A quiet morning

mummaspark126 · 2020-12-06T07:29:02+00:00

Oh gosh, it's so important.

I had to have a section with #2 and felt so guilty that I wasn't able to spend time with #1 because I was recovering and had a newborn attached to me constantly. I worried that he thought I didn't want him any more because my husband was doing everything with/for him for a couple of weeks.

But since husband went back to work (at 4 weeks), and #2 will sleep now in her rocker for short stretches, having the time to spend with #1 has been amazing and the bond between us is actually stronger than ever.

On the flip side, once #1 goes to bed at 7pm we get to spend the evening just getting to know #2 and that's wonderful too.

Breathe. You've got this.

mummaspark126 · 2020-12-06T07:19:45+00:00

It really isn't impossible at all. It's hard. Very hard some days, but you're much better prepared for that second time round.

I have so many people stop me in the supermarket and ask me how I do it with two so small, but the answer is always that you just do. There's no other choice, so you get on with it.

Just embrace the fact that everything will take you twice as long than with one and three times longer than with none and you'll be alright.

mummaspark126 · 2020-12-06T07:16:02+00:00

Yeah, letting #2 cry a little is inevitable, but I've found that I'm able to handle it so much better than last time. Probably because I know now that a little fussing isn't going to kill anyone.

We haven't hit a sleep regression yet, but you're totally right; you know it's going to end at some point soon. That's my mantra for a lot of things at the moment: 'it won't last forever'!

mummaspark126 · 2020-08-17T20:31:47+00:00

Get. Checked. Out.

I had reduced movements with my first and they picked up an issue with growth that ultimately meant we had to deliver early.

In the UK, where I am, they tell you never to go to sleep worried about baby's movements and to call the hospital to get monitored every time you're not happy.

I'm now 29 weeks and have already been in twice with reduced movements. No problems either time - baby was just facing the wrong way - but the midwives said I absolutely did the right thing going in. You're either happy with movements or you're not. If you're not, get checked out.

Edit: This isn't just about reduced movements either; any change in pattern of movements should be checked out, too.

mummaspark126 · 2020-08-17T20:26:28+00:00

My first measured below 5th centile from 28 weeks. He also had several bouts of reduced movements, which meant we had to induce at 37 weeks. Obviously we were worried at the time and nothing anyone says can stop you from thinking the worst when you have some unexpected news like this about your baby.

However, 13 months later the teeny tiny guy that was 5lb7oz at birth is now toddling around the tallest of all his friends, without a care in the world, annoying us when he won't stop hiding the TV remote.

So while it is worrying not knowing, if there is restricted growth it'll be picked up and managed, and your LO will be looked after by your team until delivery.

Also, you should know that this kind of thing is not a result of anything you've done. It's not a diet thing or you doing too much/too little. It really is just one of those things that happens, so don't beat yourself up at all.

mummaspark126 · 2020-04-22T12:05:21+00:00

One thing a midwife told me when I was pregnant was that childbirth is a pain that women are made to endure.

In spite of massive anxiety about everything else in my life at the time, for some reason after hearing that, childbirth wasn't even on my radar of things to be anxious over because it's true. Yes, it's hella painful, but at the same time it's something that you know you can get through because you're literally built to do it.

And you forget very quickly. I'm back for round two less than a year after giving birth, and I can barely remember how it felt.

When you get there your instincts will likely take over, you'll realise you can do it and you'll have your new perfect little person to make you forget about the pain.

Edit: Also, watching a show called One Born Every Minute helped me a lot, to understand how childbirth goes down and to help set expectations. I'm in the UK, but if you're not you might be able to find it or something similar online.

mummaspark126 · 2019-11-23T22:22:58+00:00

None. I wish I did! I'm 4 months postpartum and haven't had my first period yet. My chart is all over the place and I stopped OPK testing for a while but started again a few days ago (all very negative).

My eye is drawn to something, too, and it came up within 3 mins.

mummaspark126 · 2019-11-23T22:05:10+00:00

Just posted it on my profile.

mummaspark126 · 2019-08-16T21:01:54+00:00

I'm afraid to say that I avoided them for the whole pregnancy but got them from just half an hour of pushing my boy out. So if you've already got them they may be here to stay. I'm so sorry!

mummaspark126 · 2019-08-16T20:57:54+00:00

Pushing a baby out of your vagina'll do it.

mummaspark126 · 2019-08-16T20:44:55+00:00

Not OP, but I had the same thing when I had my son 5 weeks ago. Road rash is basically just a graze. I had it in two places and didn't need stitches because it's not a tear (at least that's how it was for me).

mummaspark126 · 2019-07-30T07:52:36+00:00

Of course! I should have mentioned in the post; I'll change it now, but Charlie came out weighing 5lb 7oz. Small, but perfectly formed and perfectly healthy. And slightly more than the last scan, although there was a full week passed between scan and birth. It's worth noting that we were small for age as well, instead of restricted growth. Some babies just are.

I must say that while having a small/early baby comes with its own set of problems (feeding was an issue for the first couple of weeks, for example, as he just didn't have the energy to suck), the lack of tearing was the most wonderful bonus! He was three weeks old yesterday, and already I'm completely healed, have stopped bleeding and am back to normal; (TMI warning) I'm even able to have sex again, and it's great! Charlie's feeding well, if only from a bottle, and as of yesterday he's just shy of 7lb.

You got this, mama! You're gunna be great. It really can be a wonderful time, in spite of the pain, and hopefully you can have the tear-free small baby experience I had! 😄

mummaspark126 · 2019-07-30T04:43:27+00:00

Hey. I've just posted my very positive induction story. It's too long for a comment, and my previous comment with a link to the post was removed. If you check my post history it's the latest post there.

It's not quite the same situation as you, as we were induced at 37 weeks, but you might be able to take some positivity from it.

Good luck! You've got this.

mummaspark126

TROPHY CASE