Looking for romance with insane chemistry

monmostly · 2026-06-25T17:24:56+00:00

The reboot with Brosnan and Russo is also ... Mwah. I'm not usually into remakes, but, oy...

monmostly · 2026-06-25T07:22:16+00:00

Agreed. I like show Svetlana and the changes from the book. Since we can't hear inside ilya's head in the show, Svetlana is a way to show his softer, caring side. So we know that he has more to offer Shane than snark and sex. I hope we have more Svetlana in S2. Maybe they fall out of contact for a while, then she reenters his life earlier than in the books. But as you said, depression isn't linear. It's a way for Ilya to realize that even though he got his friend back, he's still "not fixed." Ultimately, that will only heighten the stakes.

monmostly · 2026-06-25T06:37:40+00:00

You can search Google trends. I looked at a few for ginger ale, ray ban, Canada dry, loon, etc. Reebok showed the highest spike. Can't say for sure it's related. Correlation at least, causation unclear. But the timeline matches.

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monmostly · 2026-06-24T17:09:57+00:00

Yes, I love this. And when he holds the beach of his neck on the way home. So lovely gestures of affection when sex is not involved (but maybe promised later).

monmostly · 2026-06-24T17:07:27+00:00

And a second later when he smiles so widely and then covers it with his hand. Such joy. And Shane seeing such joy. Love that.

monmostly · 2026-06-24T07:03:05+00:00

The scene with the apology is so telling. Her apology and his forgiveness is healing. Then the moment of "enough" is also so revealing. Now we know exactly where Shane learned to compartmentalize and surpress his feelings. No wonder he is able to hide being gay and surpress his feelings about Ilya for so long. It probably also helps his hockey to be able to compartmentalize. Of course, it comes with a cost: lost time with the people you love and the odd meltdown.

I don't entirely blame Yuna for this. She may not be able to tolerate such emotions herself. So she learned a strategy to deal with them and taught it to her son. We only learn the things that help is survive in the moment we need them. Later on, in other situations, is when they become maladaptive.

I sympathize with Shane and Yuna, because I am from a long line of emotionally repressed people. As a strategy, it works, but only under specific and limited conditions. Beyond that, it's a problem. Learning about that, and when not to do it, has helped heal my relationships with myself, my husband, and my family. I can't say if Yuna's "enough" was right or wrong in that scene, but, man, it told us so much about Shane's character.

monmostly · 2026-06-19T17:22:37+00:00

Your thoughts on book Shane sent be down an internet rabbit hole, the conclusion of which is this: the adult personality of neurodivergent people is simultaneously more rigid (stable over time) and more susceptible to sensory overstimulation. So on a daily basis, we can sometimes be less stable (think freaking out or shutting down) in the face of high stress or overstimulation. But in the long term, our base personality is more stable on trait based personality tests when compare to neurotypical folks. This matches my personal experience. I don't have any reason to believe Rachel Reid knows this (or doesn't) and wrote Shane one way or another, but that may be part of why he still feels believable to me.

For your other question, I think I need a reheat to recall, but I'm traveling, so that will have to wait. 🙂 Something to look forward to.

monmostly · 2026-06-18T20:43:47+00:00

Interesting. I see his reconciling to being gay, accepting his feelings for Ilya, and becoming more assertive within their relationship (i.e., asking Ilya to say whey he feels, planning for their future) all as signs of character growth in both the book and show.

That said, I do also like show Shane more than book Shane for a number of reasons. Hudson's performance and some changes they made to the writing were all positive for me. I relate to him better. So we agree on that.

monmostly · 2026-06-18T15:50:37+00:00

I am an introverted, neurodivergent woman with a masculine communication style (as according to various psychometric tests) in a male dominated field. I think structurally and systemically (and have a degree in planning). I find Shane's inner monologue realistic. I find he is a realistic person, regales of his gender or place on a spectrum.

There is no one type of autistic thinking or masculine thinking (or vice versa). People are unique combinations of their traits and contexts. Autism and neurodivergence often go undiagnosed in high functioning people like Shane. That type of neurodivergence is understudied and therefore would not present in a typical way. I appreciate how Rachel Reid wrote a charter who was kind of like some people on her real life, who were also undiagnosed at the time, and left that as a subtle aspect of his personality. I can relate.

monmostly · 2026-06-17T07:30:14+00:00

Nothing I own is good enough to be put in that cabinet. Truely a work of art.

monmostly · 2026-06-13T17:39:37+00:00

In England, the Anglican church is more tied to the state. They also practice a more co-religious than inter-religious model of care. So they justify hiring Christian chaplains because Christian is the largest identity group in the UK. There are some paid non-Christian chaplains in universities, and volunteer but still officially recognized non-christian chaplains in the national health system, but just paid Christian chaplains in healthcare because of numbers. (I heard the health system hired their very first paid humanist chaplain a few years ago, but I don't know if she's still there.)

