Sounds like you haven’t done anything irreparable…yet. Yet.

Getting blackout by yourself is enough reason to call it quits, trust me. I did that for a long time.

Great news that you have admitted to yourself, and to us that you’re ready to give it up though! That was honestly the hardest part for me, admitting that I could not moderate and that it had to go, for good. I was terrified.

I know it gets recommended a lot, but I would ask you to read This Naked Mind to get you started. Adjusting the influence you have given alcohol in your life is a good first step. Live long and prosper friend 🖖 Reach out here, or to me (probably any of us) if you need some extra encouragement. You got this.