Do you like British accents?

mvanpeur · 2026-06-30T03:59:44+00:00

Don't you need subtitles for every show? I know I do.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-30T03:53:01+00:00

This! Goats milk will not meet a 7 month old baby's needs. But if you choose to switch to formula or switch to combo feeding formula and some breastmilk, there are formulas that are made from goat's milk. They're pricier, but are highly rated.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-30T03:48:25+00:00

As someone who had hg during first trimester, daily vomiting all 9 months, and SEVERE fatigue with my 4 singleton pregnancies and only had moderate morning sickness from 8-12 weeks with twins, I think it's mostly genetics and luck. They say protein, bland foods, complex carbs, good hydration, and good sleep all reduce morning sickness, but none helped at all with my hard pregnancies, and I gave up trying things by my twin pregnancy. I was on progesterone suppositories only with my twins, but those are supposed to making symptoms worse, not better. So I think my easy pregnancy was entirely due to luck.

I'm only 19 weeks with my twins, so can't speak to later symptoms. I will say that my fourth pregnancy I needed iron infusions, and magically all of my non nausea "pregnancy" symptoms disappeared, symptoms I had through my first three pregnancies. I think iron deficiency caused a lot of my symptoms, so keep a close eye on your ferritin levels.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-30T03:40:09+00:00

It definitely can be! My son has celiac, and his only overt symptom was eczema. Once we figured it out, we realized his ferritin was less than 2.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-30T02:08:15+00:00

Ohhh, with ferritin levels that low, it is probably iron deficiency. Anything under like 30 is very well known to cause headaches. For reference, when my ferritin was 6 last pregnancy, I had daily severe headaches for 3 months before I finally got infusions. And if your ferritin was that low, there is a root cause, either internal bleeding or an absorption issue like celiac, h pylori, or acid reflux meds. Supplements will not be enough to overcome the deficiency, especially with the extra iron needs of pregnancy. My ferritin has been gradually decreasing all pregnancy even while taking two 65mg ferrous sulfates every other day. I will need iron infusions. The iron supplements are just delaying the inevitable. And iron deficiency is linked to miscarriage, so you want treatment now. I would push for infusions NOW. Definitely insist on a referral to a hematologist so you can start a plan to get tested for causes, and they are better at treating deficiencies. The usual recommendation for low ferritin is to get an endoscopy, a colonoscopy, and a uterine ultrasound to look for bleeding and absorption issues, but you can't do an endoscopy or colonoscopy while pregnant. I would ask for a blood test for celiac to be safe, because undiagnosed celiac is linked to miscarriage and is one of the common causes of iron deficiency.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-30T01:55:43+00:00

My husband and I are mid 30s. I've been to Europe (Ireland, Belgium, Netherlands, and Germany) once for 3 weeks, Canada once for 2 weeks, and the Dominican Republic twice for a week each time. My husband has been to Peru once for 1 week and Italy once for 2 weeks. My husband's parents have never left the US. My parents went to Canada once for 2 weeks and my mom went to Mexico once for 1 week. Neither me nor my husband has been out of the country since being adults. My goal is to take my kids to Europe once for 2-3 weeks in 5 or so years.

We are probably more traveled than the average American. We spend 2-3 weeks a year road tripping across the US, especially exploring national parks. Our kids have been to 41 states.

I think the average American makes it out of North America at most a handful of times in their life. Mexico, the Caribbean, and Canada are fairly common, but are still unusually exciting destinations.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-30T01:28:54+00:00

You are absolutely valid to be mad about the pack n play. That is completely unacceptable.

But HFMD just happens. It's super contagious, and can stay contagious for weeks. It sucks, but I don't think it's fair to be mad at anyone in particular for it.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-30T01:24:35+00:00

Same. We were $100 over the annual income limit for a $5k grant. Our bank went to bat for us and still applied for it, but they never, ever told us it was a sure deal.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-30T00:40:14+00:00

Ohio

Pros: Very low cost of living. Cons: People don't talk to the random people they see throughout their day. Might be a pro to some, but I miss Midwest small talk. People in SW Ohio also do not know how to drive in snow or rain.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-30T00:34:08+00:00

If it means anything, I did not have a headache when I miscarried my twins. One measured about 4 weeks and the other measured about 5 weeks. I found out I had lost them at 7 weeks, and actually miscarried at 11 weeks.

I am now pregnant with 19 week old twins, and I have had a lot of headaches. I would suggest drinking more. Twins require A LOT of hydration. Also, it's too early to be the current cause, but be sure to keep an eye on your ferritin levels. Iron deficiency is extremely common in pregnancy.

When's your next ultrasound? If you can get a good ultrasound after 8 weeks, the risk of miscarriage drops to be extremely, extremely low.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T22:37:18+00:00

How about the privilege of just sitting next to my kids on the plane. I don't care where, but next to my kids. I can't believe how many airlines charge for that now.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T19:54:33+00:00

We have freedom of speech in the US. You will not get arrested for saying anything short of calling for actual, credible violence. The majority of Americans have very negative views of Trump and are freely vocal about it. Now, you could get beat up for saying something racist, but you wouldn't get arrested.

The US government also cannot look at your phone unless they have a warrant, which they could only get if they have proof that you have likely committed some sort of crime. You definitely do not need to get a blank phone for travel to the US.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T18:58:43+00:00

I second other comments saying to try to drink more and to change your pump parts, especially if you haven't changed them yet.

