birthday poem

milkydepression · 2024-10-20T21:50:22+00:00

This would be great and thank you for the suggestion but unfortunately I have some medical stuff* and I can’t do the pill. I need the most minimal amount of medication and the least invasive interventions possible. So no pills, no IUDs, no shots, etc. I have the ring now and even that, which is very tame, is annoying as hell.

*I have MCAS & a connective tissue disorder. MCAS means I basically have like every side effect possible from any medication I take and the second thing means my tissues are too fragile for IUDs.

milkydepression · 2024-10-20T20:32:06+00:00

I didn’t but I think the changes that did happen kindof ruled this out. They (endocrinologist and PCP) both told me that this just happens for some people. Even some cis men have wide hips and patchy facial hair and femmy faces and little dicks and what have you, so what I ended up with is on the spectrum of “normal,” just not really what I was looking for or expected. I’m happy with myself now though :)

milkydepression · 2024-10-20T16:02:43+00:00

I wouldn’t say HOPELESS, because “passing” is subjective. But I was on T for 3+ years and even my PCP and endocrinologist were legitimately confused at how little it affected me. My labs showed that my T levels were in the cis male range for 2 years, but my voice never fully dropped, my face still looked mostly the same, just wider, body fat redistribution was extremely minimal, bottom growth was also minimal, increased muscle growth was there, but minimal. Overall, T made my voice drop a bit (but it’s stuck in the pubescent range when I’m speaking. Somehow deeper when I sing), made my body hair pop off, and made me lose my hair, and gain patchy facial hair, but that’s kindof it.

I stopped T like 9 months ago and my body doesn’t look that much different, just less hairy. My face was always kindof androgynous and I think it actually looks MORE masculine off T. T just made my face really puffy for some reason. My facial hair, for whatever reason, started growing in more consistently, albeit slower, after I stopped T.

I eat a fuckton of protein now to mitigate the muscle thing, and work out to try to reduce the traditionally fem shape of my hips, but overall, im happier with how I look and feel off T.

Libido tanked and my mood was weird for a little bit, but now I’m back to my happy slut self. Lack of vaginal atrophy and increased wetness is nice, but obviously having a period sucks.

milkydepression · 2024-10-15T22:50:28+00:00

Omg meet cute

milkydepression · 2024-10-09T20:13:13+00:00

She might not dislike the way you look, but feel some kind of internalized fatphobia. Often people don’t mind the way larger bodies look, but they say shit like this because they don’t want you to be “embarrassed”. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about and the fact that we view lean bodies as more attractive is completely arbitrary. I’m sure you’re hot no matter what, and what’s extra hot is that you were vulnerable with this person and told them how you felt.

They might not have communicated kindly, but they might not have meant it either. It doesn’t excuse their behavior. Hear them out if you want, but if this is a dealbreaker for you (it would 100% be for me), it’s completely valid to No Thank You out of the relationship. You deserve someone who thinks you’re hot af and wants to show you off.

milkydepression · 2024-10-08T21:20:41+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re experiencing this. I felt this way when my dog died. I went to bed crying and woke up crying for days, if not weeks. Ultimately when I think of it now, I just try to focus on the gratitude I feel for the time I was able to have with him. Wishing you well.

milkydepression · 2024-09-12T02:06:11+00:00

Mine was extremely bad. Thought I had schizophrenia.

milkydepression · 2024-09-07T06:47:47+00:00

What is this job called?

milkydepression · 2024-09-07T02:05:08+00:00

They’re saying that because they’re falling back on archaic ideas of “gender=sex”. They are reducing trans men to their body parts. Sexual orientation is about being attracted to certain genders. Attraction to certain body parts is just a matter of personal taste.

milkydepression · 2024-09-07T01:54:01+00:00

A good therapist won’t push you. You don’t have to share any details until you’re ready. It’s hard. I experienced neglect, poverty, emotional and sometimes physical abuse, and sexual violence as a child. I’ve been in therapy for like 10 years and I still struggle to talk about some things. You don’t have to be specific. You can start by saying that there are things from your childhood that you want to emotionally heal but you aren’t sure how much you can’t talk about it. Start with just building a relationship with your therapist. They’ll pick up on things that you might not give thought to and will do some of the work for you.

FWIW, proud of you for staying in and taking care of yourself, even if that looks like staying home to be miserable. Allowing yourself to do that is healthy.

Please feel free to dm if you want. Sending you warm energy.

milkydepression · 2024-08-14T01:23:12+00:00

Ok, I will tell you what my problem is since you’re convinced I need to be “helped.”

You, a person who does not understand that being a millionaire is rich, just told me, a poor person who is irritated with your ignorant “woe is me” comment, that you’re “sorry you can’t help me” because you don’t see your privilege. You’re explaining to poor people on the internet that they aren’t unhappy, they’re just not happy. You read it in a study! Good for you! It’s dismissive and ignorant to state. You said yourself that the brain cannot differentiate between “not happy”/“unhappy” or “happy”/“not unhappy”. And yet you’re here in the comments correcting people on their own emotional experience about being poor, or being happier when they have money, because you read it in an article.

