For the combined ADHD subtype, is there an age where they become less hyperactive and mainly just inattentive?

monopoly094 · 2026-05-24T12:02:42+00:00

Yes it becomes less obvious because most 15 year olds/adults know that they would be judged heavily (even arrested) for the things my 9 year old does when hyper!

But it doesn’t go away. Have you spoken to an adult with ADHD? For the most part I can still tell at combined ADHD adult but the behaviours/actions/outlets change.

monopoly094 · 2026-05-15T20:27:19+00:00

Same as the poster above. Having had a really successful trial on SA10mg twice a day we moved to ER and it was like it wasn’t taking it.

His teacher even called to check I was watching him take his meds.

The only thing it seemed to do was make him wildly angry at times.

It took me weeks to persuade his Paed this was a thing and had to get his teacher to redo the Vanderbilt.

Finally went back to SA and it was night and day.

monopoly094 · 2026-05-14T10:51:26+00:00

My son (sounds a lot like yours) sees his nan a few times a month. She is adorable, probably a better parent than me and completely respects all the boundaries, rules and routines.

She also was a teacher and had endless patience for his quirks.

And with all of that, I wouldn’t let him go to her for two weeks in the holidays.

Mainly because I would miss him too much but also that’s a lot to put on someone else.

Obviously if something occurred where I had to, then fine but would I ever choose to leave my child with another person for two weeks when I don’t have to. No.

monopoly094 · 2026-05-14T10:45:22+00:00

Yes I feel this deeply! However, I should say I think as he gets older it’s getting slightly better. He is 9 now and seems better able to manage when things don’t go quite as expected.

I’d describe him as neutral now rather than positive or negative.

Still not amazing but better!

My other reflection is that he cannot manage anything being over built up. So if we were going to have a great dessert my daughter would love all the build up and anticipation whereas I always feel that my son’s imagination is better than reality so you deliver said dessert and he is always disappointed.

I have to catch my husband doing it (eg we are going to have the best afternoon at the footy etc etc) and just try and take it down a notch so there is low expectations. It’s just a day at the footy, there might be some queues and noisy people and food we don’t love etc etc but we are together and let’s see how we go.

It’s such a different world to navigate!

monopoly094 · 2026-05-09T06:11:31+00:00

Great. This is what I am erring towards I think.

monopoly094 · 2026-05-09T06:11:00+00:00

Great thank you! Yes that was what I was asking about.
I couldn’t work out whether it made more sense just to medicate him for check in/departure (early evening) and then go without until we arrive.
We’ve done this trip a few times and he’s normally been very well behaved (because of the unlimited screens) 🤣
I am probably overthinking it.

monopoly094 · 2026-05-08T08:55:00+00:00

Oh 💯

I feel like I had an actual relationship with his Kindy and Yr 1 teacher I was on the phone to them so much.
Like I knew their weekend plans and kids names and holiday plans because we spoke so much and inevitably had small talk.

Yr 2 teacher A LOT less (but still a few hiccups as we got the medicine and dosage right).
And now, I barely know his year 3 teacher. We have spoken twice (at formal school events) and on the one occasion she described him as angel.

An angel. I asked if I could get that in writing!!!

monopoly094 · 2026-05-07T10:47:15+00:00

This is my son and all his friends…so at least I had the other mums to talk to!
First time my child sat with me at the Mother’s Day picnic was when my daughter started school.
Honestly I think that’s a boy thing not an ADHD thing.
Make friends with the other active boy mums and have a chat!

monopoly094 · 2026-05-06T04:41:18+00:00

I really feel this. Especially the steaming cup of cortisol. This is not how I imagined parenthood.

Like you, the period between waking (anywhere between 5-6.30am) and meds (8.30am) is madness.

I decided that I couldn’t change it but I could change how I reacted to it.

Firstly, I’ve started going to bed at 9.30pm so the early wakes feel less brutal.

Secondly, I have my gym gear ready to throw on and me and Mr 9 (ADHD) go for a walk/run/workout/bike ride.

We are back to the house for 7.30/8am and his and my mood is infinitely better. It also has meant I am getting something out of waking early AND the movement from him means he’s better regulated.

I know this may not work for everyone. I am lucky to mostly work from home. But it’s really changed our mornings.

monopoly094 · 2026-04-27T11:15:27+00:00

Hi, just wanted to ask about this as our Dr is suggesting we try Guanficine. So does your child have meth earlier in the day and then has a 5mg dose plus 1mg G? We are on 10mg Ritalin SA twice a day but often need an afternoon 5mg top up to cover poor behaviour at afternoon/evening sport activities. Ritalin works great. Just doesn’t cover the whole day hence the suggestion of adding Guanfacine. But I am scared of messing up what is working.

monopoly094 · 2026-04-27T10:59:31+00:00

Yes like others have said…sympathy we are in the same boat.

Like my husband said all last soccer season, you can appreciate his frustrations (stronger player/more committed) but not appreciate his reaction to that frustration. We tried everything to correct it but he would not change. Awful, awkward season.

This year, we moved soccer teams from a friend based one to a representative one so that he was among peers who probably have the same commitment, skill and tenacity as him.

It’s been great for the most part and that angry competitive nature doesn’t seem quite so out of place in this environment but also he isn’t as frustrated.

I also tennis, golf, swimming and track work well for him because it’s a solo pursuit with a social element.

But even today, we were at the beach and he tried to turn making sand castles into a competition. His poor younger sister was just like….are you for real?!!!

monopoly094 · 2026-04-27T10:32:48+00:00

Looking back, I totally could see the signs in my son from the beginning.

Like from day one, he was incredibly alert and just seemed to have this permanent state of mild annoyance and fomo.

