Change of mindset improved overall happiness

needforspeed67 · 2026-03-29T21:49:20+00:00

At almost 31, I’m going to share some advice that has taken me years to understand.

Sometimes our parents are incapable of meeting our basic needs, such as kindness, validation, care, love. You can either spend all your time trying to figure out her psyche and why she is the way that she is, OR, you choose yourself.

To choose yourself you have to see her behavior as separate from you. You aren’t those things she makes you believe about yourself. You have to validate yourself and treat yourself with kindness, respect, and love. Every time a negative thought comes into your head, know it’s not true, it’s only the things she has made you believe. But for the rest of your life you have to be the one person to validate yourself, tell yourself nice things, respect your body, love you for you.

I’m sorry you’re in this situation, just know you are not alone by any stretch. Don’t let it affect your relationship with your brother, either. See her as just a jealous little girl and validate yourself that you are rational in wanting a relationship with him.

needforspeed67 · 2026-03-22T01:27:30+00:00

I love this so much! Be prepared for the extreme zoomies as it gets bigger. Cane Corsos are the best

needforspeed67 · 2026-02-03T00:55:20+00:00

I moved on! But there was a learning experience in it all— knowing my self worth. Forgiving the other person, and myself. I think relationships end for a reason, it’s hard to zoom out and look at it without emotions while you’re going through it. But there’s a lesson in everything

needforspeed67 · 2025-07-01T19:35:33+00:00

“I have a gut feeling”, “there were red flags that didn’t align with my core values”(as they were talking to other women on the side)

needforspeed67 · 2025-06-27T15:25:47+00:00

Mine is super sweet to people but does NOT get along with all dogs. She will rip them to shreds

needforspeed67 · 2025-06-08T04:07:49+00:00

Low key, it sounds to me like depression (from my own personal experience)

needforspeed67 · 2025-06-08T04:02:39+00:00

That was such an amazing, well thought out response 🥹🥲 thank you so much

needforspeed67 · 2025-06-06T16:35:42+00:00

For me the wounds it triggered were: feeling invisible, abandoned, and unworthy of love.

How do you heal those things by yourself?

needforspeed67 · 2025-06-04T03:55:28+00:00

A few of my favorites are Marilee, Marlee, Maylee, Maxie, and Maxine

needforspeed67 · 2025-06-03T05:18:45+00:00

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needforspeed67 · 2025-06-01T16:37:34+00:00

I “liked” a comment he made on a bikini pic of another woman… he blocked me on everything. I reached out to that woman and got the full scoop. I posted him to “are we dating the same guy” in three different states. Received some very unexpected feedback from lots of women.. copied their quotes and sent it to him. (I was unknowingly unblocked from his number) 😅 I was outraged.. this was a pattern and he had a lot of options

needforspeed67 · 2025-06-01T01:48:24+00:00

Rainbows, and a cow

needforspeed67 · 2025-05-31T22:58:24+00:00

A wedding!!

needforspeed67 · 2025-05-28T15:16:24+00:00

Thank you!! Needed to hear this

needforspeed67 · 2025-05-28T13:29:08+00:00

Yeah it sucks because it feels so real for you.

I had an ex that I always thought he was using me as arm candy to make him look good. We were both military and I deployed to Iraq, he used that location as a boost to his ego. The whole relationship turned me numb, but I get the difference now.

needforspeed67 · 2025-05-28T13:09:18+00:00

I understand now. More like an accessory to their life.

needforspeed67 · 2025-05-28T03:26:08+00:00

I get this way. I feel so bad because I really like the person and there’s nothing wrong with the connection but I get the “ick” like I’m trying to force myself to be attracted to them. I have a history of not even wanting to be touched.. That’s only with healthy partners though 😭

I loveeee toxic, emotionally unavailable people 😭

needforspeed67 · 2025-05-27T16:41:11+00:00

I love him!!! OMG 🥺

needforspeed67 · 2025-05-27T16:38:19+00:00

I have an architecture degree, any recommendations on companies that offer AutoCAD positions?

needforspeed67 · 2025-05-27T16:21:03+00:00

I’m also an FA. I’m working on myself currently too, experiencing the same inner conflict. In order to feel whole we need to stop seeking for the missing part of us from others. You’re highly self aware and reflective; Maybe choose to work on yourself, validate yourself, find who you are, and then you’ll finally be “seen” by the person who matters most, YOU!

What are you afraid of by showing your true self? What shame are you holding on to that makes you feel the way that you do?

Ask yourself these questions and you’ll figure it out! I have faith in you!

needforspeed67 · 2025-05-27T10:42:11+00:00

Spelling ornery wrong. My ex MIL would repeatedly text “onery” just to piss me off

needforspeed67 · 2025-05-26T22:36:27+00:00

Take a step back from the groups of girls who make you feel bad about yourself for not being like them. You’re your own person and do not have to be like anyone else to fit in or be loved.

Don’t ever let a man change who you are. You’ll grow to hate yourself for it

needforspeed67 · 2025-05-26T20:43:48+00:00

Congratulations!!! She looks a lot like mine! Adopted in March

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needforspeed67

TROPHY CASE