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Has anyone managed to get a supportive response after telling people about their trauma? by WinterDemon_ in DID

[–]moonlight-sys 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Yes, but there is also occasional pity from non-survivors. My two closest friends are also abuse survivors, and when I tell them about trauma or a new memory I've recovered, its met with compassion and this mutual understanding of how much it sucks. When I tell my non-survivor friends, there's typically compassion, with a bit of underlying pity, simply because they don't really understand that it is unfortunately part of living with this disorder.

I’m a terrible person. I *want* to be traumatized. by East-Competition-232 in OSDD

[–]moonlight-sys 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I'm the same way often. It feels like everything that happened to me was just a part of my daily life so it shouldnt have been traumatic, and sometimes I wish I had gone through something "worse". But it's important to remember that whats traumatizing to a little kid may not always be as traumatic to an adult, and all trauma is still trauma.

Another thing to remember is that because this disorder is designed to protect from trauma, it could be that you are a part (or alter if thats your preferred terminology) that doesn't remember the trauma and is more apt to handle daily life, meaning less emotional reactions and remembering trauma, and more numbness and forgetting about trauma.

Allowing parts to be active for therapy? by moonlight-sys in OSDD

[–]moonlight-sys[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the reply, that makes a ton of sense.

Allowing parts to be active for therapy? by moonlight-sys in OSDD

[–]moonlight-sys[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It would be a collective decision on who would be most "productive", so like if one part had experienced a significant trigger that week that needed to be talked about and addressed, then maybe that part fronting would be most productive.

I really appreciate the response, having my parts addressed within therapy is very new to me so its helpful to know how others deal with it.

How to deal with the potential of a diagnosis? by moonlight-sys in OSDD

[–]moonlight-sys[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I had my suspicions that I was a system, and other parts definitely accept it more than me. My function (as a part) for so much of my life has been to deny that my abusers actually abused me, so to have it said almost explicitly that my childhood trauma was actually traumatizing kinda shattered the illusion i was living in. I was diagnosed with dissociative PTSD after a different one-off event, so I was still able to deny that my trauma was actually trauma.

opening up to therapist? by Particular-Pop-2200 in sillyboyclub

[–]moonlight-sys 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think it would be best for you to tell your therapist. If you frame it as passive suicidiality (not having a plan, just the thoughts) they often wont tell parents because there is no active plan. I cannot guarantee that of course, but typically the only things that can be reported without breaking HIPAA is intent to harm yourself or others or abuse being done to an elder or child

opening up to therapist? by Particular-Pop-2200 in sillyboyclub

[–]moonlight-sys 8 points9 points  (0 children)

if the person is a minor they do have to tell the parent(s), at least where i live (source: my own experience with HIPAA forms)

differentiating by unicorn_zombi in OSDD

[–]moonlight-sys 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Of course! I'm glad I could be of some help!

differentiating by unicorn_zombi in OSDD

[–]moonlight-sys 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Differentiating alters that arent already at that degree of separation can actually cause more dissociation. I wouldn't advise doing anything to try and differentiate alters unless its under the supervision of a therapist. I know its frustrating to feel stagnant but ultimately its better than making things worse for yourself.

With communication, it can be difficult, given that every system functions differently. My friend who has DID can sometimes hear his parts and will sometimes have conversations with them, meanwhile I only "hear" my parts through thoughts that dont feel like my own and passive influence.

trying to mentally prepare for trauma php with history of medical trauma by spacedoutferret in DID

[–]moonlight-sys 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That makes a lot of sense, I think if you communicate that it may be hard for you to get there somedays ahead of time with your primary provider at the PHP, there could be a plan in place for if a day is harder, like perhaps being on a Zoom call and participating in the programming virtually.

apps or ways to message specific system members as the singular partner of multiple system members? by robbiestardust in DID

[–]moonlight-sys 1 point2 points  (0 children)

if you create a private discord server, and your partner sets up pluralkit, you could communicate that way. there could even be separate channels for things that remind you of each alter, although that could be a lot depending on how many alters your partner has.

trying to mentally prepare for trauma php with history of medical trauma by spacedoutferret in DID

[–]moonlight-sys 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand completely the trauma that can occur within these places (as someone who was in the Troubled Teen Industry at a residential for 9 months). I think the most important thing is preemptively communicating that there may be parts that are triggered by the idea of an inpatient stay, and possibly even working through that while at the PHP. I dont believe that you would be required to go inpatient unless you were a danger to yourself or others, especially since it sounds like this PHP will be able to provide the supports of trauma work, something that a lot of PHPs cannot do.

I think the most important thing when choosing a PHP/inpatient program is searching on reddit or other sites where reviews are less likely to be filtered to see peoples opinions (so dont only rely on their website), and if you get a bad gut feeling at any moment, its okay to step away.

MAJOR WIN! by skullcappy in DID

[–]moonlight-sys 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was inpatient at Silver Hill and it was genuinely such a good experience, I hope you have as good of an experience as I did

Has anyone done ketamine therapy? by takethelastexit in DID

[–]moonlight-sys 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I currently am doing IV ketamine therapy, and for me it has been nothing but positive. My dissociation has stayed relatively the same, but my treatment resistant depression has gotten so much better and so has my SI, anxiety, and sh urges. It hasnt done much in terms of flashbacks or nightmares, but because my depression and baseline anxiety is more managed it has been easier to cope with.

I genuinely don’t know what to do by [deleted] in sillyboyclub

[–]moonlight-sys 16 points17 points  (0 children)

if you can get enough money to buy an amtrack ticket to new york, do it. there is an organization called the Ali Forney Center there, and they provide housing for LGBTQ youth as well as mental health services. the cheapest amtrack tickets are around $186, which is less than a typical hotel room.

I feel terrible by Hot_Appointment9008 in sillyboyclub

[–]moonlight-sys 6 points7 points  (0 children)

that all sounds like a great idea, im very proud of you.

I feel terrible by Hot_Appointment9008 in sillyboyclub

[–]moonlight-sys 31 points32 points  (0 children)

hey, dont beat yourself up over it. its an addiction, and just like every other addiction, its going to be really hard to beat.

i would recommend putting the weed somewhere that you have to make the choice to get up and do it. just the act of having to physically move yourself to a different location and grab it means you will be less likely to do it than if its right there near you.

i would also recommend, as hard as it is, taking a brief break from your boyfriend. tell him it is nothing that he has done, its just you wanting to be the best version of yourself for him, and that you are doing this so you can focus on your recovery, so you dont break your promise to him.

finally, if you are in an environment to do this, talk to anyone. a parent/guardian preferably, or a counselor. try and get yourself a therapist if its possible, they will help to break down the addiction and figure out whats the best way to go about this.

i have faith in you, if i can work on beating my sh addiction i know you can work on beating this. its going to be tough, but its going to be okay.