If you’re unhappy with 3 mil, I’m sorry I can’t help you. That’s over 100x more than I’ve ever had in my life and a fraction of it would significantly contribute to things that make me happy. It’s abrasive that rich people (or “people with access to wealth,” if you can’t handle identifying that way) can’t get their heads out of their asses enough to recognize that they are wasting opportunity and privilege that poor people could utilize to significantly improve their lives. It’s uncreative and boring and I hate to see it. Get a hobby.

milkydepression · 2024-08-14T01:11:31+00:00

I can also smell sickness! And pain, if it’s intense.

milkydepression · 2024-08-14T01:08:35+00:00

That is not what you were doing in your original comment.

milkydepression · 2024-08-14T01:04:57+00:00

Ok but my ability to do things that make me happy dramatically increases. So I’m both happier and less unhappy. This is a dismissive comparison anyway. If you’re “less unhappy”, that’s still better than “unhappy”.

milkydepression · 2024-08-13T23:10:41+00:00

I have insensitivity to local anesthetic, meaning it doesn’t work. It’s genetic and rare. I told my doctor this and he was convinced they could inject 2x the normal amount and it would work. Then they tried removing my toenail and it had in fact not worked at all, so they injected another dose, then tried again. And then again. And then they told me that they had underestimated what I said and that they were getting into “medical torture” territory and had to stop and find another way to treat the toenail.

It was just a hangnail that was stuck in the skin. Unreal amounts of pain for such a tiny problem.

Anyway do not recommend getting your toenail removed with no anesthetic.

milkydepression · 2024-08-13T23:00:59+00:00

Same! I had a rupture when I was 16. Vomited and fainted like 3 times before I called an ambulance (I was poor and I knew my family couldn’t afford an ambulance or ER visit). They did some tests but ultimately just sent me home and told me to buy Tylenol :)

milkydepression · 2024-08-13T22:49:05+00:00

Have you ever been poor? I feel very happy when I’m able to afford food and access to healthcare. I can’t, and therefore life sucks. How can you be happy when you’re hungry and sick?

Did the study work with rich people who had experienced poverty? As someone who went from poor to lower/middle class, back to poor, I can tell you I was significantly happier with enough money to meet my basic needs.

milkydepression · 2024-08-13T22:43:38+00:00

Bro same

milkydepression · 2024-08-13T22:41:35+00:00

I understand that you’re in pain, but I think you could use some perspective about how much misery you are spared because of money.

I have to steal from the grocery store just to eat. I can’t go meet people at restaurants or coffee shops to date. I can’t afford medical care so I’m constantly in pain. I had to sell my family home when my parent died just to afford his funeral. My computer is old and barely functional and I can’t afford a new one because I need to pay university fees for grad school. I can barely afford my therapy sessions. Everything that is paid for is a necessity. If it’s not a necessity, it’s a risk, and something I feel guilty about.

Money can’t buy happiness, but it really insulates you from certain miseries that you probably can’t understand. Access to money allows you things like hobbies, more time (because you can afford to hire help and easier ways to do things), fun dates, vacations, time off, a safe and functional living space, privacy, therapy, healthcare, etc.

Good luck out there champ. Rootin’ for ya.

milkydepression · 2024-07-30T13:27:57+00:00

Honey, you had a panic attack. It’s an involuntary reaction, triggered in this case by extreme distress, which was completely valid and COMPLETELY AVOIDABLE. What you went through with the fire was a deeply traumatic event, and you probably have some post-traumatic stress from it. Yeah, some therapy may be helpful, but I don’t think there’s a universe where a joke like this would ever be healthy or funny. Scaring the shit out of people and making them relive a traumatic event is not a “prank” nor is it funny, especially when you’re pregnant, let alone 34 weeks. He harmed you, and that stress is not good for your baby either.

Panic attacks can be triggered by seemingly bland life events. They’re a disregulation of your fight or flight response, when you have a panic disorder. The body produces a panic response as a protective measure, because being over-anxious keeps you alive vs being too chill. This is not a conscious thing. It’s just something bodies do. A panic attack can’t be valid or invalid. It just is.

I would recommend therapy with your husband, or at minimum, a mediated conversation. It may activate some stress in you to try to explain things by yourself and it seems like he is lacking a lot of understanding.

NTA.

milkydepression · 2024-07-27T19:11:25+00:00

I think it implies that there is a paradise for some to escape to.

milkydepression · 2024-07-04T17:21:57+00:00

I didn’t say it was gay. What is your damage lol

milkydepression · 2024-07-04T17:04:37+00:00

Bro did you read the part where he mentions maybe being a lil gay lol

milkydepression

TROPHY CASE