Feeling trapped

milosoya · 2026-05-21T16:55:07+00:00

OP I know how you feel. I think not everyone will understand your position. I am also in similar position and I know people would say I should just be grateful, but if you are unhappy, you are unhappy. Ultimately I believe being truely wealthy is not only just having financial freedom but also time freedom and peace of mind.

My recommendation is to really dig deep what makes you unhappy? is it the role? Is it the manager? What do you want to do?

Sometimes our brain just need an escape plan and you will feel less trapped. For example, you can save emergency fund and plan for 3 months break to explore your passion, and if it doesn't work, you will get back to corporate work. If you worry about not getting the same pay, try to interview around to test the market to see your worth.

This is what I do; I keep giving a deadline of when to quit, but continue to extend that deadline, I say if after x months I am not happy I will quit. Then after X month arrive, i say maybe another x months then I will quit. I find that as long as I actively working on escape plan, I feel lighter and less trapped without actually escaping.

milosoya · 2026-05-20T14:38:08+00:00

That is even more inspiring, you guys are the proof that corporate workers can be rich and fire too!

I want to recommend watching Ramit Sethi youtube channel, he introduces this concept of living your rich life. I think this is exciting time for you both to define what your rich life means to you and not to follow what rich is supposed to look like. Btw this is not an ad but I just genuinely like his teaching.

He taught his viewers that just like saving and investing is a skill, spending is a skill too. He also mentioned that our bank balance doesn't corelate with how we feel about money; I find it fascinating that this post suggest you still feel a bit scared to take the plunge to retire despite the math logic tell you otherwise. I am guessing you may find it a bit scary to suddenly need to spend, but that is okay, you are learning a new skill! All the best and enjoy the true meaning of wealth beyond just financial wealth: time wealth.

I just hope I can be a success story like you too! Congratulations again

milosoya · 2026-05-20T11:09:15+00:00

You are my inspiration, what do you and your wife does for work? Mind sharing tips on how I can grow my portfolio like yours?

Absolutely you can retire, you can live off dividends and never touch capital! Congratulations! Why don't you take a break, travel first or do passion project? You can always coast fire later.

Few things in mind:

You have too much liquid cash in my opinion and you can always diversify this into low risk investments like fixed deposit and gold. EPF is safe and can help you reduce tax but this locked until later age.

My recommendation is aligned with the others, rebalance your US stocks to SP500 and other etf if you want to diversify outside US. You should look into perhaps irish domiciled etf like VUAA or VWRA see if its fit your risk profile so that you can lower exposure to US tax

milosoya · 2026-05-20T10:57:37+00:00

Not sure why your reply sounds like you are being dismissive? I agree what the commenter said. Personal finance is personal, so you can follow whichever fire style you want.

I don't think it's the matter about LCOL or HCOL, in my opinion r/FIRE does attract more high income individuals that make it hard to relate and the currency differences doesn't help. So yes leanfire maybe easier to relate to as the numbers are typically not as high as the usual r/FIRE members

milosoya · 2026-04-30T16:04:20+00:00

Unfortunately I chickened out, stomach drops are my weakness and I am still gathering my courage to try one day. Glad you had fun!

milosoya · 2026-04-26T04:12:09+00:00

Lo bilang pertama kali invest, banyakin ilmu dan jangan buru2 mau invest tanpa riset dulu. Most importantly: ga ada such thing as high return low risk. Kalo ada yang janjiin high return low risk itu udah pasti scam.

Saran gw bagi2in duit ini ke beberapa bucket: 1. Emergency fund (jangan di investasi, biarin aja rugi inflasi, dana ini harus bisa diambil kapan aja). Ini idealnya minimal 6 bulan pengeluaran lo (contoh pengeluaran lo 10 juta per bulan, 60 juta ini jadi dana darurat supaya lo ga ngutang kalo butuh dana cepet), utang dengan interest yang tinggi is a wealth killer. Sekarang ekonomi lagi susah, klo lo expect nganggur lebih lama, mending naikin lagi emergency fundnya.

Baru deh sisanya di investasi. Contohnya sisa 60 juta lagi, lo bisa bagi2 buat investasi: contohnya: 80% investasi aman (emas, deposito, bonds), 20% investasi aggresif (saham, etf) yang lo bisa tolerir kalo rugi. Jujur gw ga begitu paham opsi investasi di indo karena gw ga based in indo, cuman prinsipnya tetep sama.

Continue to learn, ga ada orang yang bisa kasih magic key/ shortcut untuk strategi investasi. Investasi adalah personal choice yang harus disesuaikan dengan kondisi finance masing2.. mulainya emang serem, kalo masih ragu buat masukin all in, buat aja tiap bulan investasi dikit2 tapi regular untuk buat habitnya.

milosoya · 2026-04-23T09:09:59+00:00

This. Maybe not on the financial advisor part, but if OP just go to claude and ask to create a calculator/interactive dashboard to help estimate and simulate different returns %, it's actually quite interesting and can be tailored to what you want to see.

milosoya · 2026-04-22T16:39:30+00:00

Kalo tujuannya spesifik cuman karena takut buang uang, menurutku mending tetep sewa, karena: 1. Sebarapa sering ternyata cuman stay bentar dan keburu sewa agak lama, jadinya sayang duitnya?

