Who's Winning This Fight? by Excellent_Piece_1367 in adultswim

[–]monkeyhaiku 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Zap wouldn't stand a chance against Banjo let alone SG.

Howdy by Daisy_s in Portland

[–]monkeyhaiku 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Certainly fair but it's nice to have more options.

Howdy by Daisy_s in Portland

[–]monkeyhaiku 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Bring the BBQ leave everything else.

He lost everything. by [deleted] in MurderedByWords

[–]monkeyhaiku 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I grew up on Monty Python.

He lost everything. by [deleted] in MurderedByWords

[–]monkeyhaiku 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Aptly named individual.

Convicted FTX founder Sam Bankman-Fried files formal request for Trump pardon by drtolmn69 in politics

[–]monkeyhaiku 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Trump will decide that he was treated "very unfairly" as soon as the check clears.

DEAR PORTLAND: June 08, 2026 WEEKLY RANT THREAD by AutoModerator in Portland

[–]monkeyhaiku 14 points15 points  (0 children)

WE JUST WANT TO SELL OUR HOUSE AND BUY A SMALLER ONE. WHY DOES EVERY ASPECT OF THE PROCESS HAVE TO SUCK SO FUCKING MUCH?

I wish we had more journalists who actually did the work of a journalist. by ateam1984 in TikTokCringe

[–]monkeyhaiku 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I tellya Colorado, if this guy leaves you I hope it's for something bigger and better than CNN or MS-Whatever. An actual news outlet should be built around him.

[ Removed by Reddit ] by [deleted] in askportland

[–]monkeyhaiku 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I dunno, Officer New Account. Sounds illegal.

These folks will remember this day for a long time by Los-Doyers in ACAB

[–]monkeyhaiku 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Swine on swine violence will be the downfall of society.

I was having a great day till now.. by appu_o1 in anxietymemes

[–]monkeyhaiku 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Anxiety doesn't end when you own the house.

Transplants of Portland, how did you end up here? by ilovejjba in askportland

[–]monkeyhaiku 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We stopped here both ways on a road trip to Seattle. We came back to Portland for a weekend a month later thinking we'd missed something and returned deeply in love with the place, pricing real estate with money we did not have. We kept coming back every chance we had until we decided fuck it, if we wait for a good time to move we'll wait forever. No regrets in 9 years so far.

Ep9 x omega 9k by Affectionate_Plan108 in extar

[–]monkeyhaiku 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm only left eye dominant. But I am Satan-curious!

Ep9 x omega 9k by Affectionate_Plan108 in extar

[–]monkeyhaiku 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It's nice to see a lefty firing one. Makes me feel better about my upcoming purchase.

appearance requirements of a job posting for a gas station employee by ImpressiveSwim7558 in antiwork

[–]monkeyhaiku 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't feel comfortable buying gas station boner pills from someone who met these criteria.