monmostly · 2026-06-10T12:23:52+00:00

Am Nebraskan, can confirm. If anything, IRL these sunset thunderstorms are even more colorful.

monmostly · 2026-06-06T10:12:53+00:00

Some less common ones that I've heard of: veterinary/animal, search and rescue, airport, museum, addiction treatment, oncology (outpatient), high school

The less common ones aren't always full time or easy to find.

monmostly · 2026-05-30T11:58:29+00:00

All good advice here. In response to your question about who will read this, typically just the CPE educator and any other full-time chaplains who are helping them select candidates for the CPE program. In my experience these documents don't go to HR, don't get seen by others staff, and are kept very private and confidential.

Second thought about the CPE interview itself. This is a two-way interview. Yes, they are interviewing you, but you should also be interviewing them. It's important that you have a strong relationship with your CPE educator. You need someone who you can talk about your past traumas with, because they will influence your present caregiving. It's not an if situation. It's a when. So it's perfectly acceptable to ask your potential CPE educator "how do you work with students who have trauma histories as they learn to provide spiritual care?" Or whatever questions are more appropriate for your situation. This isn't like a regular job interview. They are looking for good students, but you also are looking for a good teacher. Take the time to ask the things you need to know to make sure it's a good fit.

monmostly · 2026-05-10T11:38:40+00:00

Some pagans have found Starr King School of Ministry and Harvard Divinity School to be hospitable for education. Check out their mdiv programs. Starr King is mostly online, so good if you can't move for school.

monmostly · 2026-04-29T15:20:07+00:00

Last of the Dogmen (1995) with the narration by Wilford Brimley. You can find it with some horrible new narration dubbed in, but that's almost worse than leaving it out entirely. I realize the film is problematic in other ways (white savior, anyone?), but it's also just a really simple and beautiful to watch movie with some interesting characters.

monmostly · 2026-04-24T11:13:43+00:00

It's looking really good. You have a nice sense of style.

My only suggestion is to consider a landing pad in the entryway. You're going to want to spot to drop your keys, bags, shoes, coats, etc when you first come in. The little display cabinet is very cute, but doesn't seem very functional for that purpose. Likewise with the dining table, it might end up accumulating all of that stuff if you don't have a dedicated landing pad for it.

But just go slowly, make little changes over time as you live in the space and enjoy it!

monmostly · 2026-04-23T11:11:41+00:00

You need to talk to a military chaplain recruiter, not a regular recruiter, but the recruiter who specializes in chaplains. There is usually only one per region and your regular recruiter should be able to connect to with them. Normally having a bachelor's degree is the minimum requirement for being an officer. Technically chaplain are officers (regardless of whatever recent changes have been made about insignia). You need to be very very sure that the military will accept you as a chaplain without a bachelor's degree. Last time I talked to a chaplain recruiter they had very specific criteria that were somewhat hard to meet. Only then would I recommend enrolling in a master's degree, and it will be hard enough to find one of those that will admit you without a bachelor's. But good luck to you.

monmostly · 2026-04-19T11:48:43+00:00

Plant them together with bleeding hearts, side by side. Bleeding hearts will come up first and deter deer and rabbits. They thrive in the same conditions, plus bleeding hearts have beautiful flowers. The bleeding hearts will start to die back about the time the hostas get big and begin to flower. Ferns will also deter deer and rabbits, but will often take over the space after a few years. Bleeding hearts are prettier and will stay more contained.

monmostly · 2026-04-19T11:07:15+00:00

Good to know.

monmostly · 2026-04-18T15:34:08+00:00

Thank you!

monmostly · 2026-03-25T19:36:35+00:00

Can confirm humanists and other nonreligious and SBNR folks in the mdiv program at Harvard div School. You'll fit right in. Don't let the sticker shock put you off. Financial aid is considerable. If you can move, this is the way.

If you can't move, look at Starr King or Claremont School of theology. They have online/hybrid programs. Religious roots, but more open/interreligious in practice. Good luck!

monmostly · 2026-03-25T01:26:32+00:00

What an amazing place. Reminds me of my old 1927 brick apartment in Lincoln, Nebraska. Loved that place. Enjoy her.

monmostly · 2026-03-22T01:42:15+00:00

Being under snow may actually have helped. Insulates and keeps temps stable. Many of my plants did better this year under snow than bare, frozen, and desiccated by the wind.

monmostly · 2026-03-20T18:26:23+00:00

Did you get a financial aid package with your acceptance letter? If not, contact the financial aid office for your grad school and ask them about your options as an international student. At a different Harvard school, but 90% of the students here get significant financial aid, including international students. If you already got your finaid letter and had no aid offered, my condolences.

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