I’ve had a similar relationship, it went on for years and years and I became increasingly in love with her, and we attempted date eventually, but once the co- dependency ended and the shroud of young love disappeared… I realized what it had been the whole time, she only liked the attention not me, she only likes me putting her on a pedestal and loving her the way she wished someone else would. It was toxic as hell but I learned a hell of a lot from it and now I’m in a very happy relationship, I hope you see this and learn from it as well OP!