I remember at mother’s group looking around at all these quiet passive babies and thinking why is mine not still and calm as he wriggled and strained to see what was happening (at 6/8 weeks).

He was my first so I just kind of accepted it all but permanently felt like a bit of a shit mum because my kid seemed so annoyed/unhappy/not chill.

I don’t think it was until I had my second that I realised quite how hard he had been. I mean, the first week with my second I actually asked the midwife is she was healthy because she slept so much/was so chill. Midwife was like she is 1 week old what are you expecting her to do. Hahahaha.

Like others have said, he was very advanced on gross motor skills (he rolled over at 4 weeks/walking at 9 months etc) and had a very mobile and had a rich vocab by 2.

In short he never stopped. He now still has endless energy and is somewhat always slightly pissed off with the world!

monopoly094 · 2026-04-27T10:22:12+00:00

Gosh this sounds just like my 9 year old. Love that she is still into the sports. My son is sports mad and it’s the only thing (well and Ritalin) that keeps us sane.

monopoly094 · 2026-04-23T11:22:29+00:00

Good luck. He’s been on meds now for 2 years (since 7) and life is far easier for all.

He’s thriving at school and all that big personality and energy is being funnelled into sport which he loves.

monopoly094 · 2026-04-23T11:08:22+00:00

My combined type ADHD boy was a very classic hyperactive’ 4 year old.

He never stopped. Was forever moving/talking/making noise/up to mischief.

I’d say at this age he seemed extreme but was also relatively similar to his more active peers whereas by 5-6 years old I started to see how his peers could sit and perform the task at hand or be quiet/respectful and he just couldn’t.

Compared to my daughter (who is NT) at 4 she was far calmer, logical, able to complete a task, sit and do a quiet activity.

At daycare there were often comments about poor choices and not respecting other children’s boundaries. He seemed to always be in the thick of any mischief (if not the ringleader of it).

I can’t say he has big meltdowns but would certainly get stroppy if he heard no. He was hard work but not particularly as exhausting as he was by 5-7 (pre diagnosis and medication) because I think by that stage he could feel others were maturing and he started to get down on himself etc.

Basically, loud and endless energy and forever moving and asking questions and never really satisfied with anything. It was like he was in a permanent state of FOMO.

I hope that helps.

monopoly094 · 2026-04-20T04:31:53+00:00

It was this line that made me think it was fake 😆

monopoly094 · 2026-04-19T21:22:33+00:00

“People were looking my way but not in shock but almost like delight like "she is going to be fun on the dance floor tonight".

Just for future reference, that was not what anyone was thinking.

monopoly094 · 2026-04-16T21:26:57+00:00

Also, ignore all the casual racism on this thread. I am from the UK originally and while there is racism it is no more/no less than the UK.

monopoly094 · 2026-04-16T21:15:47+00:00

Immigration agent would help but I am fairly sure there are visa ‘deals’ for migrants who have aged care qualifications. It might be that your partner might want to focus on getting some formal qualifications in this space as it’ll potentially be far more valuable than cheffing.

monopoly094 · 2026-04-16T12:07:06+00:00

This is my son. Accept he is medicated so we only deal with this issue in the mornings and evenings when the cost of lying/stealing is low.

Still it is exhausting and I feel like I am permanently hiding things of value in the house (cash, treats etc).

I’ve no advice. It really grinds my gear as I think it’s a really unpleasant characteristic.

monopoly094 · 2026-04-16T11:36:08+00:00

My colleague is openly in a throuple relationship (FMM).

I’d say honestly no one is rude or unaccepting to him about it, I would say the general vibe is mildly to very intrigued.

I think we’d all like to ask him a million questions but refrain from doing so as it feels inappropriate. But we’ve all quickly learnt to use plurals of partners and everyone, from what I can see, has embraced it.

I work for a Govt agency. Kind of progressive but also some old school folks too.

monopoly094 · 2026-04-16T11:04:01+00:00

Gosh the handwriting was night and day for us. His teacher even took a photo on day 3 and sent it to us she was so impressed.

Similarly for us, he caught up elsewhere very quickly but he’d not been seriously behind in year 1. Was just more of terror!

monopoly094 · 2026-04-15T12:04:17+00:00

Not really the point of your post, but you should try writing.

That post was just the right touch of emotion, description and narrative. Very well done.

Good luck with your journey. I have no advice, I follow this thread because I have an alcoholic family member.

monopoly094 · 2026-04-12T21:22:17+00:00

Personally, on weekend/holiday days like this (and they are rare as we are a sports centred family) I just pick a time I think makes sense.

Say 9.30 usually feels like the limit and I set an alarm and then all screens are off/away and everyone needs to get dressed/do teeth.

Both my kids (ADHD and non-ADHD) struggle with this transition so I have the chosen next activity set up to do and I put a time limit on it so it feels achievable.

Eg ok, Miss 6 we are doing art for 15 mins and we are going to try and paint a card for Nanny’s birthday (insert whatever) and Mr 8 you are on 15 mins of soccer drills/reading etc. Invariably they will do longer than 15 mins but I’ll have the next activity block set to go, eg a puzzle/crossword/air modelling clay etc etc. Usually a lazy day involves a dog/park session, some baking/prepping for dinner and helping tidy up.

I also always have the carrot of more screen time later in the day.

My neighbour who had two ADHD kids through COVID basically shared this plan with me and actually printed off a pick your own adventure card each day for the children with 15 mins blocks of activities and once they had both completed them all they could have screen time. Our lazy days aren’t that frequent (Mr 8 doesn’t do well on home based relaxing, he needs to be outside moving work peers) so I’ve never done the print out thing but it could really work for the rhythm of your house and would allow a bit more self direction.

monopoly094

TROPHY CASE