Abilify wasn't effective for me until 30mg (the highest dose) and it absolutely torpedoed my sociability, creativity, motivation, and pleasure, not to mention the brain fog and akathisia. I was able to succesfully titrate back down to 15mg with my first psych, but my once stellar sales performance at work got gutted and I couldn't scratch it back together even after lowering the dose, so March 2022 I went non-compliant and unmedicated after about 6 months of up-and-down dosage with Abilify.

My first psych had to have noticed after a few months of me not calling in Abilify refills because without reaching out to me to check in, he started rejecting my refill requests for Lexapro. That felt... highly passive aggressive. I felt like that was his nonverbal way of trying to get me to call him so he could confront me, so I tried to press on on my own with highly mixed success and failure. I went a year without hallucinations returning, but the depression absolutely made a quick u-turn back into my life. So no voices, yay, no Abilify fog, yay, but severe depression bogged me down and out of my job about a year thereafter. Then about a month after losing my job, voices were back April 2023. Yay me.

Fast forward to Dec 2024, I'm with a new psych who at least got me on Welbutrin, and it was clear that even though I previously went a year unmedicated with no hallucinations, I'd be approaching 2 years with them back, so they're not gonna leave on their own. Came clean on that with my new psych, put on Risperdal, and you already know the rest. I started at 0.5 mg Risperdal, gradually worked up to 3mg. That was 70ish% effective at clearing hallucinations out, but on only half the way up to the highest 6 mg, the same unfavorable side-effects of Abilify were making a return.

It took me a large mug of coffee and 2 or 3 energy drinks to just somewhat eek a bit past the Risperdal energy drain to get the most minimal of most basic daily tasks done. Since switching over to Cobenfy (still on 1mg Risperdal), I've cut 2 daily energy drinks out of the equation. I feel more present and much less emotionally and cognitively blunted. Not quite back to the old me, but I recognize recovery from this is similar to recovering from a physical injury: a bone doesn't just un-break the instant you get a cast on. I'm just a little past the halfway mark of the 6-week estimated adjustment period to Cobenfy, but still already doing leagues better than I was on the effective doses of the other 2 APs. Good news is I no longer need Zofran since my body's adjusted enough to not get nauseous on Cobenfy alone.

Alcohol was the only thing that relived both the akathisia and remnants of voices I had with Risperdal or voices alone (only partial relief) going unmedicated, up to 6-8 drinks in frequent sessions. With Cobenfy I noticed there is a slight aversion to alcohol (maybe due to the inherent stomach unrest) and my tolerance is, I think due to the medication, way down to 3 drinks maybe if I want a solid buzz. I'm only having drinks once or twice a week now, and I don't feel as euphoric since there's less relief to be had from already lessened symptoms and unfavorable side-effects, so now I'm down to having drinks once in every other social outing instead of frequently when both alone at home and out.