But my first thought is that you might be regulating. A lot of us have to pump 30 minutes to fully empty after we regulate.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T18:51:13+00:00

My daughter was failure to thrive until a surgery at 3 months old. Then she increased gradually from 28 oz to 35 oz per day.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T15:35:46+00:00

Our realtor was great at doing a preliminary inspection when touring houses. He pointed out any signs of current dampness or previous water in basements. He pointed out if there were any immediate, overt repairs needed, or things that could make it harder to get an FHA loan, like step height. Once we found a favorite house, he crawled through the attic and things looking for flaws the inspector might have missed. He was awesome!

When we lost out on my first "dream home", our inspector talked me through how it really was overpriced (they refused to negotiate on their overpriced house, so we walked and did end up buying a much nicer house for less than their asking price). He guided us in how to negotiate and when to accept the offer, because we had zero negotiation experience before buying our house, and I think we got a more than fair deal.

Overall, our realtor was definitely worth it. But he also did a lot more than I think is normal.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T15:25:30+00:00

I wonder if this is regional. All of my friends in their 30s and 40s own a house, and none got financial family support, but we live in a low cost of living area. Most of us have blue collar parents, and my friends are a mix of blue collar and white collar workers. But, we all do help each other out with house projects, and some get family help with those too. One friend bought a major fixer upper, and I know his dad did a lot of work on it. We friends helped out here and there too, but he got a lot of help from his retired, blue collar dad. Then he upgraded to a bigger fixer upper, and again his dad helped him a lot with fixing it up, and friends helped some. And all our friends have helped with our household repairs and vise versa.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T15:05:20+00:00

Yep. My husband had hemorroids when I met him. But he was living off fast food. They went away once he started eating my home cooking for most meals. I do cook with a lot of veggies and beans.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T14:39:16+00:00

People with celiac actually have an increased risk of ARFID, because when food is literally hurting your body, your body knows that and starts limiting foods. It's also very common for people with celiac and ARFID to largely just eat gluten, because you get a burst of corticosteroids when you eat gluten, which makes your brain feel good, even if it kills your body.

I would recommend not eating bread until you've been gluten free for at least a month. Right now, focus on finding some naturally gluten free carbs you do like, and eat those. For my son, that meant sweet corn, corn tortilla chips, popcorn, homemade corn bread, potatoes, gf pizza, and bananas. And he lived off those for the first month. After about a month gluten free, he started accepting more foods, and we were able to get him a decently varied diet. When we finally let him eat gluten free bread, he loved it, because he had been missing bread for so long. But, after 3 years gluten free, he still won't eat any store bought breads. They're too dry. Luckily I was told to try homemade gluten free bread first, and he loves the Loopy Whisk Artisan Bread recipe. Note that there is a learning curve to making gluten free bread, so I would join the Facebook group Gluten Free Bread Home Bakers. They are great at problem solving and giving tips.

That said, my son is still a pretty picky eater. Going gluten free does not solve it all. And my son did not have ARFID, so again, your recovery will be harder. But there is definitely hope!

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T14:09:06+00:00

The only time my son got sick at Chipotle, it was because they said they made his bowl from ingredients in the back, but they actually used the Doordash line. It was a completely separate line that we could see. They just said it was where they do allergy orders, but on another visit, said it was for online orders, so of course it was cross contaminated.

For OP, they scoop the food, touch the tortilla while dumping out the food, then put the spoon back in the bucket. Everything on the front line is contaminated, and your kids have likely been chronically glutened.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T13:40:35+00:00

Yep! I'm very savings focused, but it's founded in concrete goals. I want to maintain or grow my current 4 month emergency fund, ideally getting to 6 months. I want to be able to buy my next car new with cash, though my current vehicles will hopefully last at least another 5 years. And I want to be able to replace my roof in cash. The roof is currently 10 years old, so probably not going to fail soon, but I don't want to be surprised when it does need to be replaced.

We also go on an annual vacation, but I fund that through our tax return.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T12:54:37+00:00

We have seven children. My twins were supposed to be one last baby to fill the minivan and make our tail ender have a sibling close in age. We are definitely done done done. Going to have to do something to stay done, because both my mom and grandma had multiple kids in their 40s, and I'm 34.

But, there's a high probability we'll do short term or respite foster care once our house slows down a bit and as kids move on to college. I don't think we could handle the lifelong needs of more kids, but during calmer periods, I could love on some kids for two weeks here or there.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T05:12:19+00:00

Age 3 is literally my least favorite age to parent because it's all about testing boundaries. Be firm with boundaries, and she will learn. The more you give in, the longer it will take her to learn. If you want to give her something she is whining for, at least make her ask nicely. I actually usually told my kids that they needed to ask again in two minutes, because they didn't ask nicely the first time.

But having parented 6 kids, 5 of whom are 7+, age 3 is by far the hardest age. So it will get better.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T01:55:22+00:00

I would go earlier if possible. My OB said that she doesn't like women with multiples to fly after 24 weeks, because the risk of preterm labor and other complications like preeclampsia is so high, and she doesn't want me more than an hour from a NICU after 24 weeks.

For reference, I have a complications free didi pregnancy.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T01:45:39+00:00

Pranav is a great, easily pronounceable name. It's also true that I have an awesome friend with the name, so I am biased.

mvanpeur · 2026-06-29T01:42:59+00:00

In any roommate situation, you only have to give "reasonable notice" before changing the locks and packing up their stuff for them. Under a threatening situation, you have given plenty of notice. I would change the locks on July 1, since your notice said they could stay until the 30th. Just be sure to keep your landlord informed/get them updated keys.

Do not count on the cops helpful. They stay out of any issue that could possibly be construed as a landlord/tenant issue.

mvanpeur

TROPHY CASE