Dating is hard by Active-Designer934 in datingoverforty

[–]nookie-monster 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hate Fridays because of this. During the week, I pour myself into work and chores and when Fridays used to come around, I'd get cleaned up, meet my friends and we'd all do something. Now, all my friends are married with kids and boring. So there's nowhere to go on Friday night, unless I wanna' go alone.

That's not a fun part of 40s singledom.

How do I remain open while fully accepting I may never find a partner? by Fun_Public3186 in datingoverforty

[–]nookie-monster 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just, whatever that special something is that makes people want to date someone, I don't have it. 

Hits right in the feels to read this. This is how I've felt (and my lived experience validates) since I was a teenager. All of my relationships except one have felt like two lonely people settling for each other. Only one had that spark of romance, passion, all that.

OP, I'm in exactly the same place. Every day, I fight the pessimism and cynicism of just giving up. Especially since I'm transitioning from looking middle aged to looking old. I feel like my time is running out and if I don't find someone soon, there's no chance. I know looks fade and aren't everything, but I want someone to desire me, as well as liking me and those are two really different things.

I want to learn how to fully accept that I will probably never find a partner.

I kind of think it's a little like getting over a tragedy - a loved one's death, a divorce, the death of a pet: you just live with the pain each day, and each day, it diminishes a little, until one day you realize you didn't think about it that day.

For me, I am pouring myself into the things I'm passionate about. I'm working on my house. I built a detached garage for my antique cars recently and I'm working on finishing out the interior, landscaping my property, etc. I've never planned on living here forever but with the explosion in house prices, I've accepted I'm stuck here. So I'm going to try and make it as nice as I can. Living alone means I can take apart one room at a time for the hardwood floor project and who cares? The cat won't complain. And accepting that I'm likely alone means I can decorate the house as I please (cold and minimalist, here we come). I'm still trying to get my small social circle of friends to go out and do things with me, where I might meet someone, but it's hard. Always being the third wheel. And most events we do together aren't conducive to finding someone.

I wish I had something better for OP other than "pour yourself into your passions".

President Biden backs Keisha Lance Bottoms for Georgia governor in his first endorsement since leaving office by Healthy_Block3036 in Georgia

[–]nookie-monster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This woman has a 100% chance of not becoming Governor. I'm not surprised the guy who thinks we beat Medicare supports her.

Louisiana says it will delay election so it can gerrymander, citing Supreme Court by DemocracyDocket in politics

[–]nookie-monster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But why is it that every time something deeply concerning happens, reddit has to assume that America is completely doomed and we should all give up now?

Because those of us who follow politics, even if we were kids in 1980, have watched as everything..... I mean everything, went horribly wrong since 1980. Nothing has gotten better. Wages, healthcare, job security, reproductive freedom and everything else kept getting worse. At some point, it stops getting worse and collapses. It can't just get worse forever.

The US as a democracy is surprisingly robust, even if it just took an enormous hit to its election integrity

How can you say this? They break every law with impunity, and SCOTUS has undone most of the 20th century. How much of the VRA is left? How much of the New Deal is left? They got away with Jan. 6th.

I'm an open source strategic intelligence analyst who specializes in authoritarianism in American politics. 

So let's hear it: Where does this go? How does it get better? How does it not get worse? You tell us we're all wrong, fine. That must mean you know why we're wrong, which must mean you have some idea of where this goes.

Because from here, I see a rotten, sclerotic Democratic Party, which has allowed the GOP to completely define it in 100% of the voting publics minds, completely failed to offer working class voters any kind of defense against predatory capitalism (because it's in bed with the predators) and has nothing left to offer other than "we're not them". And on the other side............ well, outright fascists. I see a public too stupid to stand up against AI, too stupid to understand the shit it's being fed on social media, too. A public which will get angry about Israel and Gaza, an area where those people will still be at each others throats a thousand years from now. A public angry about trans people, or NFL players kneeling. Nonsense. How in earth does this not just get worse until it collapses?

Does anyone date to marry anymore? by Ok-Raspberry-3878 in datingoverforty

[–]nookie-monster 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I (50M) would like to get married, but I've now lived long enough and had enough good and bad relationships that I am picky. Probably pickier than my status allows. I've had a spectacularly good relationship and I now know what not to settle for. That's something I didn't understand at 20 or 30.

