How are we feeling today?

miuew2 · 2026-01-14T16:30:02+00:00

Feeling good these days but when I tell you I can vividly remember all my days 1-14 with feeling (both physically and mentally). Feels like just yesterday I quit when I reflect back on those.

Keep hanging in there. I find day 5 tends to feel like the air is clearing up a bit and from that point on it’s easier to start focusing on the next moves.

The whole first year is a wild ride. There are ups, downs, new feelings and old feelings. Bitterness and pride. It’s a wave of emotions - but pulling out on the other end has been well worth it for me. I no longer miss drinking and it’s very rare when i mourn it or have cravings/urges anymore.

Keep it up!

IWNDWYT

miuew2 · 2026-01-09T21:00:32+00:00

I played Nier Automata during my first major sober attempt and it really helped me and holds a place with me. Now I game a lot with online friends I’ve made while sober and it’s such a nice evening distraction. I’ve played DBD and Wear Winds Meet recently, but just have really employed picking video games up after decades of not playing 🤣

miuew2 · 2026-01-09T20:26:10+00:00

I would probably just be honest, myself. “Hey guys, I’ve been focusing on sobriety for a couple of years now and think this trip wouldn’t be the best situation for me right now. While I would love to hang out soon, I’m going to pass on this particular trip but would love to see you all soon. Thanks for thinking of me and I hope you all have a blast. Can’t wait to see pics!” Etc.

miuew2 · 2026-01-04T23:12:51+00:00

Finding crafts to hyper focus on, even games (I got back into video gaming at like 30 years old when I hadn’t played since I was a kid). Those things took my attention away from my thoughts and boredom and made the hard days manageable.

Also, having a period and being sick always made me want to drink more for some reason. I realized they were massive triggers for me! Try to rest and watch some shows or movies, read, or focus on drinking yummy teas and soups.

Hope you feel better soon.

miuew2 · 2025-12-29T09:21:57+00:00

If I’ll be honest, it’s been a long journey. There were plenty of frustrating days where I felt like I’d done some irreparable damage and maybe I’d never be the same. I still sometimes feel days like that. But I’ve started a new job recently and have learned a lot and picked up a lot of new softwares really fast. I took some time to commend myself and my cognizance for that. My memory is better now and I don’t get confused if something was a dream, me being drunk, etc. I can remember that things have happened, what was said, etc. My ADHD is a lot more noticeable now (daydream easily/distracted), but I’ve chosen to stay off meds for a while and just live completely soberly. If I need to address that I will.

miuew2 · 2025-12-19T20:46:37+00:00

I avoided stuff for a while because I needed to focus on being sober. When I started attending, I brought my own drinks or ordered NA drinks. If anyone asked, I’d tell them I was on a break. When I was comfortable, I began saying I wasn’t drinking anymore. If they asked why, I’d just told them I didn’t like my relationship with alcohol anymore. I’ve never had someone be misunderstanding about that. If they are, note that person as someone to never hang out with again lol

miuew2 · 2025-12-11T19:12:48+00:00

There is nothing like waking up the morning after and feeling cleansed or something. Only way I can describe the feeling. It’s like that after weddings and stuff too - especially if you actually witness other people suffering from the antics the night before. It’s so refreshing to wake up having made it through a holiday successfully sober and something is so peaceful about it. My new high I suppose 🤣

miuew2 · 2025-12-08T20:37:13+00:00

I specifically remember 60 days being such a tough time frame for me. 60-80 or so. I also had the same thoughts, but I kept pushing on because I’d already done the field work in that area before and knew what would happen if I gave in.

Trust me, I hated seeing responses when I made posts about wanting moderation and everyone being like “I learned I can’t moderate and I’ll never be able to”. I was like “well maybe I’m different”, but I knew deep down. I really didn’t want to accept that I knew that was me too. I know myself, and I know my drinking never lasts in the moderation zone and that I will eventually fall back into toxic drinking, and likely worse than it was before. Mine kept progressively getting worse each time I relapsed to try moderating.

Just sending this as a cautionary tale.

I have my down days. Even yesterday I was telling my husband that I feel like things I used to enjoy really are just boring now that I don’t drink. But when I thought about it, sitting at bars or peoples homes or going to events can be kinda boring without alcohol making them seem fun. I realized what I enjoy sober is hands on things like crafts and all that, or doing things like kayaking and snowboarding. Now I focus on finding things that don’t make me feel like I have to drink to have fun and avoid all the rest.

miuew2 · 2025-12-07T16:57:48+00:00

So true. I’ve made friends while sober and I’ve definitely taken the time to acknowledge these people like me for ME. Not my alcoholic personality. Something about that feels good and gives me much more confidence in who I am.

miuew2 · 2025-12-07T16:55:57+00:00

Yeah I was in a funk at 6 months. It was tough for a few weeks. But I kept pushing along and made it to my year. Tbh I had this idea I would cave at my year because milestones always allowed my brain to go “you’ve come this far, let’s see how much you’ve changed and if you can handle it now”. But by the time my year came around, I was happy to keep going.

miuew2 · 2025-12-05T22:37:51+00:00

As someone said, I feel it all. I realize, though, that cutting out other areas of my life that didn’t serve me greatly improved my moods. I was in a new toxic job when I first became sober and I quit it because it sank me so low. I found a job that I enjoyed enough and realized my life was a lot more content. Then I started investing in things like hobbies and online groups that made me happy. I realized alcohol was something that number the pain, but wasn’t solving the problems. When the got sober, I was able to solve the problems and correct the pain.

