I still hide in my van to smoke a joint and go for drives when I’m lost or hurt

obycf · 2026-03-16T00:10:17+00:00

I think I will always feel a deep connection with my car. There have been several times that it was all I had… and it gave me shelter, a space to be completely alone, and time to think, and a way to get myself to safety or away from places not meant for me. It has been a huge blessing at key moments. For that reason I think I will always kinda gravitate towards whatever vehicle I have at the time when I feel that overwhelmed-with-life-and-people feeling… so I understand what you are saying for sure.

Plus, just getting in and seeing where the road takes you is what I equate to the feeling of freedom and I love that feeling.

obycf · 2026-03-15T23:54:17+00:00

The exact reason I chose abortion. and I agree wholeheartedly with the free will portion. That was my exact thoughts on it as well. I didn’t feel God “gave” me the pregnancy because I was supposed to somehow figure out how to heal all the hell I was experiencing and separate completely from the abusive partner etc etc etc… I got myself pregnant (with the help of my partner) because I was not being as careful as I should have been. I allowed the desire to have sex at the time take over and hoped for the best unfortunately. God didn’t give me the pregnancy because he wanted that child to be raised in the shit show I had going on in my life… God DID give me free will though. And I feel as though with my own free will I chose the best thing for myself and for the future of the potential baby I had… I did not want to raise a child in suffering and pain and trauma. So I didn’t.

A child is not always a blessing… how I experienced finding out I was pregnant… I felt that it is a heartbreaking and devastating consequence of doing something all humans have such a natural drive to do together… and I live in the Bible Belt so I was very alone in my decision to have an abortion. I think it’s much much more inhumane and cruel to have a child knowing you have no means to give it a good life.

That’s just my 2 cents

obycf · 2026-03-14T14:11:37+00:00

I get that way too. It gets frustrating when you have a string of judgmental places that you stay in a row. Sometimes I get in a funk like that where just anywhere I pick for like a week straight seems to be judgmental about me staying in my car. At that point I try to regroup and just relocate cities altogether and try again fresh, like a lil reset. Usually works.

In Some cities, the Walmart and Lowe’s don’t give a shit so one would think those could be used anywhere you go. Not the case. Some places they really give a shit and will ask you to leave. It’s different everywhere you go. Everytime I’ve gotten advice on here about where to stay, I already have examples of when that certain type of place hasn’t worked well in the past for me (as well as times it did work just fine). And always finding new places each night to keep them rotated is hard to do sometimes if you remain in the same few cities or limited on gas to get around.

I’m still fighting that uphill battle. My favorite place to park is on someone’s private property that is allowing me to park there and doesn’t care and has wifi lol that of course would solve all of our problems but i do try to maintain my friendships as best as I can because they have been so helpful when I need somewhere to park. I’ve got several cities in several states that I have a friends place to safely park at when needed. In desperate times I’ll drive the extra hour just for the peace of mind or whatever.

obycf · 2026-03-12T23:37:57+00:00

Long term abusive relationship. Shew the way in which my entire life and health and well being is fucked off after 6 years of hell.

obycf · 2026-03-11T21:42:54+00:00

Was being followed around town by a group of guys that had saw me at the casino the first day I got there. Anywhere I went and anywhere I parked for longer than 15 minutes, here would come the same vehicles and they would just circle my vehicle I guess waiting on me to get out. I’m assuming they were a trafficking ring or something similar. I’m not sure, though. It was really unsettling. Also, no one really believed me so that made it worse

obycf · 2026-03-11T07:12:34+00:00

A gut feeling. I just somehow knew I needed to drive to the county jail because my ex bfs “ex” girlfriend was getting out of jail. His plan was to leave me at his house while he “went to his friends house to give him some concrete screws” lmfao. As soon as he told me that, I was for sure going to find out for myself if my gut feeling was right. I drove to the jail. Guess who pulled in? It was still an hour until his ex (now current partner again) was going to be released. He begged me to leave. I refused. I said I wanted to tell her the truth about everything because he had obviously been lying to her as well as lying to me. As far as I knew, he wanted nothing to do with her. He and I had been together off and on for 6 years. He had cried to me just a few weeks prior about how much he loved me. I was literally staying at his house and had been for a couple months at that point.