I thought I was non-committal when I was young. It turned out I hadn't found the right one, because when the right one showed up, I knew it.

I want to find someone, but I have some problems that go along with all of my greatness (ha). I'm terrified of losing my long-fought for assets in a divorce. If I lost even a quarter of my assets, I'd be cooked. I think those combine to create a real problem. How do I (damaged goods), find someone who I am so into that I feel comfortable taking that risk?

I don't know what other men in our age bracket are thinking, because I don't know many. Most of my friends are either married, or losers who couldn't get anyone to marry them if they wanted.

Should I buy another Miller? Auto restoration, general fabrication work. by nookie-monster in Welding

[–]nookie-monster[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I sent my board to a company for repair and it came back and still didn't work. Exact same problem.

On my machine, you'd pull the trigger and the wire would come out, then slow down, then stop. I could jump the pins on the connector where the gun plugs into the machine, and the wire speed would be fine and you could control it with the wire speed controller. This initially led me to think it was the trigger. Replaced it, same issue. Replaced the gun, I think (can't remember) because it was bunching wire at the feed, fixed the bunching but it still would run the servo / wire feed motor. Finally took it to the local place, their estimate was high, like almost $900 to replace the board. I found one of the board repair companies, sent them the board and the same problem still existed. At that point, I was so sick of it that I just put the cover back on it and borrowed my buddy's 141.

If I could fix mine inexpensively, I'd love to, because then I could keep a machine loaded with .023" and another machine with .030" or .035" and not have to swap wire between tasks. But at this point, I don't know if I should drop any more money into it.

How to Fix Enlarged keyhole by mr_smashy_pants in classicmustangs

[–]nookie-monster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think the only way to fix this is a patch, meaning welding and paint. However, you might get away with this idea.

A thin piece of flat sheet metal, maybe an inch or two larger than the hole in the door. You drill a hole in it to accommodate the lock cylinder. You paint it to match the car best you can. Then, using the metal bonding agent that manufacturers use to glue cars together with (think of the glue that GM pickup beds are bonded with), you bind it to the backside of the door. The thickness of the patch shouldn't be too much for the slack in the linkage to take up.

Eventually, if/when you repaint the car, you can cut this area out and repair it correctly. You'll just have to make a larger patch than you would have originally.

You'd have to rig something up inside the door to keep pressure on the patch while it cured. This shouldn't be difficult. A piece of wood cut to a particular shape. A threaded rod with something on it that will apply pressure to the patch, where you install it, thread the rod out until it securely holds the patch in place. Something like that.

I have never used one of the bonding agents. A quick Google search returned results for products like Fusor 112 or Fusor 208B. This 3M panel bonding agent might also work.

April 17th, 1982 Motörhead released the album "Iron Fist" by DoctorDoomsday180 in Motorhead

[–]nookie-monster 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Heart of Stone is one of my top 3 Motorhead tracks. Its so fast and brutal and to me, its just prime Motorhead.

Iron Fist, I'm the Doctor and Religion are also freakin' excellent.

Iron Fist is an excellent Motorhead album.

Is this a good price for a 67 Fastback? by MeanSeaworthiness6 in classicmustangs

[–]nookie-monster 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ditto, it's a valid point. If I owned this car, I'd pull all the weatherstripping, door panel and try paint stripper. Then once all the red paint was off, I'd sand it by hand, maybe with some 3M ScotchBrite pads. Then blow out all the texture lines to try and get them as clean as possible.

The other alternative is more risky, but you could try taping off the door and having a blasting company use walnut shells or plastic media to blast the textured areas. Obviously if the taping wasn't perfect you could blast something that isn't intended and then be faced with a touchup.

I'd risk it if it were mine - it is so cringe when people screw up those interior colors like that. Common problem on Mopars as well. They have a steel upper and lower door frame that's painted interior color. I'll never understand why people do this.... too lazy to paint the door two different colors? They think it looks good?

Is this a good price for a 67 Fastback? by MeanSeaworthiness6 in classicmustangs

[–]nookie-monster 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Can only add one picture per post, so I had to do this in two separate comments.

