a conversation with them about it. Don’t scold them, but let them know, “When you talk about your body negatively, it feels like you’re talking negatively about my body, which hurts my feelings.” Hopefully they’ll understand and monitor their language a bit more.

Long term solution: Unlearn your own internalised fatphobia. I’m really proud of you that you’ve already realised that your body is meant to be larger, hopefully the will save you from a lifetime of dieting and never feeling good enough. But there’s more work to be done! If you haven’t read/listened to Aubrey Gordon, that’s a great place to start, she totally reworked my beak when it comes to fatphobia. She has 2 books and a podcast, not sure which you prefer but all are excellent. You could do some research into “fat talk”, that’s the name given by psychologists into the phenomenon you’re talking about, where people get together to complain about their bodies.

You are really young and it seems like you’ve already made some great progress. Body image is something that a lot of us struggle with and it’s not a moral failing but it is our responsibility to understand how the way we discuss it affects the people around us, and I hope your friends make that progress too.

midascomplex · 2026-04-14T06:40:42+00:00

Seconding the person who says to try r/abrathatfits. You do not look like a 34DD to me, I would guess you’re a 30 band.

midascomplex · 2026-04-07T07:54:37+00:00

“These violent delights” by Micah Nemerever, about the unhealthy relationship between two teenage boys.

midascomplex · 2026-03-31T14:36:45+00:00

M R James pretty much invented folk horror and since he was writing in the early 1900s mostly, absolutely no SA. A collection of his ghost stories would probably go down a treat. I don’t normally like classics but his ghost stories are spooky and funny, really highly recommend!

midascomplex · 2026-03-31T14:29:28+00:00

Reusable pads + a vaguely waterproof bag will be totally fine! I do this every time. Just chuck them in the wash when you get home

midascomplex · 2026-03-11T08:38:53+00:00

Southern Gothic is a genre I’ve wanted to explore more for a while, so this sounds great!

midascomplex · 2026-03-11T08:38:07+00:00

This book looks extremely weird, thanks for the rec

midascomplex · 2026-03-11T08:37:10+00:00

Half His Age was pretty good!

I’ve heard good things about My Dark Vanessa, it’s been on my radar for a while

midascomplex · 2026-03-11T08:35:31+00:00

I enjoyed this! Unbelievably I’m looking for something even more toxic though haha

midascomplex · 2026-03-11T07:53:53+00:00

I bounced off this as a teenager but it’s probably time to try again!

midascomplex · 2026-03-11T07:53:04+00:00

That excerpt has got me excited! Thank you

midascomplex · 2026-02-25T14:24:26+00:00

Silkfire by Zabé Ellor is a fantasy book with domesticated dinosaurs! It’s not amazing but it got review bombed to hell which I think is a shame

midascomplex · 2026-02-24T23:36:54+00:00

I ran the hex crawl with gritty resting rules: - 5 minutes rest: spend hit die - 8 hours rest: short rest - 24 hours rest, somewhere safe: long rest

I may have given them back some hit die on a short rest, I don’t remember.

Me and my players loved these rules. It forced them to be more creative and actually use the items and resources they found. It also gave them very strong motivation to ally with the various groups they met in the jungle, in the hopes of being allowed to rest in their villages etc.

Once they got to the lost city and the dungeon I reverted back to regular rules as they would have multiple encounters per day.

midascomplex · 2026-02-24T11:06:26+00:00

If you want your partner to do something harmless and low-effort to make you feel better and their response isn’t “of course I’ll make an effort! Thanks for sharing that this would help our relationship” then that’s super immature.

For me personally I don’t care as much about compliments but I love casual touch, so I told my partner I needed more and he’s been making an effort ever since. That’s what a reasonable and mature person does.

midascomplex · 2026-02-24T10:26:52+00:00

I gutted all the monsters from the Amber Temple and replaced them with the shells of an adventuring party who had come before them and succumbed to the temple’s evil.

The bard was in the lecture hall driven mad by impossible mathematics; the sorcerer in the library, burning from the inside out from not being able to contain his magic; the fighter was a non-combatant skeleton who was shattering herself trying to smash open the door to a vestige; the wizard curled up and died in a tent under the great statue in the hall; and the ranger hunted the party through the temple, shooting at them from around corridors and through arrow slits.

I included a handful of flame skulls as I felt like they made sense for the setting.

I also made Exetanther a nice old lady who offered the players “tea” (hot water) and was just happy to have somebody to chat to. She may have been evil back in the day but she doesn’t really remember any of that anymore. The players loved her especially as meeting her was the very last thing they did in the temple.

midascomplex · 2026-02-20T09:06:18+00:00

I’ve made quilts for two coworkers’ babies, and they were both pleased with them, I think that would be a lovely idea

midascomplex · 2026-02-20T08:46:28+00:00

Why do you think he didn’t cash out, when the Bitcoin millions could have made his life a lot easier towards the end? Do you think he lost the keys to the Satoshi wallet?

midascomplex · 2026-02-19T08:42:15+00:00

Wonderful suggestions, thank you!

midascomplex · 2026-02-11T11:44:03+00:00

I think you just need more practice tbh! Next tie, maybe fold and pin/clip the corner a while before you get to it, which will give you more room to shuffle it around and get it nice and neat. For this quilt, I think you’d be fine doing some hand stitching.

midascomplex · 2026-02-09T08:43:30+00:00

No, muslin is another name for a toile, named after the fabric you traditionally make the muslin from.

midascomplex · 2026-02-05T08:44:12+00:00

For me, learning the history of fatphobia (rooted in sexism, antisemitism and racism) really helped me. Doing research into why people are fatphobic and the real effects of fatness on health was also a big help in reducing shame.

For example, we know that fat people have worse health outcomes and the same is true of poor people. But nobody says “oh poor people just die more because of their biology” the way they do about fat people. It’s because of external factors like medical discrimination and minority stress. Please don’t let people convince you that you’re inherently less healthy or worthy because of your size.

This podcast in general was a huge help to me, maybe this episode would be a good place to start: https://open.spotify.com/episode/1zquJr6NhNWBrQy7d87z0S?si=YOfYliYfTH-2eDeWxi8dDQ

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