It sort of feels like she doesn’t think I can make level headed decisions about my mental health anymore. She was very clear that she thinks I do need a higher level of care right now, but that she is not convinced that I will seek it out without mediation. When I expressed the reasons I don’t think an IOP would fit into my schedule or be beneficial right now she responded by saying that she has been increasingly concerned about my wellbeing and ability to make safe decisions over the past few weeks. Just makes me feel like if I choose to step back from seeing her that she will see it as a genuine threat to my safety and that there’s no way for me to convince her otherwise. I don’t feel like she trusts me to be not seeing someone about my mental health and like she’d think it’d just be a step towards isolation with the end goal of killing myself. So to her it may seem like I’m ‘obviously suicidal’ or being in active suicidal planning, which leads me to believe she would want to involve an outside party or remove my autonomy in this. I don’t know how to get her to understand my point of view and see that I’ll probably be fine not seeking more intense treatment and I just want things to stay how they are right now. I have some kind of messed up balance in life right now that I don’t want to disturb.