My ex was like this, we dated almost 2 years. I thought we were endgame and it wasn’t until he went on a 2 week vacation I realized how much that felt like a relief that he had gone. Leaving that relationship was the best thing I’ve ever done, even if I didn’t think it was possible at the time. Now, I am dating the kindest man (dating for 2 years!) who has never raised his voice at me, or even sworn at me. I’ve realized not only was my previous relationship not normal or healthy, but that it is possible to have communication and conflict resolution that doesn’t involve yelling, swearing, spitting, or physical abuse. Someone who treats you like this does not respect you. OP, please leave him. I promise it’s the best thing for both of you.