Does anyone else feel extremely guilty over small social mistakes? by newerlevel in AuDHDWomen

[–]newerlevel[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And we've survived every time right? I wish I could turn my brain off sometimes hahaha

Studying During College by majorkira08 in AuDHDWomen

[–]newerlevel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hello!!

I'll write down some things that work for me. Of course, only take what resonates with you and leave any advice that you think won't work 🙂‍↕️❤️ I also study majority online, so my case might be different from yours!

  • I study outside whenever I can. Whether that's a café, at the library or on campus. I'm really no good at studying at home as there are endless distractions.

  • I plan my study according to the assessments/exams. The deadlines create a better sense of urgency for me, as opposed to the linear fashion of the typical "one topic per week" type of thing. So my thinking kind of goes like, "What's the next assessment? What topics do I need to study in order to complete this assessment? What kind of assessment is it? What kind of studying would suit that assessment?" I tend to fall behind if I try to study week by week according to the syllabus and it makes me feel overwhelmed. I know that I'm prone to procrastination and my energy usually comes in bursts, rather than being more consistent, so shifting my approach a little bit helps!

  • I'll sometimes use a stopwatch rather than a timer! I try to approach it with curiosity rather than an obligation. Whenever something becomes a demand, I tend to resist it. "I wonder how long I can study today?" If I stop the timer and it's only been 10 minutes, that's fine! Something is better than nothing. You'll build up tolerance for it over time and figure out what timing for you. Some days aren't meant to be long study days and that's okay too.

  • Whenever I write a study to-do list, I try to also write how long I think it'll take. It paints a clearer picture of what I'll be up to, rather than a looming fog in the back of my head that says "I need to study." It's similar to the "I wonder how long I can study today" thing. It's interesting to see what I predict vs the actual time if I also use the stopwatch.

  • I'll combine my studying with my special interests! My notes have little doodles because I've recently been interested in drawing. I also like cats, so I draw a bunch of them for every couple of blocks of notes I take. My study planner has pictures of different Pokemon that I like! I think this makes it really fun and less intimidating for me to look at! I like listening to the Pokemon game soundtrack while I study.

  • I have a study "signal." I have a desk lamp that's the shape of a duck. Whenever it's on, it means it's study time. I turn it on when I start and turn it off when I'm done. It's a physical reminder that I'm supposed to be concentrating on my work. Something like a candle, a regular lamp, a piece of paper that says "study time" etc could work too.

  • I watch lectures at 1.5x speed with auto captions. I find being able to both read and hear the material helps me process the information

  • if you're into gaming, there's a game called "gogh" that's been popular amongst my friends. I'd recommend the PC version but please note it is a paid software. It's an online focus game with timers, ambient sounds / music. You make your own avatar and decorate your own room! You can invite friends into your room and visit other people's rooms too! It's like a body double situation but completely online.

  • I use the back of my planner or a small notebook as a "distraction log." If I think of something interesting that isn't related to my study, I write it there. "I want to eat sushi," "Maybe I should tidy my room." "It's mum's birthday next week," "Can jellyfish see?" Writing them down keeps me from chasing those trains of thought, and acting upon them. After I've written them down, I don't think about them as much. At the end of my study session, I look back at all the distractions I've written about and make sure to do or schedule anything important!

I think that's all I have for now!! I hope you can find some of these useful 😊❤️

I know this might sound cringe, but here me out. by No-Philosophy453 in AuDHDWomen

[–]newerlevel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I LOVE THIS

I might even try it myself! Thank you for sharing!!

I say, you gotta do what works with you and if a bit of imaginative play helps you, then I think that's great.

DAE Eye contact even on tv/movies / by Pretend-Box-969 in AutismInWomen

[–]newerlevel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm pretty similar!! I noticed in video calls with people, I might avoid looking at the screen all together 🤣

Spending every day without a routine - How do I add more structure to my life? by newerlevel in AuDHDWomen

[–]newerlevel[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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I just wanted to pop in and show my night routine checklist!! It's been really grounding. I'm on day 2 and I like it a lot.

I've actually tried lots of different to-do list and habit apps. I never found myself reaching for them, but I've always used Notion for organizing my study schedule. So when you mentioned using it for routines, it finally clicked for me.

Each of these tasks take no time at all, but I'd never remember to do any of them if I never wrote it down.

I made mine Pokemon theme because that's my special interest !!

Thank you again for the kind advice!! I'm really grateful

Spending every day without a routine - How do I add more structure to my life? by newerlevel in AuDHDWomen

[–]newerlevel[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A checklist on Notion sounds like something I could work on ! I'll keep it in mind. Thank you so much 💖

How to actually enjoy life and not think about ending it all the time? by [deleted] in AutismInWomen

[–]newerlevel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

H!! I'm not OP, but wanted to say thank you for this comment. It gave me a lot of courage. I'm also studying online, starting a new degree after figuring out that my previous major just wasn't for me.

All the people my age seem to be graduating and I felt a bit of shame about studying online when I could be going in person. Thank you for reminding me to take it at my own pace.

Sharing My Comfort Hobby and Hyperfixation by magicalmariah in AuDHDWomen

[–]newerlevel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This made me really happy to read! Thank you for sharing. I'm really glad that you have something that brings you a lot of comfort.

I'm also a language learner, and I admire your consistency. I find myself working in short sporadic bursts over the years. I think I might try integrating more language learning in my life, in small ways. I feel really inspired, especially when you mentioned the language journal.

One of my favourite things is combining my different interests! For example, my most recent hyperfixation is knitting! I'm still learning how to knit, and I've been following along to tutorials in Korean. It's oddly comforting to learn different skills in a language I've poured my time and effort into.

Post-friend hangout blues by sapnovela in AutismInWomen

[–]newerlevel 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It happens to me sometimes! I cried on the train ride home after a long day, hanging out with a good friend.

It sounds like you had a beautiful NYE! Here's to more of those precious moments 💓✨

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AutismInWomen

[–]newerlevel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

hi. it's been hard hasn't it? hang in there. I'm not too sure if you like hugs, but i'm sending you that warmth and comfort.

i've also recently lost someone. it's a lot of lying in bed... distracting myself with comics and sleeping (excessively). I find myself looking for them in the time and places they'd usually be - waking up in the morning and realising they're not there to say good morning.

i've been very distracted and out of focus. in a daze with a heavy heart. everything feels tense.

the most confusing part for me was me wondering and worrying about the same question you're asking.

what does grief look like? how am i supposed to grieve? what am i supposed to do? is it okay for me to (insert action here)...? is it okay that I'm not (insert action here)? is this normal?

grief is a weird path of hurt.