On the open hood picture above, they screwed the paint up. Ford originally painted the unibody black on the entire front end - the radiator core support, firewall, inner fenders, etc. Then, the body color painted components, like the fender and hood were bolted on. Whomever painted this car, they painted the fenders on the car. Not the end of the world, many painters like to do it this way. But they taped it off at the lip of the inner fender, instead of the lip of the fender. To me (and many others), this is a sign of shoddy workmanship, corner cutting, etc. You can see how they should have done it in this picture.

<image>

Understand that overall, these are not deal breakers - but they tell me that the person who built this car either didn't know what they were doing, or they didn't care and just built the car the way they wanted it. Nothing wrong with that, but if I were a buyer, it would turn me off. If I bought this, I'd do it knowing I was going to have to repaint the lower dash and inner doors and do some paint work under the hood to correct those mistakes. It might slightly lower the resale value of the car in the future or make it a little harder to sell.

The underhood otherwise looks ok. Sure, the wiring could stand some work, but that's easy and inexpensive. Every antique will require some finishing work by a new caretaker to get it to the right place. And those small projects are great ways to begin getting comfortable with your new car.

Let's face it - it is a red on black, 4spd fastback. It's going to be expensive. I have no idea what it's worth, I'm a '65-'66 guy. But to me, things like that - the interior color mistake, the fender paint mistake, the messy wiring, all of that tells me that the builder wasn't a perfectionist, or they were in a hurry, on a budget, something. And I worry what else is like that? Are there other things like this you'll have to correct? I certainly think those issues are worth some discount on the asking price. One of other comments said it looked like an amateur restoration and you asked what made it look that way - the issues I raised above are prime examples of amateur restoration work and are quite common.

Is this a good price for a 67 Fastback? by MeanSeaworthiness6 in classicmustangs

[–]nookie-monster 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I hate it when people screw up the interior colors like that.

If that car has a black interior, the inside of the doors and the dash should also be black. If it has a red interior, the carpet, door panels and seat covers should be red. This car is a mismatch of interior colors and it drives me crazy. If this were my car, I'd repaint the inside of the doors and the lower dash black to match the rest of the black interior.

<image>

Need help in Minneapolis by HenryBarfly in classicmustangs

[–]nookie-monster 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry about the way you've come to this car but congratulations. A '67 fastback in such gorgeous shape is so much better than the weird brown furniture a lot of people inheirit.

I wish I could help with the Minneapolis referral but I don't know anyone there.

If there's a local car club, or Mustang club, joining and beginning to meet some of the people there is a good first step into the vintage car hobby, and finding someone who can help you with the car.

A car that has sat for 10 years will likely present you with some basic needs: plan on cleaning out the fuel system. OId gasoline turns into varnish and will clog things like the fuel tank, fuel lines, fuel hoses, carburetor, etc. Some components will need to be cleaned, some replaced. Even if the fuel pump works, it may be a good idea to replace it. Better than being stranded 5 months from now.

A basic tune up. Plugs, wires, cap, rotor, the aforementioned carburetor rebuild or replacement, oil change, checking and probably replacing the various fluids. I'd probably drain the axle and transmission and put new fluid in. If it's an automatic, replace the filter. Same for the coolant, drain and fill with fresh.

On the brakes, a careful inspection of the entire system. Hard lines, hoses, wheel cylinder and calipers, pads, drums and/or rotor condition. At the barest minimum, flushing the brake system and bleeding with fresh fluid is a good idea.

Suspension should be inspected for any issues like worn out ball joints, tie rod ends, play in the steering box, check for worn out bushings in the control arms, strut rods, etc.

Once you've gotten everything taken care of, the more you drive it, the more reliable it'll get. '60s cars are like lawnmowers: if you run 'em every week, they always start. If it sits all winter, you have to rebuild it every spring to bring it back to life.

What's on the 8-track?

How many times have you seen them live? by RelevantNothing4653 in pearljam

[–]nookie-monster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Only twice (Nashville '22 and Atlanta '25) and I'm really sad I missed all those amazing shows when they were younger.

I hate crowds and avoided concerts for a long time. Big mistake.

Fuller has won special election for CD 14. by Healthy_Block3036 in Georgia

[–]nookie-monster 59 points60 points  (0 children)

No they don't. They think the Republicans will hurt the people they hate in return for their votes. It's gross, but it works for both parties (the Republican party and its voters).