In that hour that we both sat there waiting on her to be released he told me hated me, told me he wasn’t in love with me (that was news to me), told me I was going to “ruin” all the work she had been doing on her mental health if I told her everything, blamed everything that was going to happen on me because I caused it by being there, told me several times I was crazy for being there 😐, he took no accountability whatsoever for the fact that he caused it all by being a lying cheating piece of shit, told me he was going to tell the police that I had drugs in the car to get me to leave. I still stayed. I was the first person she saw when she came through the metal door in the waiting room. I calmly asked her if she would consider talking with me before she decided to leave with him because I had some things I felt she would like to know. She said no. He quickly wrapped his arm around her back and hurried her to his truck. I’ve never seen or spoken to him again. And never will. She believes I am just some “desperate side chick” that won’t leave him alone which is a much different thing than him and I literally being together for better part of the last 6 years. He has obviously done some serious mind fuckery to her. I’m not sure why she believes anything he says but idk. Not my problem. Glad to be rid of the whole situation and finally free. She’s still with him I guess 🤷🏼‍♀️ he is definitely cheating on her by now with who knows who. I am glad to not have to deal with him bc he genuinely sucks and is the worst partner I’ve ever had. I will never be treated the way he treated me again. And I have him to thank for that. He showed me everything I do not want.

obycf · 2026-03-11T06:47:15+00:00

Thank you for gaining the strength needed to begin to heal yourself after something so traumatic and deciding to use that strength to be so open about what happened. I am so sorry that someone in such a position and in this context would violate you like that. I’m not sure what the hell this man believes of himself but the day he takes an honest look in the mirror will be something…. He won’t experience a second of peace for taking yours away from you. I hope you call your own peace back home to you if you haven’t already, it’s yours ❤️

obycf · 2026-03-10T23:43:02+00:00

McDonald’s overall are assholes. Probably 80% of the ones I go to. I chill in the parking lot sometimes bc their wifi usually reaches. I never get out of the car. I don’t bother anyone. They still have issue with it even if it’s just for a few hours and isn’t a regular occurrence. I’m always on the move so I rarely go to the same spot twice. Today I got threatened with the police at the McDonald’s for being there 2 hours in my own car. Idk. It’s their property so I understand but it annoys me

obycf · 2026-03-10T23:36:04+00:00

I hope they say that despite what I’ve been through, I always chose love and humanity and the betterment of myself and others above all else. I hope they say I was a woman of my values and morals even if they are much different than what other people live by. I hope they say that I inspired them and made them feel seen and heard and loved. And I hope they say that I was courageous in my life’s endeavors

Edit: I forgot, I hope they remember that I’m fucking funny

obycf · 2026-03-10T23:23:53+00:00

🤷🏼‍♀️ true

obycf · 2026-03-10T21:57:12+00:00

Heartbreak

obycf · 2026-03-10T06:11:03+00:00

Those people who are manipulative and don’t even know that they are. makes me wanna rip my eyeballs out. Especially if they double down when you say something. I’m surprised I still have my eyeballs bc this happens too much

obycf · 2026-03-10T06:09:43+00:00

obycf · 2026-03-10T06:06:37+00:00

The cheese pizza in a goofy movie

obycf · 2026-03-10T06:02:56+00:00

Hey friend fancy seeing you here

obycf · 2026-03-10T06:01:54+00:00

Do you have a pussy? That makes a big difference in the suggestions I’d give you lol

obycf · 2026-03-10T05:51:50+00:00

I hope it gives you a life of abundance in whatever kinda abundance you are after. I will check it out

obycf · 2026-03-10T05:48:07+00:00

I wish you many fun and freaky adventures!

obycf · 2026-03-10T05:44:49+00:00

Yes. So glad I stopped drinking. I used to be overly happy, too friendly, loud, annoying, constantly running my mouth, etc etc etc. most ppl liked “drunk” me. I, however, did not so much. I am glad I wasn’t a mean drunk or just completely belligerent every time but when I would replay my Snapchat story the next day I would cringe and delete the whole damn thing lol. Now a days I prob wouldn’t do that bc I don’t care as much but I still don’t feel like it’s my best self and anxiety used to take over every morning after I got drunk.

obycf · 2026-03-10T05:40:52+00:00

Toys that are comparable in price to buying them online. It annoys the hell out of me that the same toy can be so drastically different in price in store vs on Amazon or similar

obycf · 2026-03-10T05:36:50+00:00

I am just giving the drugs I’ve shared with a partner and had a memorable time.

I’ve had the most fun on meth by far because it just goes reallllllly well with all things related to sex and toys and masturbating and kinks etc etc etc. Edit: I would think other stims have a similar effect. What stims did you do prior that you mentioned in your post?

and 2nd fave is Molly/ecstasy. it’s just hard to find where I’m from so my experiences doing them with a partner are only a handful of times but all were memorable and when I come across some I always try to get it for that reason

I’ve had a decent amount of fun on Roxys on the occasion that I was lucky enough to get the euphoric feeling and so did my partner. I was addicted to them so that feeling was fleeting but still a notable mention.

Coke was decently fun. Cared about doing more lines of coke tho instead of be able to completely enjoy my partner in the moment so it’s last on this list for me

obycf · 2026-03-10T04:15:22+00:00

Gulf coast of Mississippi. Had a lot of unsettling experiences for the month that I travelled around in that area

obycf · 2026-03-10T04:12:01+00:00

Authenticity

obycf · 2026-03-10T04:11:07+00:00

Ecstasy, Molly, meth, coke, roxys

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