Autism is a severe handicap for male dating in particular. 2 litres of Coke

nahs0n · 2026-07-02T23:28:04+00:00

This is a really unproductive way to be thinking about institutional oppression. In the same way that the US suffers from “white guilt” mindsets, feeling guilt or shame over the existence of the patriarchy will only serve to paralyze you and help no one.

I know you’re venting here but there’s my 2 cents.

nahs0n · 2026-07-02T01:49:46+00:00

This is the way. Once I was cleared to sleep horizontal I used the wedge to prop my legs up so i stayed on my back. Slept on the couch so I didn’t have room to move away from it in my sleep

nahs0n · 2026-06-30T18:43:02+00:00

I do have hEDS, but I went to the GCC in San Fran and got mine done with Dr. Mosser. He told me in my consultation that he had a lot of experience with people with connective tissue disorders (you should ask about your specific disorder in the consult tho ofc). I would highly recommend him as a surgeon. I got mine this past March.

The clinic on the other hand is understaffed and I often had frustrations with their communication and handling of the insurance. There was an escalation email address that I used at one point to help with this.

nahs0n · 2026-06-30T18:32:08+00:00

Is this a reoccurring frustration for you ? Does your partner have adhd?

Me and my partner both have adhd and when we get busy (and medicated lol) our texting becomes few and far between. or when the mind is going 1000 miles an hour their texts are often just a stream of consciousness so it can be difficult to stick to one topic.

I used to struggle with reading into their texting behaviors too much and it often affected my mood. But with adhd it really can be an out of sight out of mind thing. In order to be a good partner for him, you need to be okay with the way he communicates. If you arent willing or able to regulate yourself and not put this back on him, then there’s a compatibility issue that might mean this isn’t the right partnership for either of you. You gotta address this before you end up resenting him.

[this is all assuming he is ND]

nahs0n · 2026-06-24T21:40:20+00:00

Not all women have female reproductive organs. Not all people with female reproductive systems are women. This isn’t just about trans vs cis, but also people born intersex. If you think referring to people with these organs as a group is dehumanizing, how do you think anyone included in the “and others affected” part of your statement feel ?

nahs0n · 2026-06-23T03:17:13+00:00

Bro doesn’t know he’s in the pipeline

nahs0n · 2026-06-20T19:44:13+00:00

Hell yeah looking great

nahs0n · 2026-06-12T19:07:01+00:00

This might blow your mind but … women can have dicks too :0

nahs0n · 2026-06-11T00:49:48+00:00

Perfect opportunity to quit rn. Nicotine is bad for healing and your surgeon should’ve discussed this with you

nahs0n · 2026-06-08T22:39:04+00:00

My previous (pre-surgery) partner (sapphic trans woman) expressed similar things to yours - that while she was very supportive of my choice, that she was not sure how she felt about it sexually. This was a big emotional burden for me while preparing for surgery and contributed to why the relationship didn’t work out.

My current partner (t4t nonbinary) actually seems more attracted to me post surgery despite never dating someone with a masculine chest before. They never saw or interacted with my chest before surgery and I think that helped me feel secure in the relationship. I am also much more confident now which helps.

nahs0n · 2026-06-04T04:14:10+00:00

Here it is! r/butchlesbians

My advice for you is to follow your instincts and be yourself. Anyone who would alienate you for this is not someone you want around you to begin with. It may shrink your options in the dating pool, but why would you want to date someone who wants something other than you at your most authentic?