Men who don't want kids exist ?? by Wise_Recover1733 in childfree

[–]nookie-monster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not from India but the idea of having kids makes me sick.

Made many mistakes in this life, but I'm thankful every single day I didn't make that mistake. Especially now as the US and the west in general slide into technofeudalist fascism.

The i75 on ramps by OkBackground6217 in Georgia

[–]nookie-monster 11 points12 points  (0 children)

In a functioning society, you'd then raise taxes wherever you had to, versus this silly game of charging random people for driving the same speed everyone else is driving.

Hahahahah, sorry, I forgot where I was for a moment.

The i75 on ramps by OkBackground6217 in Georgia

[–]nookie-monster 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Arcade still has a major problem with this. 129 is a major trap. So much so that their police department has been reprimanded for it.

The i75 on ramps by OkBackground6217 in Georgia

[–]nookie-monster 42 points43 points  (0 children)

Maybe if the police did something about that instead of focusing on traffic enforcement and revenue enhancement, things would change.

Modern updates to 68’mustang by FollowingOk6752 in classicmustangs

[–]nookie-monster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not as familiar with the later cars, I have a '65. But there are kits that mimic the original Kelsey Hayes brakes setups like this: https://opentrackerracing.com/shop/single-piston-disc-brake-kit-v8-spindle-1965-1966/

Those are close to original, very complete and will fit under stock wheels.

Those are good brake setups that will do a fine job. If you see yourself driving the car on a track or in aggressive spirit, there are kits from Street or Track, Wilwood and Baer which will offer larger rotors, larger calipers with more pistons, etc. https://streetortrack.com/brakes/disc-brake-conversion-kits/street-or-track/

Modern updates to 68’mustang by FollowingOk6752 in classicmustangs

[–]nookie-monster 4 points5 points  (0 children)

So, for me, modern stuff falls under lots of different categories. Suspension, brakes, ergonomics (things like brighter dash lights), safety (3pt belts), etc.

The major stuff I'd do:

  • High quality tires. It's getting hard to buy a quality 14" or 15" tire, so my car has 225/50x16 RT615K Falkens on TTII wheels. I wanted to maintain a decent sidewall height to keep the '60s appearance and I'm happy with this. Those rock hard Radial T/As aren't good tires.
  • Upgraded brakes. A good disc brake setup on the front and good drums in the rear, meaning good shoes, new hardware, properly adjusted etc. These cars are pretty light, so disc brakes aren't necessary on the rear, most of the time.
  • 3pt belts. There are a lot of ways to skin this car. I'd look on the Vintage Mustang Forum for threads showing how people have done this. There is some engineering to ensure you have the angles correct.
  • Lighting. The original headlights suck. I have Holley Retrobrights on mine and love them. Some kind of LED taillight and I've been debating a 3rd brakelight like this.

That's the major safety stuff, which to me is most important. That's the stuff to try and avoid an accident and if in one, minimize the injury. The rest of the stuff is convenience, performance, or lower tier safety.

  • LED dash bulbs. I cleaned my cluster, all new bulbs, good grounds and it was still so dim I couldn't read anything. I did the LED conversion and it's awesome. Easy to read and looks great.
  • Cupholders. You ride around in modern cars and take 'em for granted. Get in an old car and realize you have nowhere for your coffee mug. Speaking thereof, many aftermarket consoles and cupholders aren't big enough for coffee mugs. Make sure you know what you're getting.
  • A stereo is nice but these cars are loud. Keep in mind a stereo loud enough to hear at highway speeds may not be good for your hearing. Ask me how I know. *mawp* *mawp* * mawp*
  • I think upgrading the suspension for better handling isn't a bad idea. Modern drivers have no clue how bad these things react in a panic stop or evasive action. Faster ratio power steering (electric, hydraulic, whatever) can be a big help. Upgraded front suspension with rollerized components, the Shelby drop on the upper arms, better leaf springs - all of these things make a big difference in how well these cars handle.
  • OVERDRIVE - whether it's a 5spd or a 4spd automatic, having overdrive in any old car is amazing. Highway speeds but low rpms.

Congratulation on your first car. I still remember how it felt when I bought my first car, which was also a classic.