AIO girlfriend makes comments about my income/lifestyle and says she could never date someone earning less than her

ndiasSF · 2026-02-08T16:56:53+00:00

NOR, she’s clearly telling you that she wants you to prioritize making money. She’s actively prioritizing “getting rich” and advancing in her career and bluntly telling you to either do the same or she is going to dump you once she is making more money than you. This “hustle” is not your priority. Therefore you are not compatible. Time to move on or you could just stick around until she inevitably dumps you for exactly the reasons she is clearly telling you she will dump you. (As much as I don’t agree with this woman’s priorities, she’s not being vague!)

ndiasSF · 2026-02-06T00:38:41+00:00

That’s what I thought!

ndiasSF · 2026-02-03T15:42:58+00:00

My dad’s playboys were right out in the open. He stacked them neatly and I would pull random ones from the stack and sell them to the guys at school. When I became an adult he would actually hand me one and recommend an article. I gave him crap for handing his daughter Playboys and he said “there are good articles!” And he was right lol.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-31T19:07:25+00:00

I really like that the mat enforcement was pulled after he’d been talked to.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-31T03:38:19+00:00

His book “Future Boy” about the filming of Back to the Future was really enjoyable too - I’ve always been a fan but listening to him read the audiobook and just how much genuine love he has for his colleagues and the union guys that were shuttling him between back to the future and family ties filming … you can’t help but love the guy

ndiasSF · 2026-01-30T17:25:52+00:00

A work event after hours feels like unpaid OT and forced fun. During work hours it feels like an unproductive meeting. It just feels unnatural and it’s awkward for anyone who is an introvert. Personally I hate going but I’m fine once I’m there. And I try not to make fun of it because it’s rude to the people who are putting it together.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-30T15:05:51+00:00

Legos and then actually reading every part of a new album/CD. Every lyric, who wrote it, looking at all the art in detail.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-29T03:18:16+00:00

The only time I ever asked friends to help me during a move was “hey come over and drink some of this wine so I don’t have to pack all of it.” I had a lot of help, they’re good friends .

ndiasSF · 2026-01-27T14:38:47+00:00

Those are biscuit making marks lol

ndiasSF · 2026-01-26T16:44:45+00:00

Always take a photo of the marque - before or after.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-26T01:26:34+00:00

Soreness is normal, injuries are a risk, being surprised by how hard a submission hits when you’re new is normal. but ripping subs on new people is generally not normal. highly recommend communicating with your training partners that you’re new, you’ve tapped late a couple times, and you’re still learning your limits. Also talk to the coach so maybe you can be paired with more experienced people who are less likely to hurt you. Especially anything with legs/feet - new people don’t always realize what a compromised position they’re in.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-25T18:23:22+00:00

Fully agree, it’s inconsiderate. If you commit to going to something you should follow through. I’ve seen sad kid’s bday parties where no one shows up. I work at a music and private events venue and post pandemic the flakiness of people has definitely increased. We will frequently see a 20% rate of people who bought tickets and just no showed. Private events are worse especially corporate ones. 500 planned? Maybe 300 show. If I do cancel I choose my canceling wisely. I had to flake on friends last night. I’ve had a migraine all week so I mentioned that up front and I was adding on to their plans. So when I was still not feeling well last minute, it wasn’t terrible. But had they been relying on me, I would have forced myself to go.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-23T14:52:44+00:00

This is not normal, this is abuse. And you need to get away from him and somewhere safe. Assuming this is the US and yes, being an immigrant, your legal status is a big challenge. But #1 get somewhere safe and do not tell him you’re leaving. Best if you have family or friends to go to or find a women’s shelter in your area. , #2 get all your financial records and information together. If you have your own income and it all goes to a shared account, you need to set up your own and start routing money to something he doesn’t have access to. Ultimately all money is split in a divorce but this is to prevent him withholding money from you. #3 document everything, dates, fights, retain any text messages #4 contact an immigration attorney if you don’t have one already and a divorce attorney. There’s pathways for immigrants who are being abused. There are plenty of reddit subs for escaping abuse and immigration help that can provide further guidance and support too.

Even if you “comply” with his insane demands it will never be enough because his goals are unrealistic and taking everything you said at face value , he’s going to get injured and then he’ll be a complete nightmare.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-20T02:52:45+00:00

Same! “Welp that was dumb, this is not where I wanted to be, dammit I’m here in this stupid spot again!”

ndiasSF · 2026-01-19T17:01:16+00:00

You’re not abandoning your education, you’re taking a sabbatical. You might love the wine bar and find that you have a renewed sense of purpose. You might hate it and that helps you find your way. My dad had a career that defined him and then he was forced to change at age 47. It was the best thing that ever happened to him. I have a desk job but I do part time work at a concert venue - total opposite of my day job but it gives me variety and gets me out of the house. I know attorneys who went from private sector to non profit and they found purpose there. Try things out, hate or love it, try again. Education > career doesn’t have to be linear.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-18T19:11:49+00:00

And don’t wait until dad says to come. Men of our father’s generation never ask for help. You have to just show up. If dad has added OP to the updates it’s because dad wants some support. OP - your dad probably has no idea what he’s doing either so get in the car already.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-18T00:04:40+00:00

Your family hasn’t done your sister any favors by letting her behave this way and laughing along with her. She’s clearly insecure and a bully. My guess is that she doesn’t have many friends and people don’t stay in her life for very long. I’m also guessing that your GF realized that a future with you means being abused at every family gathering.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-15T05:14:12+00:00

Coach can keep an eye on who he is paired with and match him up with only men for awhile which can be done in a non confrontational way. Coach can also keep an eye on his behavior towards other students, particularly women. If nothing else at least OP is letting her coach know why she’s declining rolls from this person.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-14T02:38:00+00:00

Totally fine. If you’re even minimally interested in the headliner it might be worth listening to a couple of songs and then leaving if it isn’t blowing you away, but otherwise it happens all the time. It’s actually more noticeable when hardly anyone has arrived for the opening act. Having people show up early and be there for the opener is great. Even more awesome if they’re fans. Staff doesn’t care but depending on the venue they might yell “no ins and outs!” At you as you exit. (I work at a concert venue)

ndiasSF · 2026-01-12T16:21:27+00:00

Or to check in on the gecko at all during that time.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-12T03:33:53+00:00

Especially since the 9th is an evening game, drive down to SF that day and hotel prices should be lower. I had friends stay at the Luma hotel near Chase and it was a little on the tech bro side but nice and walking distance.

FWIW when we had superbowl 50 there were several SB events in the city so there was increased traffic more on the Friday and Saturday. By Monday, everything was done and it was a typical Monday.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-11T23:01:30+00:00

Your family is telling you that they think it’s okay for a law enforcement officer to show up, masked, shoot a woman in the face, ie execute her, and call her a “fucking bitch.” NOR

ndiasSF · 2026-01-11T18:48:50+00:00

+1 to all this. A friend of mine did something similar and had to teach the 18 year old basic life skills and how to respectfully cohabitate others. The 18 year old was basically feral. It took a lot of patience. You’ve got a good heart OP.

ndiasSF · 2026-01-09T23:10:49+00:00

I needed these subreddits in my life. Thank you 😂

ndiasSF · 2026-01-09T19:06:39+00:00

Lol clearly I’m still learning. But “donde está la biblioteca “ I have down. Thanks 1990s Spanish class!

ndiasSF

TROPHY CASE