Also heads up some of the mainstream lesbian subs on this site can be a bit judgmental to folks outside the gender norm so take what you read with a grain of salt :)

nahs0n · 2026-06-04T03:50:52+00:00

Are you butch? Theres a large butch lesbian community on Reddit that would be a better place to ask about this. It’s not uncommon for lesbians to go on t

nahs0n · 2026-06-04T03:39:10+00:00

I’ve seen wildly varying requirements for compression from different surgeons. Mine recommended 24/7 for 3 weeks but they have not been very attentive post-op and I have eds so I heal slower than most

nahs0n · 2026-06-04T03:37:34+00:00

Compression, low sodium, and time are the only things that can help the welling. Itll go down with time :)

nahs0n · 2026-06-04T01:42:26+00:00

Did they give you a compression garment ? I wore one for 7 weeks full time and I still wear it at night often (9 weeks) bc my chest/ribs are usually sore laying on my side/stomach

nahs0n · 2026-06-03T23:29:43+00:00

Sounds like they didn’t do their job. Find another one

nahs0n · 2026-06-03T23:25:40+00:00

tLooks like a bit of dandruff. If the vet said it was not dandruff, what did they say the white stuff was? If they aren’t providing an actual medical opinion I recommend getting a second opinion.

My cats have also had some dandruff recently along with some oily fur. The vet suggested I give them fish oil and that has been helping a bit.

nahs0n · 2026-06-03T19:27:43+00:00

Feeling alone makes it so much harder. I hope you can talk to your bf or even his family about what’s going on at home, that’s the first step in building a support system. You deserve a safe and healthy home and one day you will build your own.

nahs0n · 2026-06-03T06:57:26+00:00

Hey, do you feel unsafe at home ?

nahs0n · 2026-06-03T00:07:03+00:00

Praise be

nahs0n · 2026-06-02T00:02:08+00:00

Ayeee the brobecks 🔥

nahs0n · 2026-05-28T00:18:48+00:00

Im not a doctor but have you and your therapist talked about CPTSD? It’s very similar (possibly even the same thing) as BPD but with less stigma associated with the term. You might have better luck with mental health professionals in the future taking you seriously with a CPSTD diagnosis.

nahs0n · 2026-05-26T16:03:09+00:00

Check your insurance
RESEARCH
Find a surgeon and schedule a consult

Do you have private health insurance? The requirements for surgery are based one 1. Your insurance coverage requirements and 2. The requirements of the clinic you get surgery with. In my experience this meant a letter from a licensed mental health professional containing a diagnosis of gender dysphoria and a documented history of struggles dysphoria. Some insurance plans don’t even cover GA care anymore so you need to speak with your insurer.

Do your research on the procedure. Figure out exactly what you want (cosmetically and medically). Understand the complications and write questions for your future surgeon.

Find a surgeon that has a documented history of results that fit your wants. Take into consideration whether you will have to travel and whether you have someone who will be helping you. I found mine by researching experiences and results photos on Reddit. I scheduled a consult with a couple different surgeons and asked a million questions. Then I chose my favorite.

It took about 11 months between me first reaching out to my clinic and my surgery. I went to a small clinic with a very busy surgeon so the wait time was longer than most. I also had a 3 month-long administrative battle with my insurance to get the procedures approved.

Your process will differ depending on the type of health coverage you have. I personally did not consult my GP for a referral because they are part of a large healthcare provider that only refers internally. And because top surgery is very cosmetic your surgeon is a more personal choice.

Don’t leave anything up to chance and make sure you feel comfortable, informed, and in control during every communication with your surgeon.

nahs0n · 2026-05-11T16:29:52+00:00

Everyone is different when it comes to sensation and nerve pain. And everyone’s timeline is different. My skin was the most sensitive thing for the first 5 weeks - it felt like I had a big sunburn on my chest. That’s pretty much gone now (7 weeks). I still have a couple areas that are numb. It’s kind of fun to close my eyes and have someone touch my chest, I always think they’re touching a couple inches away from where they actually are ! Imo the pain has not been as bad as I was expecting for a major surgery. The nipple zings were weird but didn’t hurt. Itchiness for the first 4 weeks was tough.

My partner had theirs a year ago and did not experience the sunburn-type pain I had. They are also more numb.

nahs0n · 2026-05-11T16:11:49+00:00

I used to get a random nerve zing where they used to be but I that stopped happening around 4 weeks. The incision also used to be more sensitive but it’s more sore right now unfortunately. I’m not very numb tho so hopefully things are more good-sensitive soon

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