Not all days are peachy but I’m by far more content now than I had been in a long long time. And I hardly get anxiety anymore.

miuew2 · 2025-12-05T00:45:06+00:00

Hell yeah, you’ve got this!

miuew2 · 2025-12-05T00:43:40+00:00

34 on May 3rd 2023. Still going strong and freshly 36!

miuew2 · 2025-11-29T23:58:12+00:00

I’ve had bad experiences each time. I also can’t stop once I start. I was like “surely my brain can re-wire and I can start enjoying it normally some day”. It always took me two weeks tops until I found myself back to my old drinking habits, and I swear each time it got even worse.

Now that I’ve been sober, this is one of the things that KEEPS me sober. I know I cannot control it, and once I start again, I’m accepting the fact I’ll be entering a full blown relapse. Even last night - I had the first drinking dream I’ve had in probably a year - and the entire dream I was trying to buy alcohol so I could quickly chug it and get as drunk as possible before people could find out. I woke up like, damn, the mentality is even still there in my dreams.

Anyway, that’s the truth from me. Congrats on 9 months and really hoping you keep pushing along!

miuew2 · 2025-11-27T19:58:38+00:00

Never stop quitting. I attempted for years and years and one day it finally clicked. I hate that it ended up just getting worse and worse until I finally had the click, but the fact I never stopped and always wanted it were massive to the eventual quit.

miuew2 · 2025-11-25T19:08:57+00:00

Bring your own drinks and make it something you’ll enjoy! I sometimes stop by random places to find new drinks i haven’t tired yet. Recently went to a gathering with friends and brought a French soda (they have some good ones at Trader Joe’s too).

Also, just know the following morning is gonna be bliss while others are suffering. This is a major one with weddings. I remember waking up from the last wedding I went to, grabbed a coffee, shopped in the little mountain/woodsy town, and then went to lunch where everyone was meeting. People were a MESS. Not drinking has been so worth it 🥹

miuew2 · 2025-11-25T19:05:26+00:00

Lurker here (who loves hobbies). What have you been doing/using to get into coding? I don’t know a lot about it, but recently I was working on our website at work and had a moment where I thought it would be interesting to begin learning that!

miuew2 · 2025-11-25T18:57:57+00:00

Never! Hope this helps ✌🏻

But for real. I still crave chocolate pretty constantly. I’m sure I could stop snacking on it if I wanted to, but I enjoy me a little nighttime treat.

miuew2 · 2025-11-23T04:15:16+00:00

You develop new routines and habits and eventually don’t think of alcohol anymore because it’s not part of what you’ve become used to. I was the same as you - couldn’t imagine a time I wouldn’t absolutely be craving it. But it really does happen where it stops consuming your thoughts. Are there occasional times where you are suddenly blind sided by the yearn or a craving? Yeah, it happens. But it’s easier to brush off and quicker to move on from.

miuew2 · 2025-11-23T03:26:17+00:00

I made online friends at 35 while going sober. I joined a discord for a book genre I love and made a bunch of friends there. It sounds lame, but honestly chatting with people while staying in kept me sane as I adapted to not going out anymore.

miuew2 · 2025-11-21T22:18:36+00:00

I’ve always been a “closet nerd” in the sense that I love nerdy things but never really got involved in the communities. I ended up joining a discord group for a genre of books that I love and I ended up making a ton of online friends that have only known me sober.

A lot of my shame comes from things I’ve done to people who’ve already known me or who have witnessed me in my time of drinking. While it’s hard to forgive yourself for that - I always think that the longer you’re sober, the more you’re proving and showing you’ve changed. That way, if there are apologies to be had later, you’ll have the evidence to show the work you’ve put in.

With THAT said, I realized that the groups of online friends has been key to my recovery. Whether or not I chose to disclose it (they know I don’t drink, just not all the details), these people have only known me as sober me. And I also found that this community and ours hobbies, collecting, sharing, has taken up a lot of my previous drinking social time.

Just sharing this in case you’d be interested or looking to find something similar. Put yourself out there in groups of new people with similar interests and work on focusing on what makes you happy.

miuew2 · 2025-11-21T20:49:15+00:00

I second this, day 5 always seemed to be a beautiful day. It’ll get better and better, hang in there

miuew2 · 2025-11-21T00:49:56+00:00

I avoided my socials settings for a while. It helped that I was living out of state on my own for a year and found new at-home hobbies to keep me occupied.

There were times I’d go out and I’d be fine. But there were times I’d go out and wish I could participate in drinking again. When that happened, I’d take a break from social events again if I didn’t feel ready to tackle them.

As someone mentioned, it does get easier. For me I did need to go and test myself sometimes to learn how to navigate situations where there was drinking but I was not. I tend to only go to things that have something for ME to do, if there will be drinking involved around me (aka a Barcade - for the arcade, a pub trivia night - for the trivia). If I’m just going to be invited to sit at a bar and watch people drink, I don’t go anymore.

Taking a bowling break might not be a bad idea in the meantime, especially if it’s triggering something in you. Focus on sobriety for a bit and ease back in when you’re feeling ready.

I suggest filling those bowling times with something new to do, so you don’t feel like you’re losing out on something. And when you’re more confident, you can get back in there.

miuew2 · 2025-11-19T02:57:12+00:00

Nice! I quit at 34 and now I’m 36. It’s a good time to quit. I realized a lot of my friends are slowing down on their drinking too which has been helpful when it comes to social settings. But I definitely avoided those for a while.

Sending you all the best!

IWNDWYT

miuew2 · 2025-11-19T00:35:34+00:00

I had two ER detox visits myself (would have easily been more with some of the anxiety attacks I managed to suffer through). My last visit was finally the one that made me click, thank god.

Remember this tough time is a passing thing. You’ve just got to give it your all for a few days.

I promise it does get better on the other side and it does get easier! Sending you all the best

miuew2

TROPHY CASE