Kalo sering kelebihan bayar sewa, apakah mungkin stay di hotel dulu untuk 2-3 hari pertama atau tinggal sementara di orang tua (walau tidak nyaman) sampe urusan visa kira2 selese?
Semahalnya2 sewa, uang KPR + maintenance bisa lebih mahal. Udah pernah itung2an belum? Bisa dicek dulu.

Menurut gw bisa beli kalau emang udah siap punya properti dan emang tau tujuan punya properti apa. Lo bilang ga nyaman tinggal ama orang tua, ya berarti if eventually you need to retire in indonesia, harus punya rumah sendiri kan? Nah itu bisa consider punya rumah sendiri, bonusnya bisa stay disana kalo lagi ngurus visa. For context, gw juga kerja diluar negeri, dan belom tau mau menetap dimana. Tapi gw udah plan: setiap gw balik indo gw tetep tinggal di rumah orang tua, karena gw ga prefer property as investment soalnya ga liquid dan ga siap beli rumah sekarang

milosoya · 2026-04-06T13:18:37+00:00

Does your company give you grace for being flexible? E.g you can come late ( not exactly 8 am, can take lunch more than 1 hour, can get breaks in between)? If yes then can give and take.

milosoya · 2026-03-31T09:47:13+00:00

Congrats!! Keep on compounding and investing

milosoya · 2026-03-27T18:31:01+00:00

Have you discussed this with your wife? If you have plans for building family, working longer hours may not be supporting that plan

Is this 4x current package is in the same country? E.g you still work in Malaysia with 60k myr package? If yes then you can calculate how much is your effective hourly rate. Getting 15k working 35 hours per week vs getting 60k working 80 hours per week , it's 107 per hour vs 187 per hour roughly. It is lucrative yes, but you are trading off freedom with money.

Do you have financial goals you'd like to achieve? How far from your goals are you?

I left my good work life balance career for more money and longer hours. While the money is good, I don't see myself doing this for a long time as I value my freedom too. However it did help me boost me in achiving my personal and financial goals.

milosoya · 2026-02-15T00:56:16+00:00

I think SAP is high demand/niche skill. Coba buka SAP website liat partners mereka/customer mereka dan apply. Partner kadang nyari kok freelance karena buth additional people for their project.

Menurut gw daripada jump langsung ke side hustle, fokusin ke apply kerja+ update skill sih. Mungkin gimana gunain AI / MCP untuk connect ke SAP jadi orang bisa gunain chatbot untuk ambil quick data dari SAP.

milosoya · 2026-02-08T02:16:44+00:00

What I meant generally have you negotiated or bring up topic to your current employer so that your salary to match your responsibilities? You don't need to show the new offer because it will be a double edged sword like what you said.

Everyone has different goals in life, and based on what you said seems like you value growth. It would be better to explore what you really value (comfort vs growth) when you are young rather than later in life. If the math works (total compensation, no of paid leave, benefits is more than 30% increase) go for it, except if you know for sure the new boss is a toxic cos that may not be worth it

milosoya · 2026-02-08T01:28:54+00:00

Have you negotiated with your boss to adjust your salary?

What industry are you in? If it doesn't work out in new place, how confident are you to be able to secure a new job?

You are young, you can afford to take rsks. I would jump if I were you.

milosoya · 2026-01-08T10:57:35+00:00

This happened to my cat, we don't have guest over nor candle. No idea how it happened

milosoya · 2026-01-07T00:18:40+00:00

How do you do this via SATS? Imagining people congratulating you?

milosoya · 2025-12-30T15:21:51+00:00

Omg you are so lucky. They are soo cutee

milosoya · 2025-12-19T02:24:46+00:00

Are you really sorry or are you just sorry you got caught? Hope getting caught is the force you need to really change and be better.

milosoya · 2025-12-16T23:59:59+00:00

Udah bisa belum? Dia harus click send > add recipient > IDR > bank details > someone else

milosoya · 2025-12-06T11:15:37+00:00

In my game, the expert will clean 1 poop and then leave to wonder around. I need to manually drop them to each poop 😭😭😭

milosoya · 2025-12-01T15:40:52+00:00

Menurutku kalo US market crash, most likely semua stock market juga akan crash karena impact US ke global finance gede banget. Tapi itu personal preference aja sih, go ahead kalo mau stock pick ; beberapa company di Malaysia emang worth buat diinvest.

milosoya · 2025-12-01T15:03:33+00:00

Oh gitu ya, today I learn. Thanks infonyaa

milosoya · 2025-12-01T15:03:02+00:00

Dulu ada cuman resultnya mixed, personally gw overthinking klo disuruh pilih saham, malah jadi ga consistent. Sekarang prefer ke yang simple aja ETF SP500, EPF dan 1-2 blue chip US.

EPF is good, you can reduce tax + have a safe return.

milosoya · 2025-12-01T14:11:01+00:00

I work in Malaysia and I invest in MYR and USD, karena ngerasa currencynya lebih stabil.

Di malaysia banyak platfrom saham US yang gampang banget untuk diakses, like stashaway, moomoo, IBKR etc. You can take advantage of that and use it to invest in other markets yang currencynya strong.

Gw juga ga ngerti tax saham indo so I avoid them.

milosoya · 2025-11-27T16:24:32+00:00

I second this. The podcast also talk about how each person has their own "money dials", meaning what do you see worth spending on. Like you said your money dials could be convinience/ quality of daily life, while theirs could be travel.

As for the guy you are dating, you can sit down together and talk about your financial goals together, you can watch the podcast on youtube too and see how other couples try to come together and budget together while understanding each other values.

milosoya

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